The Morning After’s Audio Dump Podcast

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, a man dumped the contents of a feces-filled backpack on his ex, there’s controversy following the Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog eating contest, we’re searching for a man with a man-bun on Missed Connections, someone mailed to a squirrel to a META office, our MVP fought cops when they tried to pull him out of alligator-infested water...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, a woman attacked a man on the way to the dispensary on ‘Why you mad, bro?,’ Taylor Swift fans are buying trash from outside Madison Square Garden, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, the peanut butter floor has been reinstalled at a Dutch museum, our MVP used a stolen debit card to buy hinges and Axe body spray, porta pott...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, a man in Indiana cut off his genitals and set them on fire, another woman had her driveway ‘stolen’ in Florida, a man wore his bail bonds t-shirt in his new mugshot on Florida/Not Florida, the same elephant has killed four family members in Nepal, our MVP stole money from a Little League and spent it on strip club visits and boner p...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, a man used as a seagull as a weapon in Scotland, people in Russia are buying horses to combat high gas prices, a man dressed as a woman in hopes of avoiding arrest on Florida/Not Florida, a man experiencing a constant eye twitch kept slapping himself in the face for days, our MVP had himself a (pantsless) 4th of July weekend, mystery apples hav...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, someone is spray painting ‘I Fart3d in Yoga’ all over London, Video Jimmy from the Great Lakes Loons joined us to play Florida/Not Florida, women in Russia are selling their used breast implants, our MVP had his car stolen while burglarizing a cell phone store, Pickles the rooster is missing, and you can now bet on wildfires in Cali...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, smelly players have led a card shop in Oregon to pause their Yu-Gi-Oh tournaments, there’s a dog rental app available now in China, a woman had a bulge in her pants that wasn’t ‘anatomically correct’ on Florida/Not Florida, a lost dog was found after it was seen partying with fans after one of Mexico’s big soccer w...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, men in the UK are getting ‘vampire penis facials,’ someone forgot the L in ‘Public’ on signs in Ottawa, a woman claims someone must have put that cocaine in her butt on Florida/Not Florida, we had another update on Alaska’s Dan Sullivan(s), our MVP was upset that her roommate didn’t abide by her ‘one fa...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, an escaped giraffe in Texas was finally captured after four days, a man stole cigarettes and Twisted Teas from an apartment on Florida/Not Florida, three men attempted to break into a prison, our shirtless MVP walked into a recently sold home and said he was interested in buying it, a vigilante ‘Batman’ is taping thieves to lamp pos...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, a teenager is accused of pooping in a public pool 18 different times, ‘summer balls’ are a real thing, a woman wanted to take on a whole landscaping crew on Missed Connections, the naked woman statue in San Francisco is up for sale, our MVP invited Taco Bell employees to meet her outside to fight, the man with the smallest penis in...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, England wants to bring an end to ‘dry stroking,’ a poker player tried to use a butt plug as a card protector, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, less car break-ins in Oakland means less work for glass repair businesses, our MVP lost her job after stealing a New York Knicks trash can, a delivery robot invaded a SWAT stando...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, a Lincoln Park man mooned his neighbor’s doorbell camera, a conference on extreme heat has been canceled by extreme heat, a man destroyed a driver’s test computer with a landline phone on Florida/Not Florida, a man was arrested for masturbating on his front porch, our MVP was recently sentenced (in 2026) for burning CDs, a woman say...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Adam, a California man got stuck in a campground toilet after trying to retrieve his sunglasses, massage guns aren’t supposed to be used on your eyes, a firefighter pooped in a box on Florida/Not Florida, another couple had a bag filled with drugs labeled ‘Not a Bag Full of Drugs,’ our MVP got a ticket, called 911 to argue a ticket,...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Chad, there’s a ‘cartel’ in Japan jacking up the price of ice cream, ‘goblintimacy’ is a new dating term, a woman claimed the pants she was wearing weren’t hers on Florida/Not Florida, a bag made of ’T-Rex skin’ is going up for auction, our MVPs shot at a police drone, and we wrapped up the week with a...

