Turtle Time

As Tom Sandoval and Jax Taylor's birthday trip devolves into a drunken nightmare, Stassi Schroeder comes back into the Vanderpump Rules universe like a powerful beam of pure light. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each we...

Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Riley and Amy discuss Kyle Richards seeing a mouse on her car, TurtleCon 2024, and much more. (00:00 - 26:32) And then they dive into the Vanderpump Rules season 11 reunion part 1 (26:32) and then they give their brief thoughts on The Valley (1:49:46) and Summer House (2:17:53). If you enjoyed this episode, join the ⁠Turtle...

Jax Taylor and Tom Sandoval show the world how two people can have the best birthday trip of all time. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week. And if you need even more Turtle Time in your life, follow us on ⁠TikTok⁠ ...

Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Riley and Amy discuss various fast food deals and stuff that you can buy at Dodger Stadium and then they talk about Lala Kent possibly becoming a cast member on The Valley (00:00 - 8:40) And then they dive into the Vanderpump Rules season 11 finale and dissect it like nothing you could ever imagine (8:40) and then they give...

Stassi Schroeder has been seen skulking around SUR waiting for the perfect time to reclaim the group that she forsook. But she'll have to sit down with Lisa first... If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week. And if you...

Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Riley and Amy discuss the film Challengers, Something About Her officially opening, Vanderpump Rules being put on pause, Riley's wife being put on the witness stand to defend Ariana Madix in the court of law against Rachel Leviss, and much more! (00:00 - 38:14) And then they dive into the latest episode of Vanderpump Rules...

Amy and Riley discuss Vanderpump Rules season 4, episode 10 - "No Strings Attached" - in which Jax and Lala decide to flirt with each other to an almost unfathomable degree, and Tom Schwartz pulls off an elaborate proposal at Rock & Reilly’s. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be re...

Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Riley discusses going Chili's to get the famous Katie Maloney and Scheana Shay Espresso Martinis, and the Something About Her opening. (00:00 - 22:33) And then they dive into the latest episode of Vanderpump Rules - season 11 episode 13 (25:33), The Valley - season 1 episode 6 (1:56:54), and then Summer House - season 8 epi...

Instead of cheating on their girlfriends in Vegas, Tom Schwartz and Tom Sandoval decide to get tattoos on their asses to honor their commitment to them. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week. And if you need even mor...

Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss all of the Real Housewives firings and dip into the Bravo Vault. (00:00 - 25:20) And then they dive into the latest episode of Vanderpump Rules - season 11 episode 12 (25:20), The Valley - season 1 episode 5 (1:38:07), and then Summer House - season 8 episode 8 (2:09:16). If you enjoyed this episode, j...

Ariana wants to celebrate her 30th birthday weekend with the person she loves the most, but apparently there's like a huge construction yard in Vegas where you can like crush shit with bulldozers. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the b...

Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss France, Notre Dame, Pirates of the Caribbean, the mid-season trailer of Summer House, and Jax and Brittany's faltering marriage. (00:00 - 32:31) And then they dive into the latest episode of Vanderpump Rules - season 11 episode 11 (32:31), Summer House - season 8 episode 7 (1:18:34), and The Valley - s...

James Kennedy continues his reign of terror upon the Vanderpump Rules universe, and Lisa Vanderpump shares the wonders of SUR Restaurant with 12 homeless teens. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week. And if you need...

Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Jeremy Madix getting engaged and Jax Taylor criticizing Vanderpump Rules. (00:00 - 42:05) And then they dive into the latest episode of Vanderpump Rules (season 11 episode 10), and The Valley (season 1, episode 3). If you enjoyed this episode, join the ⁠Turtle Time Patreon⁠ and become a Villa Rosa VIP...

Lisa Vanderpump planned two perfect parties for Gay Pride and she's expecting everything to run smoothly. But unbeknownst to her, James Kennedy is threatening to ruin everything by showing off all of the sexual-related bites he got after having sex with one of Lisa's employees. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access...

iI's a special episode, little turtle cuties. On this episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Vanderpump Villa (which airs Monday, April 1st on Hulu) and the latest beautiful episode of Summer House (Season 8 Episode 6) Start Your Engines. If you enjoyed this episode, join the ⁠Turtle Time Patreon⁠ and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear exclusive bonus content! We're recapping the Vanderpump Ru...

Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Chicago, Ariana Madix buying a $1.6M home near us, Candiace Dillard Bassett quitting Real Housewives of Potomac and even more than that. (00:00 - 37:27) And then they dive into the latest episode of Vanderpump Rules (37:30), The Valley (02:26:12), and then honor everyone that took the Summer House chal...

Jax Taylor always considered himself the cock of the walk, but there's a new rooster in town - James Kennedy - that is constantly ruffling his feathers. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week. And if you need even mor...

It's Turtle Time After Dark, little turtle cuties! Amy and Riley stayed up late and discussed the latest episode of Vanderpump Rules (season 11 episode 8) and the premiere episode of The Valley. If you enjoyed this episode, join the ⁠Turtle Time Patreon⁠ and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear exclusive bonus content! We're recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week and uncover...

Amy and Riley overcame the Ides of March to bring you this very special recap of Vanderpump Rules. In this episode, Scheana hosts an intervention for her husband, Shay, and also James has a breakthrough in his couples' therapy session with Kristen. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll...

It's a special emegency episode, little turtle cuties. Amy and Riley discuss Summer House season 8 episode 4 and what it means for the future of Lindsay and Carl. If you enjoyed this episode (which we know is probably not the case), join the ⁠Turtle Time Patreon⁠ and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear exclusive bonus content! We're recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week an...

Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss the Oscars, The Valley trailer, Kate Middleton, Rachel Goes Rogue, and Kristen Doute saying she got thousands of dollars from Tom Sandoval on Paypal. (00:00 - 47:51) And then they dive into the latest episode of Vanderpump Rules (53:42) and then they recap the latest episode of Summer House as well. (0...

Scheana Shay lets her friends and Lisa know that she is experiencing some difficult issues in her marriage. But once those issues come to light, will Lisa still be able to start a rivalry between her SUR employees and her Pump employees?  If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be recapp...

Amy and Riley unfortunately had a lot of issues recording remotely this week so the episode quality suffered tremendously. We almost didn't want to put this out, but we thought some Little Turtle Cuties might derive some ironic enjoyment out of seeing how badly things went. Ultimately we thought if we even prompted one smile or laugh it was better than putting nothing out. So sorry for this one, T...

Amy and Riley discuss a haunting scene where Tom and Ariana buy a new couch together. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week. And if you need even more Turtle Time in your life, follow us on ⁠TikTok⁠ or ⁠Instagram⁠. H...