The Susan Winter Show

How can you tell your partner what you need without sounding demanding? What if you're physically attracted to someone with a horrible personality? In these two viewer questions I explain how to effectively communicate your needs by using incentive rather than by demanding, and how attraction occurs (even when it's irrational).

All breakups hurt, but The ‘Honeymoon Phase Breakup' is the most emotionally torturous. It occurs when our love is new and our hopes are at their highest.  We haven't had time to see our mate' s imperfections — so we feel we're losing ‘the perfect partner.'  Here's how to offset the pain and recover your emotional stability.

Sex with your ex is common as you uncoil from your relationship. When is it positive, and when is it negative? Here are the signs that show you where you stand and what move you should make for your wellbeing.

How do you know if they're a hot and cold player, or just a nervous dater? Trust your gut. And decode the signs that clarify if you should walk away or give them another chance.

Desperation and insecurity can ruin any relationship (whether it's yours, or your partner's).  The desperate lover claims that all of the emotional chaos is due to their overwhelming love.  Here's how to discern real love, from the fearful state of insecurity that masks as love.

After breakup, a fight or any kind of hurt your man can quickly go from loving to being cold as ice. We, as women, don't know how to process this. We begin to wonder what's real. Did he ever care? Here's the real story of the male ego in peril and why he shuts down.

In theory, they're the perfect partner.  They check off every category on our ‘list'.  And, we're everything they're looking for.  Why doesn't it happen? Here are some of the reasons ‘looking good' relationships don't take off.

Singles can often feel an overwhelming sense of guilt; guilt for not being partnered and guilt for not caring to be partnered.  Relationships are supposed add quality of life. But what if we already have quality-of-life with our friends and support group? Is that enough?

Is there a way to tell if your mate can make a positive change? Yes. It's born of consistency and desire. Here's the way to know for sure if there's hope for your relationship.

Are you obsessing over someone and can't seem to gain control of your thinking? Here's how to break free from the loop of obsession and gain forward traction in your life.

Balancing give-and-take in a relationship can be a tricky thing. Often times, we tend to get into locked roles. The over-giver feels superior and will be resented by the taker. The taker feels disabled and infantilized and resents the giver. Here's how to get into a balanced flow.

Traditional formats oftentimes fail modern couples — but that doesn't mean you can't stay together. Before you consider breaking up, brainstorm for creative solutions to preserve what works by reconfiguring your romantic design.

What should you do when you've discovered your partner has cheated?  Leaving is a clear choice for many. However, there are other options should you (and your partner) care to salvage your relationship. For more on this topic, check out my feature in Bustle: My Partner Is Cheating On Me — Now What? https://www.bustle.com/p/my-partner-is-cheating-on-me-now-what-50739

Rather than being afraid to love, the better option is to be a good sifter of which partner is worth the risk. Developing our skill of evaluating our prospective mates' disposition and core values will eliminate unneeded heartache. Here's how to do that.

Clarity around what you want is essential for creating a relationship you'll enjoy. If you don't take the reins, you'll have to take what you get. The person with the strongest desire and clearest vision will dominate the relationship.  It might as well be you.

Creating tension is a long-standing dating game that's been used throughout time to reboot a lover's interest. It was a key tactic for courtesans to maintain their patron's interest. Be wise, and learn this game — so that you'll never be destabilized by a desperate (and fearful) date.

Only a heart that's pure in its intention can open the hardest of hearts. The animal inside of us is constantly aware of agendas and games. The only way to hack into another's heart is to check your weapons at the gate.

The person you're seeing is pulling away. What you do depends on what you've already established with them. New connections are handled differently than established relationships. Here's your step-by-step guide.

Here's how to master a passive aggressive partner who blames you for their bad behavior. My offensive strategy counters their turnaround, and frees you from having to defend yourself against their mistakes.

Differences in personality and lifestyle are exciting in a mate... until the very thing that was a plus becomes a negative. Here's how to balance those extremes.

Learn the incredible power of playing full out in all your romantic connections. Showing up completely adds value to each partnership, and prepares you for embracing love when your ultimate partner arrives.

All mixed messages have one thing in common; confusion. Whether that confusion is real or a game is the part you need to discern. This video shows you how to deconstruct an internal battle from a con to manipulate you for their control.

In new relationships, we wonder if we're texting too much or too little. What's the right amount of contact to make? Here's how to effectively use texting to increase attraction and create a deeper connection.

Breaking the news of your age-gap love can create tension and fear for both you and your mate. Here's how to present yourselves as a unified front to garner the respect and understanding you both deserve.

No matter how bad your break up, resist the urge to air your grievances on social media. Whatever you write or say will come back to haunt you.  Here's the safe (and classy) way to handle your social media PR after a breakup and retain your dignity and power.