The Patrauma Party - Heal from trauma, improve self worth, and learn to love yourself, dammit

Ughhhh. Getting honest with ourselves about our abandonment wound can give us all the ick. But did you know that your abandonment wound is actually a super intelligent response to abuse? and that it actually means your system is operating exactly as it should? In this episode, I welcome somatic practitioner Veronica Rottman to the show to talk about how the abandonment wound lives in the body and...

Look. Our culture is bonkers when it comes to body image. There is no escaping the constant pressure to check a myriad of aesthetic-related boxes (thin, tall, young, blah blah blah), and it can feel like we can't really start our lives until we've [*insert prerequisite to living life here: lost 10 lbs, gotten clear skin, had a facelift, etc. etc.*]. And (FYI) if we've experienced trauma, we're at...

Anyone else find themselves talking about men like they're a terrifying alien species? There's obviously a lot of cultural rhetoric around distrusting men ("men are dogs," "a good man is hard to find"), but even the quip is rooted in trauma. So when we're out there trying to heal from [*insert numerous possible traumas here: assault, betrayal, abuse, systemic misogyny, being over-sexualized, etc.*...

Regret can absolutely take us down. It can diminish our resilience, hope, and faith in life. BUT—cool fact—it can also be a key tool in retrieving the parts of our authentic selves that we've lost along the way. In this episode, I welcome Renee Tate back to the pod to help us understand the ways we work through the pain of regret, and the ways we tap into the power of regret. If you'd like a one-o...

Here's my stance: Sometimes we just ARE victims. There's no way around it. But sometimes we're coming from a place of "victim" or powerlessness without even knowing it—it's just a loop leftover from childhood that's still going on repeat, and it has us showing up as if we don't have choices, as if we have no agency, as if people or the world is out to get us, or as if it's all just too hard. This...

It's a big mamajama. The pain of not having a mother or caregiver who was present, tender, affectionate, wise, kind, warm—it becomes SUCH a pain source in our lives, seeping into our relationships, our ability to connect, our sense of self, our ability to open to abundance—you name it. In this episode, I welcome intuitive guide Bridget Nielsen to walk us through the impact of such a profound wound...

Ughhhhh there are so many ways we can feel stuck—stuck in jobs, stuck in relationships, stuck in a situation that won't just go TF away, or even stuck in our own compulsive behavior that we can't seem to get a grip on. Behind that is such a deep sense of powerlessness, and for those of us who experienced chronic trauma, that powerlessness is second nature. In this episode, registered clinical coun...

It's my 50th episode!!! [*Insert many emojis*] Thanks to everyone for coming along with me on this trauma ride—we out here healing! This week, I welcome clinical psychologist Dr. Lindsay O'Shea to the show to talk us through healing from trauma bonding in childhood and adult relationships—what those bonds look like, how they impact our mental health and attachment styles, and how we reclaim oursel...

Thank you for your patience! So many listeners have requested this topic. In this episode, I welcome Patruama Party listener and trauma-informed health coach Brittanie Pope to talk to us about her trauma being raised in the church—from disassociation, to shame, to losing trust. I also welcome licensed marriage and family therapist Willow Katz to the show to talk us through finding your center agai...

In this episode, I answer questions about situationships, chronic negative self-talk, and my favorite movie! If you'd like a one-on-one coaching session, birth chart reading, or tarot reading with Remy, go ⁠⁠ here. Want to connect? Find me here: ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠ Email: patraumaparty@gmail.com The contents of this podcast are provided for informational purposes only. None of the ma...

Anyone else want to crawl into a hole when this topic comes up? It is SO vulnerable and SO painful to talk about the times we've had suicidal ideation, but it's actually pretty common, and if you suffer from CPTSD, it's even more common. In this episode, I welcome my dear friend and the founder of yoga and wellness platform Coincide , Courtney Higgins, to have a real, honest conversation about wha...

Boundaries are literally THE life lesson. Like, if we learn nothing else before parting with this earth, let us learn what the hell healthy boundaries are and how tf we maintain them. In this episode, I'm joined by consciousness guide Pam Curran to talk us through her take on healthy boundaries, why "You suck" is not a boundary (womp womp), and how we maintain what she calls "soul esteem" in our q...

Turns out we all do it and turns out it's no buens. Not only does it make us feel like shit, but it also puts a huge strain on relationships. Not to mention the fact that sometimes taking something personally can lead us to deep depression and suicidal ideation. In this episode, I welcome marriage and family therapist Renee Tate back to the pod to talk about why we do it, how it impacts our lives,...

