Trashwatch

EPISODE 125 – AN AMERICAN TAIL: FIEVEL GOES WEST   “Jimmy Stewart saying lewd things is strangely off-putting.”   Animal April Begins! This week, Ashley tries to DeLuise laugh; Brandon has bad news re:Cats in America; Brian narrowly avoids a yellow card; and Chris finds his perfect impression.   BTW: Drunken Jimmy Stewart records his lines in his car!   Starring: Phillip Glasser, James Stewart, Er...

EPISODE 124 – HELLBOY (2004)   “This film opens with a problem caused by the way most problems in life are caused: desperate Nazis.”   We’ve been blessed with this heavenly Patron Pick! This week, Chris gets locked in GDT’s closet; Brandon pitches Joe Pantoliano Rasputin; and Brian praises pancakes.   BTW: The Sexy Misadventures of Rasputin!   Starring: Ron Perlman, John Hurt, Selma Blair, Rupert...

EPISODE 123 – MONKEYBONE   “Please, God, may someone be aroused by my arm flaps!”   Chris and Marrett celebrate their recent marriage with… Monkeybone . This week, Brandon writes Sister Act 3 ; Marrett has a cat-girl theory; Brian delights Ashley’s mom; Chris shocks with his weirdness; and Ashley hates this.   BTW: Henry Selick’s Taliban Fanboys!   Starring: Brendan Fraser, Bridget Fonda, John Tur...

EPISODE 122 – FLUBBER   “How do you vacuum drapes?!” “WITH A VACUUM!”   This week, Chris creates a proton pack; Brian makes some flawless edits; Ashley gives a 0-word review; and Brandon threatens a future episode.   BTW: How Flubber saved Good Will Hunting !   Starring: Robin Williams, Marcia Gay Harden, Christopher McDonald, Ted Levine, Clancy Brown, Raymond J. Barry, Wil Wheaton, Edie McClurg,...

EPISODE 121 – BLANK CHECK   “We are weird friends. We’re like, ‘Let’s punish my friends. How dare they be friends with me! I’ll teach them!’”   The boys are on their own to talk Blank Check ! This week, Chris has an odd movie mixup; Brandon talks roller coasters; and Brian reads his notes for THAT SCENE.   BTW: The Ferrer-Postlethwaite Animorphs Spectrum!   Starring: Brian Bonsall, Karen Duffy, Ja...

EPISODE 120 – DRAGONHEART   “Where do you buy gloves for dialogue this heavy-handed?”   This week, Brian says AKAB; Brandon has no time for vengeance; Chris ruins the ending; and Ashley reveals her Sean Connery impression.   BTW: Bowen just doesn’t get it!   Starring: Dennis Quaid, Sean Connery, Dina Meyer, Pete Postlethwaite, David Thewlis, Jason Isaacs, Brian Thompson, and Julie Christie   Direc...

EPISODE 119 – SCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD   “Did Anna Kendrick also date Bill Hader? Is this what you’re saying?” “Yes.” “GIRL, GET IT!”   This week, Ashley is limited to two Succession references; Brandon adds a new Patreon therapy tier; Brian geeks out over his favorite scenes; and Chris looks for the orgasm button.   BTW: The shocking reveal of the next season of Always Sunny !   Starring: Mich...

EPISODE 118 – INTOLERABLE CRUELTY   “God, how many band directors’ daughters are out there named Claire Annette? I feel so bad for them!”   This week, Ashley is proud of her joke; Brian wants the Mrs. Gutman biopic; Chris is barred from giving advice; and Brandon is Sega-sexual.   BTW: A Cricut for Chris!   Starring: George Clooney, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Billy Bob Thornton, Geoffrey Rush, Cedric t...

EPISODE 117 – ROMEO + JULIET   “If Baz Luhrmann directed Catcher in the Rye , it would be so powerful it would somehow bring John Lennon back to life.”   We’re getting Baz-pilled, baby! This week, Brian reveals how Paul Rudd changed film history; Brandon is not allowed to be confident; Ashley vents over a line reading; and Chris yells at Orpheus.   BTW: Pitching our Baz literary adaptations!   Sta...

EPISODE 116 – ROMANCING THE STONE   “I have given off every f***ing vibe I can of someone who just wants to be in PJs, chilling with a cat, not doing much.”   This week, Brandon pitches a new Patreon tier; Chris stars in Evening Primrose ; Brian doesn’t want to be a real man; and Ashley catches the adventure bug.   BTW: The Saga of Danny Dorito!   Starring: Michael Douglas, Kathleen Turner, Danny...

EPISODE 115 – TEAM AMERICA: WORLD POLICE  "When new people try to be my friend, I'm like, 'What's your angle?'" This week, Brandon experiences the horror of Rent ; Chris goes to a radio party; Brian questions dating advice; and Ashley possibly curses next week’s episode.   BTW: M. Emmet Walsh as George Lucas!   Starring: Trey Parker, Matt Stone, Kristen Miller, Masasa...

EPISODE 114 – BIG FAT LIAR "I wanna cheer for little stinkers." This week, Brandon takes down a summer school teacher; Ashley has a “crap”-py ex; Brian nears the podcast singularity; and Chris overanalyzes Mr. Funnybones.   BTW: Nic Cage can steal *our* Declaration of Independence!   Starring: Frankie Muniz, Paul Giamatti, Amanda Bynes, Amanda Detmer, Donald Faison, Sandra Oh, Russell Ho...

EPISODE 113 – YES MAN   “That’s my Kryptonite: patchouli and disappointment.”   This week, Brian explains the film’s critical failure; Brandon learns to swashbuckle; Ashley dishes some field commander gossip; and Chris goes to a nice podcast farm upstate.   BTW: The 300 Mandela Effect!   Starring: Jim Carrey, Zooey Deschanel, Bradley Cooper, John Michael Higgins, Rhys Darby, Danny Masterson, Fionn...

