UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone

You’ve hit the milestones: the degree, the dream job, the relationship that looks right on paper. But no matter how much you achieve, that deep sense of confidence still feels out of reach. That isn’t because you’re missing something; it’s because we’ve all been taught to think about confidence the wrong way. Tune in this week to discover what The Confidence Compass is and how it brings together e...

You’ve done the therapy, read the books, and gained awareness, but the same anxious thoughts still run the show. This week’s Coaching Hotline episode dives into why understanding your patterns isn’t enough to change them and what’s really required to create lasting emotional shifts. I help one listener who’s been through years of therapy without relief and another who’s stuck chasing validation af...

Most people think confidence is just about feeling good about yourself, but that is only the beginning. In this episode, I am revisiting one of the most important concepts I have ever taught: what true confidence actually is, and what it is not. When you stop thinking of confidence as a fleeting feeling and start seeing it as a mindset and a relationship with yourself, everything changes. Listen i...

In this week's Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions that get to the heart of managing our emotions and taking action despite resistance. The first listener struggles with guilt when their actions unintentionally cause someone they love pain. The second listener is trying to build a consistent thought work routine, but often doesn’t feel like doing it and avoids the work. Throu...

Confidence doesn’t come from promotions, degrees, or other people telling you that you’re impressive. In this episode, I revisit one of the earliest conversations on the podcast to break down the myths about where confidence comes from and why relying on external validation alone never works. You’ll learn why starting with your past accomplishments is helpful but not enough and how the deeper work...

Other people are going to make choices you don’t agree with - your partner won’t go to therapy, your family says things that clash with your values, your friends act in ways that frustrate you. The real question isn’t how to change them - it’s how you’re going to show up for yourself when faced with choices you don’t like. In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions that get...

Friction feels annoying, stressful, and uncomfortable, but it is also where real growth happens. In this episode, I show you how to stop avoiding discomfort and start using it to build confidence, resilience, and stronger connections. You’ll learn why your brain resists effort and failure, how to reframe frustration as progress, and simple ways to practice tolerating and even seeking out productiv...

We spend so much time telling ourselves how other people should act and it keeps us frustrated, anxious, and stuck. In this week's Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions that expose this trap. One caller is constantly angry about her partner’s availability, the other worries that her friends aren’t putting in as much effort as her. Both show how our expectations about how others...

Ever feel like you’re constantly giving love, safety, or approval away, but never getting enough back? Today’s guest is Bea Albina, author of the brand-new book End Emotional Outsourcing: How to Overcome Your Codependent, Perfectionist, and People-Pleasing Habits . We’re breaking down emotional outsourcing, the habit of looking outside yourself for validation, and how it secretly shapes your relat...

Ever been told to “just get over it” and felt like it made everything worse? In this week’s Coaching Hotline, I answer a listener who’s struggling with that exact phrase and the pressure to move on before they’re ready. We dig into why vague instructions like this don’t help your brain—and what actually does. I also tackle a question about imagined critics and the way we judge ourselves through fa...

In this Greatest Hits episode, we’re diving into the science behind why coaching works—and why it can completely transform high-pressure careers. I’m revisiting my conversation with Dr. Tyra Fainstad and Dr. Adrienne Mann about their groundbreaking research, published in the Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA) , and how structured coaching can change not just individual outcomes, bu...

Do you ever feel like you're chasing future happiness—only to miss out on the joy of right now? That nagging feeling that you should be doing something else or preparing for what’s next keeps you stuck in a loop of dissatisfaction. In this week's Coaching Hotline episode, I’m answering two questions about being present and actually enjoying life, instead of endlessly striving for the next goal. I...

Ever felt that gut punch when you see someone else living the life you want? Maybe they’ve landed your dream job, bought your ideal house, or achieved the business success you’re chasing. It feels awful—like proof that you’ll never get there. In this episode, I’m showing you how to turn those painful feelings of envy and comparison into fuel for your own growth. You’ll learn the two key questions...

