Wine, Whine, and Once

FINALLY, a calm in the storm of the hellhole that is Neverland. Sure, we're still trapped. And sure, we still hate this half of the season, but it's impossible to not be OBSESSED with Regina pretending to be Ursula to trick Ariel into giving Snow White a pair of fins. 10/10 execution. Other stuff probably happens too, but does it really matter? Who cares if David's stuck on Neverland f...

In a SHOCKING turn of events, we have a backstory episode that will have no weight or impact on future episodes! Oh wait.... that's most of this entire season. Our bad! In a pathetic attempt at a redemption story for our beloathed Killian, we're given his tragic backstory of military missions, Pegasus sails, a lying king, and a brother that dies after slicing his vein open with Dreamshade....

What's worse than Peter Pan blowing into a pan flute while making direct eye contact? No seriously, we want to know what. Because that seems like the WORST thing imaginable if you ask us! Episode four continues to drag our asses through Neverland, this time with some more Rumple/Pan backstory in which Peter Pan is the WORST and should certainly not be allowed around kids. David is still dying,...

A disgraced fairy and an evil queen walk into a bar . . . That's not a joke, that's just the entire plot of the episode, and that is 100% accurate. Aside from continuing to drag us slowly and mercilessly through Neverland, we get some fun Tinker Bell lore. And by fun we mean mostly useless aside from the fact that with Tinker Bell comes Robin Hood! And we love him! In other news, Emma cont...

We know episode one was a doozy. But at LEAST episode two is plot heavy and really helps us understand why we are in Neverland. Oh wait. That is a different show. Our beloved OUaT is many things. Consistent is not one of them. On episode two of our eternal trek in Neverland, Emma decides that after finally having the family she always wanted, she still feels like an Orphan. This realization someho...

We're back, bitches! While this was certainly a longer break than we planned on, we are THRILLED to be back with season three! It is by FAR our favorite season and we cannot wait to dive into all of the nuances and exceptional plot points, including moments such as: Emma decides she is glad her parents are here, Emma decides this is all her parents' faults, and last but not least, Emma tri...

For those of you that maybe left Sunday's recap more lost and confused, we present to you: the 'That's What You Missed On OUaT' recap! Short, snappy, and hopefully hits on every major plot point to prepare you are we dive into Season 3. Neverland awaits, and it will be a BAD time!!! We want to hear from you! Email us at winewhineandonce@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram @winewhi...

At last, the long-awaited recap, featuring Locally Famous Matthew Winter and Kei. Is it short? No! Is it helpful? Maybe! Does it clarify anything? Not necessarily! But does it involve crazy theories, hot takes, and more laughter than should be legal? Correct! We want to hear from you! Email us at winewhineandonce@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram @winewhineandonce.

Back by unpopular demand by our listeners, and popular demand by ourselves: the drunk precap! In which we get wildly drunk and do our very best to recount each episode in season 3 with only a one sentence summary to guide us. It's either a recipe for disaster, or our most genius idea. In between the cackling and gasping for breath, you will be privy to quotable moments, including but not exclusive...

We interrupt our end-of-season hiatus to bring you: whatever the fuck this is. Enjoy our rambling thoughts as we go through the Season 2 'bonus features' in preparation for our Season 3 launch! We want to hear from you! Email us at winewhineandonce@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram @winewhineandonce.

We made it to the season finale! Which means we are one step closer to Neverland... terrible. Every cloud has a dull lining, we suppose. But enough about Neverland! We have finale-like things to do! Like finally understand what the Home Office is (maybe) or finally discover what Tamara and Greg's motivations are (maybe) and save Storybrooke from being blown up (maybe!). We just don't know! What we...

We have arrived at the penultimate episode of season 2! And while one might THINK that means things are about to get crazy and exciting...one might be wrong in this case. In what can only be described as a clusterfuck of confusing plot points and motivations, Regina is electrocuted (almost) to death in the name of the Home Office (don't ask! we have no answers for you!), and Baelfire loses his Win...

You know that scene in Pride and Prejudice (2005) where Mr. Darcy walks away from Lizzie and flexes his hand in the most sexually charged way? I dunno. Something about this episode just suddenly made us think of that. Weird!  In a classic Masquerade moment, Regina, our one and only Evil Queen, is transformed into a simple peasant so that Snow White can help her learn the true meaning of Chris...

