Who Am I Really?

Neal’s search didn’t take off until he was 66 years old! He got a DNA kit for his birthday and within months he was in touch with his paternal family. Ohio’s open original birth certificate help him learn his birth mother’s name, but he couldn’t find a single maternal connection during his search. This episode was just about to be wrapped up to go live, when Neal...

Serena told me she had a similar experience to what a lot of adoptees feel, even though she grew up with her birth mother. I’m always talking about empathizing with others, so I wanted to hear her story. Serena told me about her birth on a Native American reservation in Arizona then her mother moving away. She was adopted by her father when he married her mother, but...

Rick’s birthmother relinquished him into foster care where he was terrorized as a toddler. He was eventually adopted around age 6 but always felt like an outsider. At 16 years old he reunited with his maternal family who informed him his mother was institutionalized for paranoid schizophrenia. Their reunion didn’t go at all how he had hoped. When he found his birth father, the man was incarce...

Born in the Panama Canal Zone, Stephanie was adopted by a US military family stationed there in 1961. She was never told she was adopted, but she always knew there was a family secret. When she was 43 years old Stephanie discovered the secret was her own adoption. Because she was born in the Panama Canal Zone, her adoption records were available through a Freedom of information Act reque...

Brittney, from Connecticut, grew up knowing but not closely connected with her biological mother . After a bombshell moment where her mom revealed the truth about her paternal parentage, Brittney felt like she was left to clean up the mess of lies. She was conflicted about searching for her birth father because of her loyalty to her adoptive father. Brittney said she was glad she searched because...

Gabe called me early one morning from Salt Lake City, Utah. Gabe is a black transracial adoptee, and a transgender man from a family and community that didn't know how to talk about who he is as a person. After a tough time coming out to his adoptive family, Gabe's reunion revealed his birth parents' secret that their children had a full blooded brother they hadn't known about. Now, Gabe finds him...

Andrie, who lives in Duluth, Georgia, learned she was adopted as a kid, then started coping with the rejection she felt by making up stories about her birth parents, a habit that carried into adulthood. Searching for her truth, Andrie found her birth father, but has chosen to distance herself from him When she met her birth mother Andrie found a woman she has a lot in common with and whom she says...

Daughter Dee lives in Maryland with me. Dee had a wonderful upbringing in Philadelphia, PA where she was cherished and celebrated on her birthdays. When she was fresh out of college Dee's adoptive mother passed away. Dee learned she was adopted and her world turned into a question mark while mourning. As a late discovery adoptee (LDA), she faced secondary rejection, unanswered questions. And misat...

Samantha, from south Florida, watched her adoptive mother reunite with the son she placed for adoption. Samantha found herself anticipating her own reunion one day, so she decided to take action. When she located her birth mother, she learned the woman was very young when she gave birth, was told to forget about the whole thing and had built walls around herself from the trauma of her youth. Saman...

Emma described her adoption with words and concepts like "purchased", "captor", and "Stockholm syndrome". Those aren't the ideas behind a healthy parent child relationship When she decided to find her birth mother, Emma would not be deterred by the redacted information her case worker gave her, so she took action... illegally, to steal her birth mother's name. In reunion Emma lacked the tools to m...

Rebecca, from Tallahassee, Florida, grew up in a religious home where she was over protected and adoption was not discussed or explored. In reunion, She learned her social worker who helped her placement had remained friends with her birth mother and was able to connect them immediately. Rebecca is the documentarian behind the movie Reckoning With The Primal Wound, a visual exploration of the land...

Carlyn (Kar-leen), from Santa Fe, New Mexico, grew up in a junkyard house in a tough relationship with her adoptive mother. Caryln felt over protected, trapped, and wondering why that was her life. After submitting a DNA test for fun, Carlyn was connected with a biological relative she had never heard of forcing her adoptive sister to finally reveal Carlyn's adoption. The news sent a wrecking ball...

Today you're going to meet candidate for Congress Maxwell Frost who called me from Orlando, Florida. Maxwell is a transracial adoptee who grew up loved and supported. When he found himself at a crossroads in his life, the decision to run for public office are not, he realized he wanted to get some answers about his birth mother and his adoption. Speaking with the woman Maxwell learned about the cy...

