Two Assholes and a Mic

Send us Fan Mail In S2E33 , we start off with a slightly cursed intro before getting into Robby’s plan to finally get the Slingshot picked up and looked at, Ian having one of those disconnected “don’t want to deal with anything” days, and a heavier detour into crime stories, scams, and why people can be absolute trash sometimes. From there, we lighten things back up with Robby offering to send ove...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E32 , we start off sweating through another round of Texas garage heat and UK weather talk before Robby gives an update on finally selling the trailer and getting the Slingshot lined up for a tow, repair, and possible sale. From there, Ian drops the big news that the house contract has finally arrived and been signed, which leads into the usual comparison of how painfully slo...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E31 , we bring on our old friend Chance Cunningham and catch up on life after the Air Force. We talk about Chance retiring out of Fairchild, getting medically retired after 21 and a half years, rolling straight into his VA rating, and what it feels like to finally collect the retirement we all beat ourselves up for. From there, we get into kids, college, GI Bill benefits, CCA...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E30 , we kick things off with Ian sweating through the UK heat with no AC while Robby enjoys his precious American cooling. From there, we get into the latest mystery with Kirstie’s car, diesel particulate filters, oil dilution, check engine lights that disappear at the worst possible time, and why modern cars are a pain in the ass. We also talk Slinky getting attacked by sti...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E29 , we start with Robby showing off a new Sonic LEGO set, Knuckles, Rogue, dual-molded minifig legs, and whether custom 3D-printed LEGO figs are actually a thing. From there, we get into Robby’s bar schedule, learning drinks, wine pours, being a “15% handicap” behind the bar, Ian accidentally calling a coworker the wrong name, Uncle Buzz, LEGO reward points, gift cards, kid...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E28 , we kick things off with full dad-mode chaos, dog hair everywhere, and Slinky demanding attention like usual. From there, we get into Slinky’s stinky feet, dogs sweating through their paws, baby teeth, Roxy trying to sit on Robby, USA versus Australia, clogged “tobacco” carts, pipe cleaners, future podcast guest ideas, becoming a better parent with age, Autumn’s online a...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E27 , we start with Slinky getting seeds and eye goop picked out, Robby waking up in full existential “what am I doing with my life” mode, and Ian talking about the problem with wanting a relaxing “tobacco” morning when you still have places to be. From there, we get into Robby’s chaotic Wing Wednesday shift, the many versions of his name at work, UK office heat with no AC, t...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E26 , we kick things off with Slinky, Roxy’s heavy-breathing ass, and Robby showing off his ridiculous Toy Story-themed nails. From there, we get into LEGO pop culture figs, Venomized characters, missing pieces, Batgirl parts that have to stay with Willow’s collection, and somehow end up talking about whether riding on the back of a garbage truck would be fun for about a week...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E25 , we start with Slinky covered in stickers, dog hair everywhere, and Robby debating whether Slinky’s “newts” need to go after he marks one of the LEGO boxes. From there, we talk about brushing Slinky and Roxy, Roxy’s guard-dog energy, bite strength, and how weirdly gentle she gets when taking treats. The episode then shifts into Ian’s ongoing Range Rover nightmare, includ...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E24 , we start off talking about online Goodwill LEGO lots, giant pallets of mystery bricks, Robby’s day running around with Autumn, and Kirstie’s birthday plans. From there, we get into Dragon Ball, including Robby’s hatred for the Vegito-inside-Buu episode and Ian getting closer to the Tournament of Power. We also talk rare Atlantis LEGO figs, old Star Trek toys, childhood...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E23 , we bring on Rodney, also known as Cuban Bee, and catch up on life after the military. We talk about his move to Florida, retiring in 2023, getting his A&P, teaching aviation maintenance, buying a dream home, and raising two young kids after spending the first decade of marriage travelling and enjoying life. From there, we get into old crash recovery memories, the ca...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E22 , we bring on our old Misawa coworker and friend, Josh, to catch up after years of not talking. We get into Josh’s retirement life, small-town Arizona living, the opportunity to take over a machine shop, and how machining heads and building engines scratches that old maintenance itch without all the military bullshit from above. From there, we talk about missing the satis...

