The Missing Peace Presents : The Thought Trap

I recently came across a poem I'd written years ago, and it reminded me of the quiet agreement I used to have with life: I'll be okay when... In this episode, I explore why so many of us live that way and the freedom I've found in seeing it differently. 👉Ask me a Question becca@beccagardner.com 👉Mailing List https://www.beccagardner.com/ 👉 Find out about HOME, my 1:1 supported space https://www...

Have you ever noticed that whatever you're feeling, your mind immediately points towards the opposite? When we're lonely, it promises connection. When we're uncertain, it longs for certainty. When we're overwhelmed, it paints a picture of an easier life. What if this isn't a problem to fix, but simply the way a survival mind works? In this episode, I shares a personal story from her experience wit...

This week's Trap Talk question comes from a mum of three who says: "Parenting mainly falls on my shoulders because my husband works a lot, and we've kind of agreed that what I say goes. But honestly, that feels like a huge responsibility. I constantly feel like I need to say the right thing and do the right thing, and with my older two children I feel like we're forever coming to blows. I spend so...

We all have ideas about who we are. "I'm just the way I am." "I've always been like this." "It's in my makeup." But where did those ideas come from in the first place? In this episode of The Thought Trap, I explore how the stories we hold about ourselves are often built from experiences, comments, interpretations and repeated thoughts that, over time, begin to feel like facts. 👉Join my mailing li...

In today episode, I want to talk about what was probably my biggest coping mechanism for many years: reassurance. But while reassurance happened to be mine, this episode isn't really about reassurance. It's about coping mechanisms in general. The things we reach for when we don't feel okay. The things that seem to help, at least for a while. The things that promise relief, comfort, certainty, or d...

What if the thing we're searching for isn't more structure, but something we've known all along? In this solo episode, I explore the difference between routine and rhythm, and what happens when we start paying attention to own rhythms :) 👉Book A Conversation becca@beccagardner.com 👉Mailing List https://www.beccagardner.com/ 👉 Find out about HOME, my 1:1 supported space https://www.beccagardner....

It's the monthly segment "Trap Talk".......where I get to speak to your questions. "I’ve realised I spend so much of my life worrying about what other people think of me. I replay conversations, second guess myself afterwards, and sometimes stop myself doing things because I’m so caught up in how I might come across. I honestly think it’s holding me back". In this episode, we explore the stories t...

As a society we are always on, always available. Phones pinging. Messages arriving. Attention constantly being pulled somewhere else. In this episode of The Thought Trap , I explore the exhaustion that can come from never really switching off and the pace so many of us have quietly become used to living at. A conversation about busyness, constant availability, comparison, running on fumes, and wha...

This week on The Thought Trap , we explore how quickly the mind makes life personal. Why can two people experience the exact same moment so differently? Why do neutral situations suddenly feel loaded? And what happens when we begin to notice the stories the mind automatically creates about “me”? A warm, funny, reflective episode about the personalising mind, survival wiring, and seeing life with a...

This week on The Thought Trap , I’m joined by a special guest, Vicki Montague, a wellbeing and possibility coach. We explore parenting, societal pressures, and all the ways we can get pulled into thinking we need to figure everything out… or get it right. But underneath all of that, there’s something much simpler. A quiet knowing that’s always there, even when the mind gets loud. This conversation...

This months trap talk speaks to a very relatable question Becca, I will often feel really clear about doing something… like it’s a yes… and then I end up talking myself out of it. I usually take that as a sign that I shouldn’t do it, but then I just feel stuck. How do I know what to listen to? 👉Join my mailing list 👉 https://www.beccagardner.com/free-audio 👉 Find out about HOME, my 1:1 space ht...

What if the feeling that something is missing… is just something we’ve learned? In this episode, I share a moment from my own journey of trying to fix myself, and how that led me to see something very different. Through children, emotions, and the way we’re conditioned to relate to our experience, we explore what happens when we stop trying to fix… and start to see 👉Join my mailing list 👉 https:...

Do you remember when sleep was just… sleep? I do. And then somewhere along the way it became something to be tracking, analysed and talked about. In this episode I get honest about my own experience of the sleep spiral and what I started to notice on the other side of it. What I share isn't a sleep hack or a bedtime routine. It's something quieter — and when you see it, it changes far more than ju...

