Warped

Hop on board the USB Enterprise where we voyage in search of an ideal companion and a tall Ferengi. Some of the crew need to excuse themselves to Holodeck 4 halfway through the episode, but it's clear that Riker has just been in there and no one has had a chance to tidy up. This episode raises some serious questions about free will, but the two things we can draw from our experience is that we sho...

Here we are part 2 of our holiday special. See you got one late and one early, how generous are we. Plus you get to listen to us talk about what Matt calls "the worst episode of Star trek The Next Generation". It's a good one! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I bet you thought we forgot about you.  But know we just took this holiest of holidays as a chance to have some fun.  So we released the episode a little late, we couldn't help ourselves.  So sit back, light up and listen to Wesley's return. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

And the final present this holiday season. a glimpse at exclusive Patreon patron content. If you like what you hear think about subscribing. We have several pieces of bonus material, and you get early access to episodes. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's one of the best episodes of Star Trek ever.  It's Shawn's favorite.  It's Cause and Effect!!!!!  The crew is jazzed for this one (well most of the crew...looking at you May).  In this episode we learn some interesting things about Beverly's nighttime routine.  We also think she might be an alcoholic.  Between this week and last we also think poker brings out the...

This week Star Trek dips its toe into the muddy waters of gender. Is it progressive for 1992...sure, does it slam the door shut on the conversation... of course. But we give it full marks for trying. We also ponder why Worf has to be sexist and kinda homophobic? We also think this episode would be super cringe if it were Geordi instead of Riker. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info...

In this weeks episode we take on Star Trek's opinions on euthanasia.  Being as subtle as as a jackhammer, per usual.  But we suffer through so we can give you things like Philippe's porn name.  And is you listen to this episode we are going to sign an NDA for the billion dollar idea we have...ah never mind it's phone booths!!!!! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more inform...

In this week's episode we set a record for most crew members who have watched the show (if you happen to know whether that's true or not email us at warpedthepodcast@gmail.com). We learn that Phillipe should NOT watch the episodes, he just gets mean. Whatever it's a fun romp with Brent Spiner getting to show is chops and Marina Sirtis phasers a bunch of people. Sit back and enjoy. Hosted on Acast....

The Enterprise crew loses their memories and we lose our friggin' minds. It's a small crew again but we're here for the crazy. Data as a bartender...check. Worf thinks he's captain because of his sash...check. Riker getting booty...DOUBLE CHECK!!!! But now let's get down to some serious talk, opossum news is getting dark. I mean it's one of our favorite bits but the news stories recently have been...

This weeks episode is missing some key ingredients but we added something very surprising to the recipe...ERIN WATCHED THE EPISODE!!!!!!!! Alright everyone calm down or you will hyper ventilate. Are you ready to proceed or you need a sec. Ok now since she watched I let her describe the episode. "For a planet based around eugenics they sure didn't breed anyone with a sense of fashion." Woo howdy is...

Coming in hot this week, Matt has some controversial opinions about the ship's counselor. But then we settle into a warm conversation about Fonts and all is right with the world. That's right Fonts. We talk about Fonts for 20 minutes. Fonts. FONTS!!!!!!! Are we effing crazy. Like a fox (or more like possum). Finally Matt mixes up Elf and Alf and confuses the hell out of everyone. Hosted on Acast....

Things Phillipe loves: Jodie Foster. Things Phillipe doesn't like: Speech patterns of androids. On this weeks Warped you learn these things plus, Do hairbrushes in the future come pre-gelled? and was the Enterprise built on an Native American burial ground. Plus a deep dive into the American Music Awards from 1992. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

All together now!!!!!! Baby Worf do doo doo doo Baby Worf Do doo doo doo That's right its the return of Alexander (with the legend Brian Bonsall this time).  But not only is it the return of Alexander, more importantly its the return of....THE CHAIR!!!!!!!! We also get to hear Shawn pronounce Klingon months and the word honor a feww hundred times. Warped presents New Ground Hosted on Acast. S...

