The Wake Up Call for Lawyers

Is this a world where we can be loving and fearless at the same time, no matter what? I ask myself that a lot. Conditions seem to be conspiring against us right now, don’t they? And yet…. And yet don’t we always have that choice? The choice to be loving, remembering that we’re all in this incredible mess together, and the choice to be fearless, remembering how to speak only the truth, and to speak...

Motive matters. Intention matters. Impact matters. We know that.  And, there are some things mindfulness invites us to consider, and practice, just for the love of it.  Kindness, for the love of kindness.  Generosity, for the love of generosity.  Justice, for the love of justice.  All of these, for the love of one other and the other creatures and our beautiful earth.  Maybe that doesn’t always fe...

Mindfulness never pulls any punches. There’s no leeway when it comes to anger. It’s not that there’s a prohibition against the feeling. That wouldn’t be realistic, or even healthy. But there is, against speaking angry words and acting out of anger.  Instead, mindfulness invites us to solve for anger – “conquer” is the world in the teachings. If we can’t quite yet, then the instruction is to acknow...

Hi, it’s nice to be back. We had an amazing final retreat for our 2026 Mindfulness in Law Teacher Training. What a cohort! Already there are two new Mindful Lawyering courses in U.S. law schools, presentations happening in BigLaw, public interest, immigration, and elsewhere, and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. We couldn’t be prouder of our sixteen courageous new teachers.  Meanwhile today’s ch...

It’s one thing to be passionate about something that might make for a better world. It’s another thing to be passionate about power or wealth or influence. Probably we all have both kinds of passion. I know I do. But if I pay attention, I can feel the difference. In the mindfulness teachings, it’s considered unfortunate to nurture passion for anything that could cause harm. There’s no judgment bec...

What is happiness when there’s so much hate and misery? Hate as in hate, but also hate as in anger, irritation, disparagement, aversion? And misery as in desperation?  And what if these states are contagious? If my response to external hate is to volley right back, aren’t I just perpetuating sorrow? If my response to my own tight heart is to hate myself (or even to quietly chastise, or despair), s...

What else can we do but sit down, if we’re trying to cultivate a settled body and mind? What else can we do but sit down and meditate, quietly, each day, noticing our wild mind and our broken heart?  I wish there was a book or a podcast or even a teacher, to show me another way. Maybe an easier way or at least a quicker one. For sure the good books and podcasts and teachers are wonderful, essentia...

I have a sense of good fortune to know a little about mindfulness. I feel like if everyone knew a little, the world would be a better place. So maybe “Is Mindfulness for Everyone?” is a sneaky question because to me, the obvious answer is yes.  But does everyone agree? No. For sure there are people who feel that paying attention, cultivating kindness, patience, compassion, and generosity, loving e...

The great news about mindfulness is that we’re all working on different things. It’s like the law, or any occupation. It keeps things interesting.   With mindfulness, what this means for me is that at times I’m working on stabilizing my attention. At other times, I’m working on patience or compassion or generosity. There’s always something.  The important thing is to not get caught up in the misun...

Sometimes I think, geez, I’ve done enough work. I don’t need to make any more changes. Been there, done that. And then I bump up against heartache or soreness in my body or anger or a pain in the tutu, as we say in our house. And my reflexive “no!” is right there, and I’m paddling away from the present moment as fast as I can.  But then at some point, if I’m lucky, I remember: stop paddling! “No”...

There are times when I say something harsh or in anger. This feels hard to face and even harder to write, but it’s true – and maybe for you, too. For me there’s relief in facing and naming it. The consequences are also hard to face: the harm I’ve caused, and its boomerang effect. I don’t mean in some cosmic way, but right in that moment: the impatience that results in impatience, the scorn that fl...

There’s such a temptation to treat mindfulness practice as something that’s getting me somewhere. But whenever I do that, I fall short.  Sure, after all these years, I’m a little less reactive and a little happier. My set point has moved, a bit.  But the distance I’ve come in 30+ years is hilariously short compared to the distance to go. Which is why it’s more peaceful, and useful, to remember tha...

I feel like most of us are trying to be good people: kind, caring, well-disposed towards others. So why doesn’t it turn out that way? Why don’t we have the power to simply be like that all the time? The problem may be with our mischievous minds. I don’t know about yours, but my mind is easily seduced by gossip, criticism, complaint, and a whole bunch of other nonsense.  Is this just negativity bia...