Finally! We made it to one of the absolute BEST episodes. After weeks of promising it, here we are. We are finally introduced to the one and only scantily clad barfly: Lacey! And aside from just being an iconic queen to begin with (you measure the size of your wine glass with your heart!), Lacey also makes it possible for Rumplestiltskin to be in quite possibly the only healthy relationship he wil...

Hah! You thought you'd seen the last of us! Surprise! After a VERY unplanned hiatus (thanks, Covid!), we're back to cause more mayhem and tomfoolery. And boy, are we coming back to a DOOZY of an episode. Did you know that murder and petty crimes are not in fact the same thing? Great, just wanted to check, because we're 99% sure little miss Murder Margaret does not.  This episode gives us more...

We interrupt the catastrophic news of Cora's murder to bring you: a father/son camping trip in the middle of Maine. Welcome to 1983! That's right, folks. We finally get to see what the curse looked like on the day it was cast. And lemme tell you... it sure doesn't make sense! Is it a time loop? are they aware they're in a time loop? What exactly did Regina want out of her curse? Did she really thi...

We would like to go on record saying that this episode has FAR too much sniffing for both of us. Do what that sentiment what you will. This episode officially shifts one of our main heroes down the path of evil as one Mary Margaret Blanchard literally tricks Regina into murdering her own mother. You know how heroes act? Suuuuper normal. But with a mom like Queen Eva, I guess we can't be all too su...

Don't you just hate it when your mother dies on your birthday and then your mother figure ALSO dies on your birthday, and then you find out your step-mother's mother is the culprit BOTH TIMES? That's it. That's the whole episode. Neal has a secret fiancé, pizza is allegedly delicious, cheesy, and notably honest, and Mary Margaret vows to kill Cora. All in a day's work. It's a BAD time! We want to...

Hey. Hey. HEY! Did you know that Henry is eleven? Well you do now! Because the gremlin child screams it at all of us! And perhaps more importantly, we learn more about how Rumplestiltskin became Rumplestiltskin, the Coward. Hated by many, but not as much as by his wife. Because Milah HATES this man with a deep and burning passion. With little to no explanation, mind you! Oh, and Rumple meets a see...

The Madlibs continue! We wish we had an explanation for this, but we sure don't! See you all next week with a new episode of the show. We want to hear from you! Email us at winewhineandonce@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram @winewhineandonce.

We all love a Little Mermaid moment! Because why not. We borrow plots from everywhere else! In what might be the most convoluted and forced usage of a fairy tale character insert, this episode gives us a wildly ineffective rendition of Jack and the Beanstalk. Though please don't ask us why, we don't know! Along the same lines of things we just don't know, what was Rumplestiltskin's plan? Did he tr...

A brief pause to our usual programming to bring you the one thing that NO ONE asked for: Madlibs- Once Upon a Time Edition! You're welcome. And we're sorry. Both? Both is good. Birdhouses and kisses to you all and we'll see you next week with a rousing new episode! We want to hear from you! Email us at winewhineandonce@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram @winewhineandonce.

For an episode that should in all honesty not include Ruby in the slightest, boy do we get some moments from our favorite boyfriend-devouring wolfgirl! This episode breaks the previously established mold of fairy tale characters being our source material, and officially brings us to the world of Frederick Frankenstein! Aka Whale. Aka we already knew this but now we get more background and flavor. ...

Do you hear that? It's the sound of Lo and Dee SCREAMING at Belle to please have an ounce of self reflection and respect for herself. Babe, if your boyfriend is repeatedly hitting a man with his cane, it's not love, it's insanity. In case you haven't figured it out, episode 11 (The Outsider) is alllll about Belle. And kind of about Hook. And Gold. And a little bit about Prince Phillip. But mostly...

Finally: the answer to why Lo is filled with 'the righteous indignation of 1000 bees'. And by that we obviously mean we will provide very few answer and only more questions! It's how we do things around here. Episode 10 (The Cricket Game, not 'A Game of Cricket', as Dee thinks it should be titled!). Cora and Hook are in Storybrooke, local fisherman is turned into a fish, Regina makes non-poisoned...