This is a special episode of the, Who Am I Really? podcast. My guest today is Pamela Karanova, who first appeared on the show on episode 160, "Stepping Into A Space Of Freedom". She told her story of addiction, thoughts of taking her own life and debilitating depression all in the context of her journey through adoption and reunion. Thankfully, Pam has recovered from much of her life's trauma and...

Lynn, from Danville, Virginia knew she was adopted, but she never knew the secret that hers was a kinship adoption... and she had always known her birth mother. So, Lynn didn't have a reunion as much as a re-introduction to her birth mother through the lens of her true relationship to Lynn. Meeting her birth father, things started off great but the honeymoon faded leaving Lynn confused, but open t...

Donna, from Scottsdale, Arizona, had a condition at birth which meant she was going straight to the hospital before her adoption, insuring her detachment from her birth mother and her future family, until she recovered. When she was a teenager, Donna was cut off by her adoptive father when she got pregnant then placed her own daughter for adoption. In reunion, Donna has found a best friend in her...

Heidi, from Silicon Valley, California, grew up walking on eggshells, crying a lot and "staying small" in her world despite being gifted. She found her maternal family guided by a somewhat famous reunion specialist who helped the reunion along. Heidi says reunion can be weird and awkward for how much time has passed while an adoptee tries to get to know their biological relatives in the present. H...

Jack from Phoenix, Arizona, said as a boy, he was kept separate from his sister who was biologically related to his parents. While he was interested in reunion jack was clearly told his desires were unacceptable. He held off from searching for years only to find later that his birth mother was eagerly awaiting his return. On his paternal side, Jack was met with a wall of protection with the except...

David, from San Jose, CA said when he was a kid he knew he was talented and smart but his gifts didn't seem to measure up to his adoptive parents expectations. When David learned he was adopted the news, left him wanting to find his birth mother rebelling and challenged to control his behavior. In reunion, David found his paternal family, but similar elements of dysfunction in their family and dra...

I'm back for season 11 of the, Who Am I Really? podcast. It's going to be another moving season of open, heartfelt discussions about the adoption experience from people from all walks of life. But before we get to the season, I want to update you on my own journey. Some of, you may know that I lost my adoptive mother Veronica on Friday, September 2nd, 2022. It was the end of a long road for her as...

Bryan Elliott, writer, director, producer, grew up in Southern California feeling under prioritized by his adoptive mother. At an early age, he had ambitions of finding his birth family. After extensive research Bryan called a long list of women only to realize she was among those who had repeatedly told him, "sorry, it's not me." when he called. Maternal secondary rejection was solidified with th...

Lisa, my guest from episode 168, "A Vein of Gratitude" is back to share how her reunion has been in the year since we spoke. Lisa and I chatted the night before Lisa met her birth mother for the first time. The COVID-19 pandemic had kept them apart, so the moment was imminent that they would finally meet. The reunion went well, even though some discussion topics were closed for exploration. Afterw...

Mike, from SoCo, Maine was cruising through childhood until he was told he was adopted. The news shook Mike's confidence in relationships and the aftermath lingered in self doubt, creeping through his personal and professional life. When he found his maternal family, Mike was welcomed in as his sister lamented that they missed so much time apart. Now Mike serves as Chairman of the Board of the Nat...

Singer/song writer Jenni Alpert, aka Cami, my guest from episode 96, is back to share an update on her life with her birth father, Don. Recall Jenni took on her birth nickname Cami and went under cover in the streets of Los Angeles to locate Don who was hiding from the law, using drugs, and living outside. Using the tools in her belt that she'd accumulated throughout her life, Jenni became Don's a...

Singer Song writer Jenni Alpert, commonly referred to by her birth name, Cami had a wonderful life supported by her adoptive parents as she pursued the performing arts. After her adoptive father passed away, she learned that her biological mother had too. Her maternal connections went well over time, but her paternal side remained a mystery. Locating her birth father was one thing… doing reconnais...