Who Am I Really?

Ashley shares her story growing up in adoption and having a positive outlook on her life because she felt she was placed for a reason, living life according to God’s plan. Ashley had two sisters, one adopted, one genetic to her parents but she bonded most over adoption with her lifelong school friend, also an adoptee. She searched off and on for 19 years with periodic focus, but it was a quic...

Ann has an array of experiences from being kidnapped briefly from her adopted family to learning she celebrated the wrong birth date for 22 years. She said she was raised not to question God’s plan in relation to her adoption — so she did so quietly. When she met her biological mother things started out well but turned and remain sour. Fortunately, her birth father’s easygoing...

In Kenneth’s family all of siblings were adoptees, each fostered in their parents home before their adoption were made final. That scenario worked out great for Kenneth, but not so much so for his oldest sister who never bonded with their mother. Seeking reunion, Kenneth carefully approached his half-sister and learned the truth about his brith mother’s institutionalization which le...

Recalling her early family life, Ann said she felt like her parents were sucked into feeling like they had to have a family, and while they were focused on creating a better world in their professional lives, that didn’t necessarily translate to their home life. She always had the feeling her parents cared more about appearances than about who their children were in their uniqueness. Ann soug...

Alisa describes her life as the child of Latvian refugees who escaped the brutality and destruction of World War II. They raised Alisa in the ways of their heritage and while she identifies with her community and her upbringing, she admits she struggled with being an imposter. In reunion, her birth parents had an odd request for her that I’ve never heard before, and that s...

Every day Leslie’s birth mother called the orphanage where she was left for adoption. So when Leslie located her birth mother 30 years ago, then tried again to connect with her six years ago, it was shocking that the woman wanted no contact with her. Leslie’s birth mother left her with no clues about her birth father’s identity, but DNA helped her settle the mystery. It turned out that the closure...

Jennifer had a very happy childhood and always felt special because she was an adoptee; she knew her parents really wanted her. Their family was heavily involved with the Children’s Home Society in Los Angeles where her mother did fund-raising work. Jennifer so appreciated her loving parents for their lifetime of love and support, but as she got older, she had a feeling that she wou...

Today we're going back to Lisa's journey from episode 197 that started this season. When I spoke with her last, she was filled with anxious anticipation for meetings with a paternal cousin, who was also adopted, and then her birth father. In reunion. Lisa got some answers she had been looking for, but those answers just led to more questions. Thankfully, Lisa has found a diamond in the rough of it...

Dr. Ryan Hanlon, Pres. & CEO of the National Council For Adoption shares a special update about the adult adoptee survey. This is the third in a three part series, Profiles In Adoption. If you're an adult adoptee in the U.S. please make time to share your adoption experience on the survey. You can find the survey on the NCFA website. Who Am I Really? Who Am I Really? Website Share Your Story D...

You're about to meet Louise, from central California. Louise was loved by her adoptive family and while she thought about searching for her birth family, she was never brave enough or in the right place in her life to execute a search. After having her son, reunion found Louise. But the timing wasn't right for her to dive in, even though time was of the essence to meet someone very special in her...

Shelby, who lives near Seattle, Washington, grew up loved in adoption, but also in a home broken apart By domestic abuse. When the existence of her sisters was revealed, Shelby felt an urge to find her birth family, but she pushed it way down for many years. In reunion, Shelby found her nuclear family still together. She's had to overcome the sorrows of lost time as she and both of her families pu...

Rachael, who lives in Dover, Delaware, is a transracial adoptee who endured favoritism toward her brother, microaggressions from her adoptive mother, sexual assault and a physical attack. Rachael went behind her parents' back to find her birth mother only to have the relationship cut short. Later, Rachel found her birth father behind bars, but so glad to finally see his little girl again. Rachel c...

Annie, from Auckland, New Zealand is a late discovery adoptee. When she learned that she was adopted the news made her blood run cold. She said her life split into two people: the people pleasing adoptee who wanted to remain in her family and be accepted and the rebellious adoptee who refused to be what others expected. In reunion, Annie found her birth mother had been waiting years for her to ret...