We're finishing up the last movie for the original series cast and we send them off with a banger, which we think is a secret Thanksgiving movie (look out internet we've got the next "Is Die Hard a Christmas movie?" for you to unpack. We find out Imdb voters don't know s**t (we already knew that). Ally Sheedy wrote a children's book (we didn't know that). Where is Springfield on The Simpsons (nobo...

Most of you know we watch the episode (or movie in this case) while we record.  And we watch with the closed caption on.  But did you know HBO Max has a slew of options when it comes to closed captions appearances!!!  Well listen to this episode and you will.  Otherwise this is Shawn's favorite original series movie so its got that going for it.  Enjoy Hosted on Acast. See...

There's time in the title so you know time is going to be an issue. While we slog through the grating performance of Matt Freuer, we try to figure out "is he most famous for being Max Headrom?" We then try to describe what Max Headrom is and fail miserably. Something about a Coke commercial, whatever did you know Robin Williams was suppose to play the part? We answer that question and ponder how h...

The Warped crew is back for Part 2 of Spock actually shows up this time. So we're pretty excited. Matt's so excited he brings back not 1 but 2 of his favorite bits. We figure out the Vulcan version of "Schwing" on their "Wayne's World". And most important we figure out what you call Data when he uses robot powers to break the rules of the show. All this and more on Unification II Hosted on Acast....

Happy New Year !!!!!! I know we've been away for awhile but we are starting the new year off right. We are bringing you the most exciting thing to happen to nerds in 1991...The Return of Spock. That's right we are watching Unification I. Matt tells the story of his young nerd heart being filled with anger when Mr. Spock only shows up for 2 seconds at the end of the episode. So since not much happe...

Hello Warpies, (trademarked name for our fans) just a quick heads up this will be our last post of 2022. New episodes coming in 2023. We appreciate your patience this year and look forward to giving you all the eat feels next year we love you signed the Warped Crew Context is King as we explore the mysterious world of Sha Ka Ree (is that Sean Connery?) It's a deep dive into favored nations contrac...

Once upon a time, a person made a movie, and then wrote a book about that movie describing all the things that went wrong, none of which were his fault. I'm not naming names. It's a blockbuster episode for a blockbuster(?) movie this week as we continue our deep dive into Star Trek V! Matt reads Shatner's book while Minh reads Isaac Asimov! Shawn crushes both the box office game and only connect!...

We ignore Shawn's muffled cries from the closet so we can bear down, finish this flick, and enjoy the generation of Star Trek that we so richly deserve. We join Kirk for a dinner with some terrible breadsticks. The most important lesson from this half of the film: stop dating guys who live at the park. Serious red flag. We express our gratitude that someone has taken it upon themselves to up Cheko...

It's the one with the whales! Shawn is out on vocal rest for the next couple weeks, so we fall right into the warm embrace of the sofa crack left in his absence. Erin is plugged into the pulse of 1986 and nails Box Office Trivia to the wall. We mark the farthest and fastest falls from grace in recent memory and salute the production designer who slam dunked the easiest job of his career. Minh plie...

Repeated visits to the craft services table means we're going to need a bunch of alterations made to our crew uniforms over the course of the podcast. We explore the dangers of synthol. It's only logical that Spock would employ his epic 3D chess-inspired machinations to achieve a pon farr session that lasts his entire adolescence. Erin is experiencing the third part of her trilogy of emotions abou...

Welcome to part one of the second movie in the Genesis trilogy, or as the common folk refer to it: Star Trek III. Now that all ambiguity has been removed, please send your thoughts and prayers to aid us in sufficiently patching together Matt's audio with the reused bubblegum and yarn that holds this show together. Matt demotes James Doohan during Corrections Corner, and goes to bat for Kirstie All...

We're back with the second half of The Wrath of Khan and NOBODY IS WATCHING THE DAMN KIDS! Listen to our Sex and the City reboot ideas, and join us for the pilot episode of Golden Guys, premiering much sooner than we'd like to admit. I know this show can be confusing sometimes, but just remember to tell yourself that "they're doing a thing" and it will all start to make sense. You can come see Jak...