Your Other Family

Will Cooper makes his debut audio appearance on the YOB Podcast Network! He traces his decision to become a pastor all the way back to childhood, and he reminisces about coming out to his church early into his joining YOB. He also brings some of his favorite poetry to share, including a poem from his YOB namesake William Cowper, as Tom also shares his favorite poem. Enjoy the episode! And always r...

Many folks in our community bear wounds and baggage from churches, be it local bodies or broader denominations. What do we do with our church angst? How should we rightly frame our motivations or expectations for attending church as gay or SSA-identifying folks? Join Tom, Ryan, and Aaron as he makes his YOBcast debut, as we share our journeys of finding, connecting, and serving in the local church...

It is finished.

We follow up on one of our most downloaded episodes of all-time with a sequel of sorts! After learning Jacob's coming out story with his big brother Nate, we invite Tom's younger brother Andy onto the show to learn Tom's coming out story. Did Andy ever suspect anything about Tom's sexuality? How can straight brothers best support their gay brothers? And what does Andy think about his big brother d...

Join us as Tom convos with one of our authors, Ben! We catch up with Ben from his last ConvoCast appearance and talk about his message on chosen family at our recently held YOBBERS retreat. We also riff about proportional haircuts, Ben’s upcoming blog on coming out to people you love, and where (and with whom) a pastor get his support. Also, who's YOB’s pastor: Ben or Will?? Enjoy the episode! And...

The beginning of a new year often leads us to new physical fitness routines (including starting one). But so many of us have difficult relationships with working out: wounds from high school locker rooms, daunting equipment, comparing ourselves with the other men around us, and ultimately dissatisfaction with our own bodies. Are these hard things worth pushing through? Join Tom, Ryan, and Matt for...

The YOB ConvoCast continues with another 20-minute conversation! And it’s all thanks to our increased support on Patreon. Thank you, patrons! This episode Tom convos with one of our authors, Daniel from London! We catch up with the no-longer-unsung hero of the YOB website and our recently held YOBBERS digital retreat. We hear how the pandemic is going across the pond, and Daniel teaches Tom some F...

Gregory Coles joins us for a conversation on belonging as we discuss his new book, No Longer Strangers: Finding Belonging in a World of Alienation. We learn some of Greg’s story, growing up as a missionary’s kid in Indonesia, and his winding journey of geographical and cultural belonging in the United States. We also talk to Greg about the aftermath of coming out in his first book, Single, Gay, Ch...

The YOB ConvoCast returns after nearly a year away! And it's all thanks to our increasing support on Patreon. Thank you, patrons! To kick things off again with these 20-minute one-on-one episodes, Tom talks to one of our newer authors and a first-time podcast guest: Aaron! Tom recounts one of his favorite memories with Aaron while walking through the Minneapolis sculpture garden. The two also talk...

Gender identity isn't something we've been brave enough to tackle on our podcast -- until now. Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob as we welcome Dr. Preston Sprinkle to the show to talk about his new book, Embodied: Transgender Identities, the Church, and What the Bible Has to Say. We talk about the challenge and hospitality of using people's pronouns, the layered concept of what some would say it means to...

It's our last episode of 2020! AKA the most phenomenal year that ever was. Join Tom, Ryan, Jacob, and returning guest Nate for a fun, nonspecifically topical, yet holiday-themed episode with discussions like our favorite (and least favorite) Christmas carols and when is the proper time to start (and stop) playing Christmas music. We also dive a little deeper by determining the identities of our ow...

Pieter Valk joins us for a discussion on monastic or intentional community, with particular regard to his Nashville Family of Brothers. We talk about the logistics of living under one roof with fellow single celibate male believers: what happens every week, who's in charge, how do you join, and how long do you stay?   We also dive deeper into the practice of living intentionally under the same roo...

What even is attraction? Is it only physical, sexual, and romantic? Or is it something more? Something that can be platonic yet intimate, something more nuanced and layered? Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob for a discussion on attraction: the varying types of attraction, the difference between physical and sexual attraction, and whether it’s okay to experience attraction – even romantic – for your friend...