One year into the podcast, and I’ve been reflecting on consistency…and the idea that we should always finish what we start. For a long time, I believed I wasn’t a finisher — and that meant something about me. But what I see now is something much simpler… and much more freeing. This episode is an invitation to look at what’s really going on when we start, stop, change direction… and what we make th...

This episode is going live on April Fools’ Day…which felt like the perfect timing. In this episode, I explore something we don’t often notice…the quiet trickery of the mind…and how easily something can look and feel real even when it’s being created in the moment. And it’s not random. There’s a reason the mind does this. A really understandable one. But what’s even more interesting…is what’s avail...

Why do I make such a big deal out of things that aren’t that important? This week’s Trap Talk question felt perfectly timed, landing right in the middle of my own recent Thought Trap . This episode is sparked by a slightly chaotic couple of days involving a very weird cold, a podcast recording, and a missing phone. A simple situation quickly started to feel urgent, personal, and overwhelming… espe...

A family gathering, a questionable tiramisu, and a fresh look at perfection. In this episode, I explore how perfectionism can keep us stuck in our heads, chasing a moving target, and what opens up when we let things be a little more real. 👉Join my mailing list 👉 https://www.beccagardner.com/free-audio 👉 Find out about HOME, my 1:1 space https://www.beccagardner.com/new-page-2 👉Follow me on ins...

You've heard me talk about PEEP. Now let's do it, together. This week on The Thought Trap I'm guiding you through a live PEEP — Play, Explore, Experiment, Play — an invitation to turn toward your own experience with curiosity and simply look. 👉Join my mailing list 👉 https://www.beccagardner.com/free-audio 👉 Find out about HOME, my 1:1 space https://www.beccagardner.com/new-page-2 👉Follow me on...

You felt something. Your mind grabbed it. And before the feeling had even passed, it had already become evidence — evidence about who you are. That's the trap. Identity isn't built from who we are. It's built from what the mind concludes about how we feel. In this episode we're getting under the surface of emotion — what it actually is, why it's impersonal, and why nothing you've ever felt has mea...

Trap Talk is the monthly segment where I get to speak to YOUR questions. This months question............. “Hi Becca, I’m really disciplined with food and exercise. I follow plans, I stay consistent, but it feels like I’m constantly managing myself. It’s exhausting, and I still don’t feel settled in my body. I thought doing all the right things would make this easier. What would you say about this...

In this episode, I’m joined by Lindsey Elliott, a Certified Change Coach, to explore the self-esteem and insecurity trap. That quiet sense of not being quite enough. The comparing. The measuring. The pressure to improve the image of who we are. We commonly question the whole idea of self-esteem. What if “enough” isn’t something to earn? A simple, honest conversation about the freedom that can come...

“How are you?” is a question we ask all the time and one that often gets answered automatically. In this episode, I explore where our answers really come from and how easily they are shaped by thought, memory, or imagined futures rather than what is actually happening now. This is not about answering differently, just a gentle inquiry into where we put our attention and what we might notice when w...

I’ve been reflecting on the incredible guests I've had here on The Thought Trap — and honestly, every single one of them is a "Changemaker". Not because of titles or roles, but because of how they show up in the world and make a difference to others. I’ve known todays guest for a good chunk of my adult life, he’s built a business that quietly brings people together and, unexpectedly, into presence...

“I’m trying to stop smoking, or at least I’m playing with not doing it, and I’m noticing a really strong physical pull in my body. Sometimes it feels uncomfortable, sometimes intense, almost like withdrawal. How do I get through that? Surely that the physical pull is different?” I take a Gentle Approach to change. This episode takes a gentle, zoomed-out look at or experience — what’s showing up in...

In this episode, I speak about being in the thick of a habit — when there’s no room to peep or be curious. Peeping usually becomes more available when there’s a bit of distance from the habit. 👉 The Gentle Shift Habits Course https://www.themissingpeacecotswolds.com/want-to-shift-a-habit 👉Join my mailing list 👉 https://www.beccagardner.com/free-audio 👉 Find out about HOME, my 1:1 space https:/...