This morning on The Morning After with Matt and Richard Eats, a pair of sisters stabbed a restaurant employee on ‘Why you mad, bro?,’ pickle is the spice of the summer, a man threatened people with a stick on Florida/Not Florida, we had an update on the Dan Sullivan controversy, our MVP got a ride in a stole truck to an appointment with his probation officer, a woman cooked her 8-year...

This morning on The Morning After, a blogger was arrested for sending a naked picture of Shrek pleasuring himself to a politician, a sex cruise just set sail from England, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, a man hit a bear while riding his bicycle, our MVP is known as the Banana Chip Bandit, police are looking for a man that set bras on fire at Walmart, and Lucha Libro is coming to lib...

This morning on The Morning After, a man stole a car and then stole French fries from a kid, people keep pooping in one of New Zealand’s ferneries, a man with a small penis was caught peeing in the Walmart parking lot on Florida/Not Florida, there’s a beaver hunt underway in Canada, our MVP tried to steal clothes en route to a court appearance for burglary, a pilot flew for nearly twen...

This morning on The Morning After, a man tried to run from police was attacked by an alligator, someone keeps stealing the MILF magnet at the Vagina Museum, someone was hit with an ukulele on Florida/Not Florida, we now know how many farts we should have on average, our MVP threatened to cut off his roommates genitals before taking off all his clothes and sitting at a bus stop, Dan Sullivan is run...

This morning on The Morning After, Grady Judd gave us another classic soundbite, Video Jimmy from the Great Lakes Loons joined us to play Florida/Not Florida, we told you about a new TikTok Trend that has people putting pickles in white wine, our MVP stole lawn gnomes while riding a tricycle, a woman’s home is losing value quickly after her new neighbors built a 10-foot tall poop wall on the...

This morning on The Morning After, a woman assaulted a family member after being confronted about sending all of her money to a fake Liam Neeson, a woman put her dogs ashes in her eyeliner tattoos, we played cribbage on Missed Connections, a man used a Waymo as a getaway car in California, our MVP pretended to be a 12-year old girl, a camper dumped his RV’s tank into a gas station’s di...

This morning on The Morning After, we introduced you to spermmaxxing, a woman is suing Outback Steakhouse after slipping on mashed potatoes, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, a fight broke out at a kindergarten graduation, our MVP told police she didn’t even remember having kids, and a volunteer firefighter started setting fires to fight. 00:13 - Spermmaxxing 07:55 - Woman suing...

This morning on The Morning After, a police officer pulled his gun on a colleague on ‘Why you mad, bro?,’ scientists created bread made from yeast found inside the stomach of Oetzi the Iceman, someone thought a leaf blower was a bazooka on Florida/Not Florida, we had an update on the woman that stole a Stanley for her breast milk, our MVP named his bluetooth speaker BOMB and took it on...

This morning on The Morning After, a man took his girlfriend’s daughter with him to steal copper wire, a Texas softball player has a superstition that involves eating ladybugs, there was a fight at a Pokemon vending machine on Florida/Not Florida, over 3,000 classic cars helped set a world record, our MVP curb stomped an employee that gave away his girlfriend’s order, a family found a...

This morning on The Morning After, an influencer has been banned from all Six Flags parks after eating chicken nuggets on Millennium Force, Video Jimmy from the Great Lakes Loons joined us to play Florida/Not Florida, the word ‘school’ was misspelled on one school’s yearbooks, our MVP called 911 after the bar wouldn’t sell her Jello shots, a woman took her drugs to the poli...

This morning on The Morning After, a man got punched in the park on ‘Why You Mad, Bro?,’ the bull balls on a mosaic had to be refurbished, we had a softball crush on Missed Connections, a corpse fell out of the bottom of a casket, our MVP destroyed his house after his wife told him their marriage was over, Brad Pitt is in a fight with a high-end penis cream, and we wrapped up the week...

This morning on The Morning After, we talked about ‘Emotional Boners,’ cosplayers were selling ‘feet juice’ outside of a convention in California, Makenzie Rose Boyd joined us for Totally Qualified Tattoo Advice, a man broke into a home and smeared his feces all over the floor and walls, attorney Jason Gower joined us to answer your legal questions, and a man has set a Guin...