Cool fact: One time when I was like 16, I painted a girl looking terrified while someone covered her mouth with their hand so she couldn't speak. WHAT?? I'd forgotten about it completely until I was recently combing through old photos and was like: WOWWWWW this is f*cked. So many of us grew up feeling like we were invisible, powerless, and voiceless, and then we grew up and came to feel exactly th...

We're not talkin' nostalgia, baby! Emotional flashbacks happen when we experienced ongoing abuse as children, and then we get a whiff of that experience as adults, (like, maybe you hear people yelling in the apartment next door or someone takes a long time to text you back (in the case of neglect or abandonment)) and suddenly our emotional state is F*CKED. The crazy thing is how often we have thes...

Emotional neglect! Just rolls off the tongue. It's a fun form of trauma that doesn't get the fanfare it deserves (all y'all out there searching CPTSD and anxious attachment style while emotional neglect is just over here alone in the corner ). But seriously—it's a tough topic to talk about because it's the *absence* of a thing. It's what *didn't* happen. And so it often goes unnoticed and unhealed...

DEEP BREATH. Let me just start by saying, I HATE the term "daddy issues." It's SO sexist and misogynistic that men abuse their daughters, and then women become the ones who are shamed for it. So if you're feeling stigmatized for struggling emotionally because of your relationship (or lack thereof) with your dad, please know that you can let go of that shame. You aren't responsible for the abuse vi...

Sigh. We've all done it. We do it all the time. We do it in our relationships, in our search for relationships, with body image, in our careers: "If only I had this thing, I'd be happy. I'd be okay." Such a fuckin bummer. In this issue, I'm joined by somatic therapist and NLP coach Michelle Keinan to get to the root of why we do this and what it looks to heal so that we can finally feel whole with...

It already sucks to be broke, but for a lot of us, there's a lot more to money trauma than that. There's the feeling that you're not safe, the feeling that God or The Universe has abandoned you, the feeling of depression associated with money scarcity. In this episode, I welcome trauma psychologist and leadership coach Isha Vela to the show to talk about the connection between money trauma and rel...

Hold up, wait a minute! [Insert Salt 'n Pepa rap] DO YOU KNOW ABOUT INTERMITTENT REINFORCEMENT??? It basically explains why we get stuck in relationships with people who treat us like human ball sacks! You guys. It's science. It's real. Lab rats were involved. And we HAVE to address it if we want to find relationships (romantic, platonic, professional—you name it) that actually meet our needs and...

Turns out there's healthy guilt (like when you realize you need to apologize for something) and unhealthy guilt (like when your parents make you feel like shit for holding them accountable). When guilt is weaponized against us, especially as children, it can turn into shame, and shame can—and WILL—turn into a whole clusterfuck of mental health bummers. In this episode, I welcome psychotherapist Al...

Literally how does anyone survive dating—it's truly the worst. And if you're insecurely attached, it's straight up a minefield of triggers waiting to take you down. Then there's the alternative: never dating anyone—also terrible!! In this episode, I welcome somatic psychotherapist and coach Felicia Keller Boyle (@the_bad_therapist) to get into peak dating nightmare: BEING GHOSTED! (dun Dun DUN!) a...

Mmmmm... that cool feeling that you're gonna claw someone's eyes out and smile while doing it. Jealousy sucks. It makes us feel powerless, and insecure, and it brings up all our shit. In this episode, I welcome licensed clinician Andrea Brognano to talk about why jealousy feels so shameful, what lies underneath it, and how we heal. If you'd like a one-on-one coaching session, birth chart reading,...

We're mixing things up! This week, I welcome the creator and host of the Other Men Need Help podcast, Mark Pagán , onto the show to join me in a conversation about the deep and enduring bummer that is toxic masculinity. We talk about objectification, shame, hyper-independence, the male ego—and get into what's helped us work through the pain points so we're not sitting around traumatized af (and tr...

Truly, shocks should be illegal unless they involve large sums of money mysteriously appearing—NO FUCKING THANK YOU to shocking violence, betrayal, death, life transitions—the list goes on. In this episode, I welcome therapist, artist, and soft boi amateur poet Solasta McIntyre to the show to get into how shocks impact our mental health, the way shock and grief work together, and how we move throu...