EPISODE 112 – RUN FATBOY RUN  "Ashley, you're allowed to talk about bridges three times, max." New year, same us! This week, Chris prepares for wedding catastrophe; Brian gets a request from Thandiwe Newton; Brandon fears growing old; and Ashley talks bridges (and butts).   BTW: Never let Chris play poker!   Starring: Simon Pegg, Thandiwe Newton, Hank Azaria, Dylan Moran, Harish Pat...

EPISODE 111 – I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER   “I’m sorry, Ashley, that I am not a teen girl from the 90’s!”   Ending the year with another Patron Pick! This week, Ashley is betrayed by our Patrons; Chris makes a new award; Brandon is willing to gamble; and Brian’s bit fizzles out.   BTW: The whole town gets the She’s All That treatment!   Starring: Jennifer Love Hewitt, Sarah Michelle Gellar, An...

EPISODE 110 – BIO-DOME   What the f***, Chris?! This week, Brandon explains our Earth Day responsibilities; Chris shares a wild commercial; and Brian fixes the Buttercup gag.   BTW: The looming specter of Viva Rock Vegas !   Starring: Pauly Shore, Stephen Baldwin, William Atherton, Denise Dowse, Dara Tomanovich, Kevin West, Kylie Minogue, Joey Lauren Adams, Teresa Hill, Henry Gibson, Taylor Negron...

EPISODE 109 – POSEIDON   “This is a slasher film where the killer is a boat.”   This week, Brandon sinks the Edmund Fitzgerald ; Brian enjoys aquatic disasters; Chris goes out for milk; and Ashley gets a yellow card.   BTW: Beware the Hymen Ghost!   Starring: Josh Lucas, Kurt Russell, Jacinda Barrett, Richard Dreyfuss, Emmy Rossum, Mía Maestro, Mike Vogel, Kevin Dillon, Freddy Rodríguez, Jimmy Ben...

EPISODE 108 – FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION   “Ask any improv comedian: Volume equals comedy.”   This week, Ashley reveals her stand-up dreams; Brandon expands the Chipmunk theory; Chris gets stuck in a laundry machine; and Brian steals Ashley’s line.   BTW: Ending all our sentences… in hell!   Starring: Catherine O’Hara, Harry Shearer, Parker Posey, Christopher Guest, Ed Begley Jr., Eugene Levy, Christo...

EPISODE 107 – DAN IN REAL LIFE   “Why are we attacking each other? There’s a movie to attack.”   This week, Brandon wants to get to the pancake factory; Ashley expands the Bechdel Test; Brian can’t handle coke slang; and Chris learns a new cherry trick.   BTW: Our first ever Red Card—but for whom?!   Starring: Steve Carell, Juliette Binoche, Dane Cook, Alison Pill, Britt Robertson, Marlene Lawston...

EPISODE 106 – OPERATION DUMBO DROP   “What if the elephant had gone upside-down?!”   We’re not thankful for this! This week, Brandon gives his Candy Bar Theory; Brian gets a yellow card; Chris enjoys a colonoscopy; and Ashley reenacts The Deer Hunter .   BTW: Never be the Best Friend!   Starring: Danny Glover, Ray Liotta, Denis Leary, Doug E. Doug, Corin Nemec, Dinh Thien Le, Tchéky Karyo, Hoang L...

EPISODE 105 – HOLES  “Smash cut from ‘cow turds’ to racists burning down the schoolhouse!” This week, Brandon puts Chris in a hole; Ashley carries everyone up a hill; Brian clarifies Lazar Wolf; and Chris snatches defeat from the jaws of victory.   BTW: Trout Walker, Fish-Man!   Starring: Shia LaBeouf, Sigourney Weaver, Jon Voight, Tim Blake Nelson, Khleo Thomas, Jake M. Smith, Byron Cotton, Brend...

EPISODE 104 – FOR RICHER OR POORER   “I remember when this podcast used to be about movies.” “WHEN?!?!”   Oops, we recorded in person! This week, Brandon hides the podcast from his therapist; Ashley writes the new Pixar movie; Chris meets Karen Kingsbury; and Brian gets excited at a funeral.   BTW: Give us the Inspector Lester HBO Max miniseries!   Starring: Tim Allen, Kirstie Allen, Jay O. Sander...

EPISODE 103 – THE MAN IN THE IRON MASK  "Yellow means 'slow down', not 'speed up to beat the light.'" This week, Ashley finds a use for a time machine; Brandon enjoys the accent work; Chris doesn’t have to say it; and Brian can hold a cup.   BTW: The long-awaited Depardieu Butt Rating!   Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Jeremy Irons, John Malkovich, Gérard Depardieu, Gabr...

EPISODE 102 – HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL (1999) “No way Eddie’s getting outta this jam… except perhaps by throwing a wicked curveball!” Another October survived, mostly! This week, Ashley faces her greatest torture; Brandon has a Brandon-only problem; Chris finds love and jelly beans; and Brian can’t win Connect 666.   BTW: Add us to the IMDb Trivia!   Starring: Geoffrey Rush, Famke Janssen, Taye Diggs...

EPISODE 101 – WAR OF THE WORLDS (2005)   “You know who’s not beefier than Young Neil? Dakota Fanning.”   This week, Brandon scares Ashley stupid; Chris discovers Ray’s fetish; Ashley remembers skirts over jeans; and Brian defends the ending.   BTW: The Things They Carried (In Cargo Shorts)   Starring: Tom Cruise, Dakota Fanning, Miranda Otto, Justin Chatwin, and Tim Robbins   Directed by Steven Sp...