Send us Fan Mail In S1E21 , we fight through another round of technical difficulties, audio delays, reconnecting issues, and Ian’s car trying to hijack the Bluetooth mid-recording. Once we finally get rolling, we talk watermelon flavors, Robby’s LEGO zombie Captain America build, weird word mix-ups, missing LEGO parts, Joy’s legendary pronunciations, Brooke becoming the cat whisperer, and whether...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E20 , we start by talking through the joys of recording issues, missing audio, Bluetooth problems, and the mystery of why some spam calls kill the track and others don’t. From there, we get into missing LEGO pieces, memories of Joy, Brooke becoming the cat whisperer, whether cats are useful house tools, overly happy coffee shop workers, and why Green Bean coffee downrange sti...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E19 , we start with Ian passing his UK driving theory and hazard perception test, including why the hazard section feels odd when you’ve already been driving for years. We also talk about Kirstie getting back into work, Ian helping out at the Suffolk Show with science activities for kids, and then go off on a run of random movie quotes from Joe Dirt , Anchorman , and Talladeg...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E18 , we talk through Robby redoing the Mustang shocks, helping with an oil change, and the never-ending debate between keeping things old-school or upgrading to coilovers. Ian recaps a packed beach day, a failed attempt at metal detecting, and a new tattoo idea involving Ultra Instinct Goku, Ultra Ego Vegeta, anime panels, and space-themed designs. We also get into LEGO side...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E17 , we get into Ian forgetting to charge his smoke setup, Robby dodging another day of work, and the questionable origins of drinking beer from a boot. From there, we debate breaded versus naked wings, talk beard maintenance in the heat, check in on Ian’s mailed package, and spend a healthy amount of time discussing Roxy, Slinky, dog farts, guard-dog behaviour, and why watc...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E16 , we get into Robby selling off some of his LEGO collection, Ian’s house purchase and plans to hammer down the mortgage, and whether a five-pound steak challenge is actually doable. Along the way, Kai drops into the conversation, we talk family life, hard water, housework, legal weed, Ian’s productive day at work, Robby’s never-ending Mustang repairs, and one fly that ref...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E15, we kick things off with Robby’s garage run-in with a rattlesnake and Slinky’s questionable attempt to claim the kill. From there, we get into gas prices and the proposed federal gas tax suspension, remember the freedom of riding bikes everywhere as kids, talk LEGO side hustles, APO shipping restrictions, and finish with an update on Ian’s house purchase—and Robby’s very...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, we bounce from garage smoke, bong mishaps, and random weekend plans into a surprisingly real conversation about retirement, Social Security, taxes, and whether people should catch a break after working their whole lives. We also get into insurance headaches, hail damage, car plans, mystery construction next door, missed Wing Wednesday, future road trips, and the u...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E13 , we bring on Niko, aka Bean , and get into life after the military, work travel, living out in Georgia, raising ducks, and trying to balance a normal life with expensive car habits. We bounce through gas prices, EV frustration, Supras, GTR dreams, daily drivers, home projects, and the usual random turns into property, animals, retirement plans, and figuring out how much...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E12 , we bring on our friend and former coworker John Sweeney for a catch-up on life after the military. We get into retirement not going quite as planned, ending up back in management, running a gym, family plans, VA education benefits, moving after the kids are grown, and the usual random turns into chickens, goats, property taxes, drinking, and “time travel” stories. It’s...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E11 , we start off catching up while Robby is making the long drive from Texas to Oregon, talking trucks, tuners, dry lake beds, road fatigue, and the kind of random back-and-forth that comes naturally with us. Around the 10-minute mark, the audio has other plans, so the episode turns into a rougher, more one-sided ride than we intended. It’s a little glitchy, a little cut of...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E10 , we bounce from storm weather and tornado watches into dog drama, parking lot stupidity, eyebrow waxing, government surveillance, and the usual completely normal turns our conversations take. We get into Slinky escaping the gate, whether backing into a parking spot needs a blinker, random news and AI rabbit holes, dog breeds, and the kind of off-the-rails back-and-forth...

Send us Fan Mail In S2E9 , we bounce between storm season, tornado watches, flooded buildings, muddy dogs, and the kind of everyday chaos that somehow turns into a full conversation. We also get into work downtime, mower repairs, overgrown grass, Lego side hustles, whatnot selling, and the weird little routines that make up real life. It’s a laid-back episode full of random detours, backyard nonse...