In this week's Coaching Hotline episode, I’m answering two listener questions that get right to the heart of emotional responsibility. First, I tackle the studies on mood contagion you’ve probably seen—and show why they don’t actually contradict thought work. The second question digs into a classic relationship trap: knowing when to share your feelings with a partner and when you’re actually tryin...

What if the reason you haven’t reached your biggest goals isn’t lack of talent or effort—but the illusion that you need a perfect plan before you even start? In this episode, you’ll learn why chasing certainty keeps you stuck, how overplanning can become a sophisticated form of procrastination, and why the “next right step” is more powerful than a five-year roadmap. You’ll discover how to set goal...

Ever catch yourself overthinking how you show up around men—or in any situation where you feel judged? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener’s question about maintaining platonic friendships while married and unpack why women are socialized to take responsibility for other people’s thoughts—a burden that’s impossible to carry and doesn’t belong to you. Then we dive into whether som...

The coaching industry is booming—yet it’s one of the most misunderstood professions out there. From concerns about pyramid schemes to questions of legitimacy, there’s a lot of confusion surrounding this coaching, especially in a field that’s predominantly female and largely online. So this week, I’m breaking down the most common myths and concerns about becoming a coach. I cover everything from st...

In this week’s Coaching Hotline, I answer two listener questions that reveal a common trap: we think circumstances create our feelings, when really our thoughts are doing all the work. One caller worries that ambition has become a perfectionist trap, the other wonders if meditation is just a way to avoid difficult emotions. I break down how to tell if meditation is actually processing emotions or...

Ever feel like you’re constantly trying to be the perfect friend, partner, coworker, or mom? That pressure to live up to everyone else’s expectations is a trap—and it’s keeping you stuck in self-sacrifice and people-pleasing. In this episode, I’m chatting with Elise Loehnen, author of On Our Best Behavior, about how we can stop chasing the impossible standard of “goodness” and start embracing our...

In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two relationship questions—one about wanting more time with your partner, the other about lingering anger when your needs feel unmet. Both reveal the same underlying problem: telling yourself you should feel differently. You’ll learn how to explore your anger and anxiety without adding guilt or shame. Plus, I show you how thought work can be used to get o...

Do you ever feel like you shouldn’t be giving advice, leading a project, or stepping into your own expertise because you’re not perfect—or not perfect enough ? That’s expertise perfectionism —the constant self-doubt that tells you your knowledge isn’t enough and that every mistake means you’re failing. In this episode, I break down how to spot and release expertise perfectionism, why perfection is...

In this Coaching Hotline episode, I tackle two powerful questions about self-acceptance and purpose. The first caller is a mom grappling with balancing acceptance of her son's autism and advocating for his needs. The second is struggling with perfectionism, confusion about her work, and quitting projects before they gain traction. Tune in to hear how to stop tying your identity to external outcome...

Ever feel like you're just waiting for your purpose to magically appear, fully formed and ready to give your life meaning? The truth is, purpose isn’t something you find—it’s something you create. In this episode, you'll hear how purpose develops over time through small steps driven by what excites you, rather than a grand revelation. Discover how purpose isn’t a fixed destination—it’s about trust...

Ever notice how your brain immediately pushes back when you try to change those old, deeply ingrained thoughts? It feels like proof you’re doing it wrong—but actually, that resistance is exactly what should happen when you challenge those patterns. In this Coaching Hotline episode, I dive into two powerful questions—one about creating new goal thoughts when nothing feels believable, and another ab...

What if the key to your success isn’t in playing it safe, but embracing the discomfort of going after what you really want? In this Greatest Hits episode, I’m revisiting a powerful conversation with my dear friend and fellow master coach, Brenda Lomeli. Together, we discuss the courage, belief, and determination it takes to go after big goals—no matter the odds or the fear of failure. Brenda’s jou...