Unfiltered: Real Talk About Sex & Love

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: After discovering my husband’s long-hidden porn addiction and affair, my adult children and I are struggling to reconcile his deep involvement in faith and ministry with the secret double life he lived for decades. I don’t know how to explain the discon...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: After five years of betrayal and partial recovery efforts, I’m seeing new honesty and engagement from my husband, but repeated slip-ups leave me unsure what’s truly changing. I’m caring for myself well, yet struggling to discern whether this reflects ea...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: After 16 years of recovery from sex addiction, I’m realizing how deeply my relationship with my mother still shapes my emotional triggers around criticism, guilt, and performance. While our relationship has improved and I truly believe I’ve forgiven her...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love, with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: I resonated with your thoughts on marriage stagnation from episode #95. My husband stopped relapsing but isn’t actively pursuing healing, and I feel stuck, discouraged, and worn down. After years of little growth, I’m unsure what I believe about biblical...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: My husband and I are 2½ years into recovery, and our marriage is stronger than ever. As I enter my third trimester, we want to plan for sex and intimacy postpartum, especially after a difficult recovery with our first child. How can we approach this sea...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: I’m a woman in ministry and I’ve noticed a pattern where I seek validation through flirting and attention from men, even when I don’t intend harm. I want to break this cycle and grow in healthier boundaries and identity. What kind of help, support, or p...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: My husband and I have been together since childhood, married for 7 years, and six months ago I discovered his long-term porn addiction. It feels like a deep betrayal, and I’m struggling to heal and trust again. Even though he’s in recovery and doing the...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love, with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: - I’m walking through betrayal after discovering my boyfriend’s porn use and past behaviors, and what’s been most overwhelming isn’t just the pain, it’s the rage. At times, I feel completely overtaken by anger, even acting in ways that scare me and leave...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love, with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: - I’m single, in a healthy community, and feel ready for a relationship, but I tend to quickly imagine men as “the one” before truly knowing them. I find myself dreaming about a future instead of seeing who they really are. Why is this so hard to stop, a...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: I’ve found myself using sexual fantasy or porn-like material to cope with stress or loneliness. I’ve heard that these behaviors can be a sign of unmet needs rather than simply a sin issue. How do I figure out what need I’m trying to meet and what could...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: After 22 years of marriage marked by pornography addiction, emotional abuse, fear, and deep violations of trust, I’m emotionally done and longing to begin my own healing. My husband’s serious health issues now complicate my decision and leave me burdene...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: After years of recovery work and shared ministry, I’m facing renewed betrayal as my husband returns to secretive, addictive behaviors, becomes defensive and angry, and dismisses my need for safety. I feel destabilized, fearful there may be more hidden,...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: Listener feedback: I have gone through Unraveled and am currently starting a Betrayal & Beyond group at my church. Going through Unraveled was so amazing to help me process things and have a safe group of women that I could be honest with. Thanks so muc...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: I recently found out that my husband has been hiding a 7 year porn addiction which is most of our marriage. I am 5 months pregnant and we had planned for him to take 12 weeks paternity leave. Now I am really concerned that it may not be a good idea, as...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: Despite years of counseling and recovery efforts following discovery, I’m exhausted by repeated delays in my husband’s full disclosure. I’ve set a February deadline to protect my well-being but feel uncertain about boundaries, patience, and enabling pat...

In this insightful conversation, we sit down with a clinician and ministry leader, Dr. Craig Cashwell, who is passionate about integrating psychological wisdom with spiritual formation.  We explore how faith and clinical care work together in the healing process and unpack the powerful statement, “Nothing that is psychologically damaging is theologically sound.” You’ll gain a clearer understanding...

In this vulnerable and transparent episode, Cyndie and Dusty share their story of betrayal, discovery, and the courageous steps that led them to seek help.  Dusty offers the often unheard perspective of a husband navigating betrayal trauma, including the physical, emotional, and spiritual impact and how he pursued recovery. Cyndie talks about joining an Unraveled group: what was challenging, what...

In this honest and compassionate conversation, we explore one of the most difficult realities couples may face: when separation, and sometimes divorce, becomes part of the healing journey. How can someone discern when it’s time to consider divorce? What boundaries protect emotional and spiritual health along the way?  We also discuss caring for children through the transition, navigating reactions...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: I’m terrified that full honesty will cost me everything—my marriage, my family, my reputation. I want healing, but I’m afraid the truth might do more damage than good. Do I really need to tell my partner everything—and what if it destroys my marriage? I...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love, with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: - We are 5 years post betrayal and our intimacy has gotten better and deeper. Though there are still barriers around me achieving orgasm. It took us 2 years for me to orgasm. It’s very separated right now, either I am orgasming or he is. We want to do it...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: After 37 years of marriage marked by sexual betrayal and addiction, my husband left for another woman, leaving deep trauma and guilt in his wake. I wrestle with regret, self-blame, and grief after years of prayer and perseverance. How do I heal from thi...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: Why do I keep going back to porn or affairs even when I genuinely want to stop? I’ve prayed, made promises, installed accountability, and genuinely meant it—yet somehow I still find myself back here. Each relapse leaves me more confused and ashamed, won...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: Nearly two years after betrayal and decades of marriage, I’m trying to coexist with a husband in recovery who seeks help but struggles to empathize with my pain. I feel unseen, fearful of being on my own, and unsure whether healing together is possible....

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: I’ve been married twenty years and have lived with the quiet pain of my husband’s porn use, avoidance, and lack of accountability. I’ve pursued healing alone while he remains passive, leaving me stuck between guilt, anger, and resentment—especially amid...

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love , with Ashley and Heather. On today’s episode, we answer the following questions: My husband’s past pornography addiction and my own history of sex and love addiction make occasional new sexual behaviors triggering for me. When something unexpected happens, I feel unsafe and disconnected. We want to keep exploring intimacy without ac...