Your Therapist is Not Okay

Pride is often associated with celebration, joy, and visibility — but it has always been rooted in resistance, too. In this episode, Ryan and Jessie talk about Queer Rage Month and the emotions that many members of the LGBTQIA2S+ community are carrying in today's political climate. The conversation touches on the growing attacks on trans rights, and the ways some members of the queer community...

In part two of last week's conversation, Jessie and Ryan shift their focus to the therapy room and what it means to truly make space for Black and immigrant experiences. Using Podcast Producer, Denise's story as a starting point, they explore some of the ways therapists can unintentionally miss the mark, the importance of cultural humility, why curiosity is often more valuable than assumpt...

This week, Jess and Ryan are yet again joined by a very special guest: the person who usually sits behind the scenes bringing the podcast to life. Denise shares her experience of moving from Nigeria to Canada as an international student and what it's been like building a life here over the last decade. This conversation explores the different sides of starting over in a new country — the painf...

Healing and growing aren't always clean or exciting processes sometimes they come with a quiet sense of loss that’s hard to name. In this episode, Jessie and Ryan talk about what it’s like to outgrow relationships and the grief that can come with that shift, even when nothing “bad” has happened. They explore what it looks like and how to work through the process of noticing distance — or the n...

Unfortunately, growth isn't always something that happens alongside the people we love. Sometimes, as we learn more about ourselves, set new boundaries, or begin healing old wounds, our relationships start to feel different too. In this episode, Jess and Ryan explore what it can be like when you're doing the work in therapy but the people around you aren't on the same path. They talk a...

In this follow-up episode, Jess and Ryan dive into a question a lot of people have but don't always know how to ask: how do you actually have better sex? They talk about the role of communication, consent, curiosity, and emotional safety in creating a more satisfying sex life. From exploring fantasies and kink to discussing desires, boundaries, and aftercare, they unpack some of the conversati...

Sex can be a surprisingly difficult thing to talk about in relationships, even when you’re close to your partner. In this episode, Jess and Ryan talk about the reality of sex over the course of a relationship — the highs, the lows, the awkward conversations, the mismatched needs, and the pressure people often feel around intimacy. They get into how hard it can be to bring up things like dissatisfa...

In this episode, Jess and Ryan shift into the “how do we actually work with this” side of conflict. They get into the patterns couples fall into and what therapists often focus on in couples therapy room when things get tense — especially when conversations start to spiral or shut down. They explore a few ways of approaching conflict that can make it feel less overwhelming in the moment, like slow...

From the early honeymoon period where everything feels easy and connected, to the shift into patterns like bickering, shutting down, or giving each other the silent treatment, this episode is about exploring the full cycle of conflict that often shows up in couples work or that clients talk about in the therapy room. Jess and Ryan talk about why that transition happens, and how quickly relationshi...

It’s not uncommon to leave a session and think about your therapist as a person. To wonder about their life, or how they’re doing, or what things are like for them outside that hour. In this episode, Jess and Ryan talk about what it means when that curiosity turns into care — and even into a desire to give something back. They explore why that can feel meaningful, and also why it can get complicat...

Let's talk about loneliness. In this episode, Jess and Ryan talk about the loneliness epidemic and how they’re seeing it show up in their clients’ lives from feeling disconnected even in relationships to struggling to find a sense of belonging, or even just feeling a bit on the outside of everything. They also get into what people actually do with that loneliness. The ways clients try to find...

In the last episode, Jess and Ryan talked about what it’s like for clients who feel like the villain in their own story — the guilt, shame, and self-blame that can make it really hard to open up in therapy. In this episode, they shift the focus to the therapist’s side of the room. What is it like for therapists when clients are afraid to share something because they worry it might change how they’...

There are moments in therapy where clients arrive carrying a deep sense of being “the villain” in their story. In this episode, Jess and Ryan explore what that can look like across different experiences — whether it’s tied to identity, like internalized homophobia in queer clients, concerns around appearance or gender expression, or life events such as divorce or relationship betrayal. They discus...

In this episode, Jess and Ryan talk about something most people never see: what it’s like for therapists when they realize they might need to cancel a session or take time off. It’s usually not a quick or easy decision. There’s often a lot of back and forth — wondering if they should push through, worrying about how it might affect clients, and sitting with the guilt that can come with stepping aw...

After an unexpected three-month hiatus, Jess and Ryan are back! In this episode, they talk about something that doesn’t get discussed very often: what it’s like for clients when their therapist has to take time off. Whether the reason is big or small, shared openly or left unsaid, a therapist’s absence can bring up a lot of feelings. Jess and Ryan explore the kinds of reactions clients may have —...

After an unexpected three-month hiatus, we’re finally back! In this episode, we share where we’ve been, Jess opens up with some personal news, and we talk about when regular episodes will return. Thank you for your patience while we were away — we’re SO excited to be back 💕Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)Produced and edited...

Jess and Ryan sit down to share the advice they wish someone had given them when they first stepped into psychotherapy training. They talk about how becoming a therapist quietly reshapes your personal relationships, the moments of identity shift no one warns you about, and how to actually get the most out of expensive, exhausting training programs. They also get real about burnout - how to spot it...

Jess and Ryan pick up where they left off, this time getting into what it actually looks like to decolonize therapy in practice. They talk through different cultural models of healing — the ones that center community, storytelling, or collective care — and how those approaches sometimes blend beautifully with Western therapy…and sometimes clash with it. They also get honest about their own prefere...

In this long-awaited episode, Jess and Ryan dive into how they’ve come to understand the colonial roots of modern therapy — not through theory alone, but through the uncomfortable realizations that show up once you start noticing who gets to define what healing actually means. They talk about the parts of their own training that now feel narrow or incomplete, the unlearning they’ve had to do over...

What happens when someone finds out they’re talking to a therapist at a party? Jess and Ryan have been there — and it’s never boring 😂 In this episode, they share their funniest, most awkward, and most eye-opening stories of what happens when people discover what they do for a living outside the therapy room. From being cornered for “just a quick question” to watching the energy in the room insta...

Self-harm is one of those topics that can feel scary to talk about — for clients and therapists. Today's conversation is a tender one. We’re exploring self-harm from a therapist’s perspective and why it’s rarely about “attention” — and always about pain that needs understanding. Jess and Ryan talk about what self-harm really is (and isn’t), why people use it to cope, common misunderstandings,...

Let’s be real — therapy can be expensive, and it can feel frustrating when the bill keeps adding up. In this episode, Jess and Ryan get honest about why therapy costs what it does and what clients don’t always see behind the scenes. They talk about the unglamorous parts of the job — endless admin, training, fees — and the emotional side of it too: the guilt and sadness that come when clients can’t...

Ever wondered what exactly psychedelic therapy is all about? In this episode, we sit down with a special guest, Monica Lau - an expert therapist in psychedelic healing - to explore the full journey of this fascinating and controversial approach. We discuss how psychedelic therapy sessions typically work, the kinds of insights and transformations people experience, and the potential downsides you s...

Ever wondered what it's like for your therapist to see their own therapist? 👀 Spoiler alert: it's just as messy for them as it is for you. In this episode, Jess and Ryan laugh (and cringe) their way through the ironic truth that knowing all the tools doesn’t always mean they use them. They also open up about their own experiences in the client chair - the awkward, the disappointing, and t...

Jess and Ryan are going there. In this episode, they open up about how the topic of sex shows up in the therapy room in all it's complicated and uncomplicated ways. They talk about what clients are really asking, how therapists navigate those conversations, and why talking about sex doesn’t have to be uncomfortable. Tune in for a warm, open discussion that makes the awkward and confusing parts...