Today you're going to meet Joe, from New Jersey. Joe is a pseudonym for the true identity of my guest who wanted to remain anonymous. Joe didn't want for anything in adoption, but he's never been very open speaking about his adoptee status either. He said his reunions are complex because his paternal side has embraced him connecting with them. But his maternal side has placed roadblocks In front o...

Jillian, from New Jersey, found out she was adopted in her early teen years when she asked a question that lots of kids asked their parents about the time when they were born. What she learned was shocking, but Jillian didn't address her adoption for years until she was over her grief and passed her guilt for wanting to search. Jillian admits that in her adoption reunion she and her birth mother h...

Danielle, from Kirkland, Washington, has always felt love and loyalty to her adoptive family. So when the doors of reunion were thrown open and information started flying at her, she fell flat on her face. Danielle lived a reunion experience so many adoptive people have imagined -- her birth mother IS a celebrity. While that sounds exciting, the speed of their reunion left no space for Danielle to...

Amy, from outside of Chicago, grew up looking visibly different than her family in a way that didn't meet societal stereotypes for her family's beliefs causing her to have to explain her adoption more than she might've liked. Curious about her ethnicity and background Amy found links to her birth family through DNA. In her maternal reunion, Amy found her birth mother's family shares many of her cr...

Laurie, from Washington state, grew up as an emotional child crying frequently, but no one ever asked what was wrong? They simply wrote her off as being sensitive. When Laurie's adoptive sister was found by her birth mother, Laurie was shocked at how much they looked alike and it ignited her desire to search. In reunion, Laurie's birth mother was very open with every question Laurie asked, but she...

Pippa, from California, Pippa grew up in a wonderful Irish family where she and her brother were supported and loved. When her brother's birth mother found him, it catalyzed Pippa's desire to return to Ireland to find her birth family. In reunion Pippa found a birth mother who had suffered a lot of loss in her young life, a birth father whose alcohol consumption made her uncomfortable, and, when i...

Growing up in Leah’s home everyone was comfortable with adoption. Her adopted mom is an adoptee, and her two siblings are adoptees, though they are biologically related to one another. The kids were made to feel special because her parents chose them. But no matter how much love an adoptee receives, sometimes knowing that their origins are with another set of parents can fuel undeniable desir...

I think of Pam, from outside of Richmond, Virginia, as a late discovery adoptee who learned she was adopted when another child spilled the tea. Speaking with her adoptive mother about the news she was adopted, Pam learned that she was supposed to be placed temporarily, not adopted into another family. Pam's reunion journey has multiple twists and turns as she grew up in the town where she was born...

Lisa and I connected right before she was going to meet her biological father for the first time and a cousin she's completely enamored with. Lisa shared that she was adopted as an infant into a failing marriage where divorce soon followed. While other people outwardly noticed how different she looked from her brother, she considered him, her brother, no matter what, despite her status as an adopt...

Rob called me from right here in Maryland. Trigger warning. Rob shares his harrowing story of his childhood surviving, mental and sexual abuse under the guardianship of his parents. After their deaths Rob went into foster care and became homeless, navigating life with his belongings shuttled from place to place in trash bags. Rob fought hard but struggled to overcome the trauma of his life until h...

In her adopted family Tameko’s parents just assumed that as an adoptee, she was misbehaving, but when her older adopted brother showed up he actually started framing her for terrible things, trying force her out. Even worse, he abused her. On her search, she read a description of her birthmother that humanized her, but the first pictures Tameko saw online documented the hardeni...

Ashley had one of those moments where talking to her biological sister felt so familiar it was like texting and and responding to herself.  But her birth mother’s pain and uneasiness over Ashley’s desire to learn anything about her birth father was too much for the woman, and their relationship suffered. When she found her birth father Ashley, predictably, learned that he didn’t kno...