For years a certain topic has been on the YOBcast radar. But it would be a deep dive like no other. Finally, we're taking the time to talk about sexual fetishes. Disclaimer: this episode may not be for everyone as we list some fetishes in an effort to give context to the topic. Listen at your own discretion. Join Tom, Dean, and Matt for our long anticipated conversation on fetishes. We start with...

October is LGBT History Month, and October 11th is National Coming Out Day. What better time than now to share some of our coming out stories? Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob for a discussion on their coming out journeys, including how we first came out to ourselves, to God, and ultimately to others. We also give some coming out advice to those who are selectively out or still in the closet altogether....

We're back to answer some amazing YOBBERS questions from our "Side A" Friends podcast from a few episodes back. Join Tom, Dean, and Matt for another deep dive into the world of "Side A" friendships: that is, those friendships with fellow LGBT+ believers who hold an affirming view of same-sex sexual relationships. Some questions we tackle in this follow-up episode include: Would you go to a Side A...

When do you feel manly? When do you feel not at all manly? Is "manliness" even something worth pursuing? Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob for a return to one of our "classic" episodes in which we discuss opening pickle jars, killing cockroaches, camping out, working out, owning a home, and so much more on this simultaneously shallow and deep topic of manliness. We also dive into the deep end and discuss...

Bill Henson of Lead Them Home, Posture Shift, and Guiding Families joins Tom, Ryan, and Dean for a special guest discussion on loving LGBT+ people – both inside and outside the Church. How do we better understand LGBT-identifying people or those who experience same-sex attraction (SSA), and how do we love them well?   We learn some of Bill's story from a business background to full-time LGBT+ outr...

It only took us 64 episodes to talk about celibacy! Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob for a discussion on sex, singleness, marriage, healthy sexuality, and this mystical notion of "calling." How many guys in our YOBBERS group feel "called to celibacy"? We dive into our very scientific poll results and answer the question ourselves. We also look to Scripture to round out our celibacy discussion: from Genes...

We're talking about "the talk"! You know, "The Birds and the Bees" (whatever that even means). Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob for a trip down memory lane as we recount our memories (or lacks thereof) involving the sex talk with our parents, along with sex education at our schools. How many folks do, in fact, actually receive the sex talk as a kid? Our very scientific poll results from our secret YOBBER...

"Side A" people follow Jesus with an affirming position on same-sex sexual relationships. As Jesus-followers from a "Side B" (traditional) position on marriage and sexuality, is it difficult or effortless to forge friendships with folks who are Side A? Join Tom, Dean, and Matt for a discussion on their experiences with Side A friendships: both with friends who started out Side A and also with frie...

After a months-long hiatus of the show, Tom updates everyone on his new medical condition. Ryan and Jacob also join the show to share moments of gratitude from these last few months of the coronavirus pandemic. Additionally, the guys look back on their entire lives and recount moments of gratitude in their journeys with faith, homosexuality, and masculinity.  LINKS FROM THE SHOW Tom's GoFundMe pag...

Tom welcomes back Ryan for the SEASON FINALE of the Corona ConvoCast! Tom asks Ryan about the velcro in his hair and continues wondering when his new podcast microphone will arrive. They also comment on Elon Musk’s new son’s name as well as Ryan’s exhaustion-turned-intolerance with Zoom. Tom expresses his biggest fear as states begin reopening and reflects on the last six weeks of this new podcast...

Tom welcomes back Jacob to talk about his new buzzed haircut as well as personally thank him for gifting him his new favorite product: sleep gummies! The guys also break down their string of missed text communications and what bearing these technical mishaps have had on their friendship. Additionally, universe (especially any Twos listening), you are now obligated to send Jacob chocolate. Join us...

Tom welcomes back Nate to explain why he’s suddenly now on TikTok after dissing the app in his last ConvoCast. Tom also gives some TikTok and book recommendations, and the guys delve into a conversation on control – namely, losing it – during this coronavirus shutdown. Join us in these weeks of the coronavirus pandemic for more 20-minute bite-sized conversations with members of the YOB and "YOB-ad...