I’m great at philosophizing and offering advice about how to be kinder, more compassionate, even wiser. But who am I fooling? My philosophy is theoretical, and honestly, on those topics, what’s anyone’s advice worth? Not much, because no one really wants to follow anyone else’s advice. But we all want to follow examples, especially the examples of people who know what to say, and do, and how, when...

Faith is an old-fashioned word. Maybe its most well-known meaning is religious. But true faith predates religion. Ancient humans had faith in the earth, the animals, the stars.   I don’t know much about that kind of faith, but I do know one thing: that I have faith in my own heart and mind, and in yours. I have faith in our ability to love, and to care, and to see, moment by moment, that we’re all...

It’s astonishingly easy for me to lie. “I didn’t say that, I didn’t mean that, you misunderstood.” “I’m sorry you feel that way,” instead of, “I’m sorry I’ve hurt you.”   I admire people who are honest about their impact and can say, through embarrassment and even shame, “It’s my fault. I see how that hurt you. I’m sorry. How can I make things right?” I admire myself when I’m honest like that, too...

The fool can beloved or not. Beloved fools are open-hearted and cultivate “don’t know” mind. Not-so-beloved fools think they know something, or know better, or are better.   What I can see, so far, is that takes courage and fortitude to watch closely enough, over a long enough period of time (maybe a lifetime?), to see when foolishness is taking a beloved form, and when not. And to be humble when...

It’s one thing to practice and study mindfulness. It’s a great thing. It’s another to act accordingly.  What happens when you’re in the courtroom or conference room or family room? Does your heart stay open, or clamp shut? Is your mind filled with hate, or love? When my heart is shut or my mind is filled (or even tinged) with hate, sadly, I act accordingly. When my heart is open and my mind is fil...

It’s not like we don’t know we’re supposed to do that. It’s not like I don’t know. But it so much easier, maybe even reflexive, to notice the faults of others.  To be fair, it’s also part of legal training: to look for the faults, or the fault lines. To always be on the lookout for what could go wrong, what could blow up, and who could be blamed. What a training. But only a training. Another train...

I notice that far too often, I let my mind run wild. I don’t mean I’m completely undisciplined – I have a meditation practice and you probably do, too. So we’re not completely undisciplined. But I don’t know about you: when I look at the news, my mind tends to run wild. Looking more closely, though, I realize it’s not so much mind running wild, as heart running scared. I see or hear something, and...

My general reaction to those little life lessons, the AFOGs, has not been delight. Instead, I’ve often felt affronted or like I’ve messed up or failed.  I’m starting to see how to meet those lessons a little differently, though: with joy. Which means I have to laugh at myself, and at the ancient, cement-like, internal structures that feel like they kept me safe…and are no longer useful.  Which isn...

It feels supportive to share about what we’ve read or come to understand about kindness and connection. I’m as guilty as the next person of doing that – probably more guilty. Just ask me – I’m happy to share.  But the real wisdom is in walking the walk. If I’m talking about how we belong to one another but in my next move, I’m in a “we/they” conversation, how is that helpful? If I’m not only ackno...

Creating happiness when so much seems to be crumbling before our very eyes – sometimes that feels like a challenge. But what works for me is the moment-to-moment feedback loop.  When I speak and act with goodness, even in conflictual or adversarial moments, the goodness makes me feel happier. Not happier because I’ve given something up – I’m not doing that – I’m standing my ground – but happier be...

Here I am, again, my heart all bound up in some petty dispute. For the millionth time, I see, and feel, tightness, closed-up-ness: this old heart trying to protect itself. It takes so much effort. It feels like I’m shoving an old bureau in front of its door.  But seeing is understanding. Only when I summon the courage to see that the door is closed, the mouth is set, the eyes are no longer soft or...

Sometimes I feel like we take for granted the privilege we have as lawyers, law professors, judges, and mediators. Or that we’re not worthy of our power. Or that I’m not. Because what is privilege if we forget that we’re all in this together, and that everything we say and do, matters? And what is power unless we use it to clarify our minds? Or access, if we don’t remember to first, access our own...