The Empowered Divorce Podcast; Navigating Divorce After Betrayal Trauma and Abuse

In this episode, I tackle one of the most painful and confusing questions that often follows a life-saving divorce: Was any of it real? Was there any good? Was it all bad? I dive into the cognitive dissonance that makes it hard to reconcile the good moments with the harmful ones, why your brain held on to the good, and how trauma clarity can bring painful but necessary revelations. What You’ll Lea...

Becoming Securely Attached is a practice that we all can do no matter where we are at in our healing from betrayal, abuse and divorce. Secure attachment isn’t about never feeling anxious or hurt—it’s about knowing you can handle those feelings and still trust yourself. When betrayal, abuse, or divorce shatters that sense of security, it’s easy to feel like you’ll never trust again. But attachment...

In this episode, I dive deep into attachment styles—what they are, how they influence your relationships, and why understanding them is crucial for your healing journey. Whether you’re navigating life after betrayal, considering dating again, or simply wanting a healthier relationship with yourself, this conversation will give you powerful insights. But here’s the deal: attachment styles are not l...

This episode is all about love—the love you thought hurt you, the love that felt like it betrayed you, and the love that is still very much yours to reclaim. February can be an ambush for those healing from betrayal, making love feel like a battlefield instead of something safe and beautiful. But love itself didn’t hurt you—betrayal, deception, and broken trust did. Love was never the weapon. In f...

This episode would be helpful for anyone who is navigating high conflict divorce, especially if you are preparing for court or in the middle of court. High conflict means high emotions so this episode may very well bring up some of those emotions for you. My invitation to you with that is to look curiously at whats coming up and work with a professional around how to process through these ver real...

In this episode, I delves into the therapeutic modality of brainspotting, discussing its effectiveness in treating betrqyal trauma. Do you find yourself thinking you've healed a trigger and then BAM it feels as if it just happened all over again?! The episode explains the brainspotting process, how it accesses deep parts of the brain to release stored trauma, and its differences from tradition...

In today's episode, I will be answering a listeners heartfelt question about how to answer your kids when they ask if you are ok, and you are NOT OK! But you don't want to tell them all the things, or should you? What about the questions they may have about the other parent, how do you answer those? Let's talk about how to navigate difficult conversations with your children during a divorce. I'll...

In this follow up episode, I delve into the psychological and emotional dimensions of three financial principles discussed with Jenny in a previous episode: the 'more is better' rule, the 'now is better than later' rule, and the concept that resources are limited, thus requiring trade-offs. I will explain how these principles can be applied to understanding trauma, abuse, and divorce, and how they...

AHHHH! Dating after a life saving divorce is scary right?! All the worries and fears are so valid- AND- I believe that you can prepare for healthy dating experience where you are taking a healthy risk. My Dating From Within Workshop will help give you hope and ease the fears that may bee keeping you in unhealthy relationship patterns or keeping you from relationship all together! Today I share a f...

In this episode, I have an insightful conversation with Jenie Conners, a certified financial planner and partner wealth advisor at Diversify Wealth Management. Jenie discusses her personal journey into the financial planning field, catalyzed by a family tragedy and financial setbacks. She highlights the importance of financial planning for women, especially those undergoing significant life change...

In this episode, I welcome you into 2025 with a heartfelt discussion on the importance of healing and setting goals for the new year. While reflecting on the holiday season with family and the challenge of re-adjusting post-festivities, I emphasize the significance of addressing trauma through brain spotting, a therapeutic somatic healing modality. I also highlight the upcoming Brain Spotting Inte...

Re-airing of 2023 Christmas Episode. Hello, my amazing and beautiful listeners, Merry Christmas! In today's brief but meaningful episode, I invite you to join me in exploring a powerful perspective shift. Inspired by the classic film 'It's A Wonderful Life,' we'll delve into how lost dreams can transform into newfound opportunities. This episode is for anyone who's felt their dreams slip away amid...

Merry Christmas! In this heartfelt episode, I dive into the lessons from one of my favorite holiday movies, 'It's a Wonderful Life,' and how they can help you navigate the holiday season, especially if you're dealing with the aftermath of a divorce. We'll reflect on the importance of hope, shifting perspectives, and realizing your impact on others. I'll share personal insights and encourage you to...

Why do you believe the things you do about yourself? Is it because you've been told, you're too much or not enough, of something for so long that your brain just thinks it's true? Learning to question what we believe is true about ourselves is an important part of creating new beliefs. Beliefs that will actually serve you. But, when you have been in an abusive relationship for so long these belief...

"What happened? I thought we were a happy family, I know we struggled but this? Living a double life? Cheating? Sex addiction? How did I miss this? What did I do wrong?" Your reality of the life and marriage you thought you had was shattered with the discovery or partial disclosure of the actual reality of your life, your partner and even your body. When divorce is the result of betrayal trauma an...

In this episode, I explore the complex journey of healing from sexual infidelity, abuse, and betrayal with Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife, a renowned relationship and sexuality coach. We delve into what healthy sexuality looks like, the challenges of rediscovering sexual intimacy post-trauma, and the importance of self-compassion and self-awareness. Dr. Finlayson-Fife shares invaluable insights from...

In this heartfelt episode, I dive into the concept of 'graceful acknowledgement' during a month where gratitude is emphasized. I understand that many of you may feel pressured to express gratitude, especially during a tough year filled with conflict, grief, and high conflict divorces. I introduce you to the idea of 'graceful acknowledgement,' a gentler practice than radical acceptance. This concep...

In today's episode, we're diving deep into the world of people pleasing—what it is, why we do it, and how it affects our relationships and well-being. I'll unravel the differences between genuine kindness and people pleasing, especially after challenging relationships or divorces. We'll explore the fears driving these behaviors and how people pleasing strips away our authenticity. I'll also share...

I'm diving deep into the transformative concept of radical acceptance. We'll explore how fully accepting situations and people as they are, without trying to change or approve of them, can liberate you from unnecessary suffering and emotional turmoil. We'll discuss how resisting reality creates internal strife, clouds judgment, and drains mental resources, and how detaching yourself from the need...

Today I'm diving deep into the often misunderstood emotion of jealousy and how to process it, especially in the aftermath of betrayal trauma and divorce. I'll explain jealousy in the context of internal family systems, seeing it as a protective 'manager' that signals vulnerabilities and unmet needs. Radical acceptance and healthy anger release are key strategies we'll discuss, alongside the healin...

In this insightful and empowering episode, I welcome Darcy Haas, a functional nutritionist and former nurse, to talk with me about the intricate connections between emotional trauma, chronic stress, and physical health in women. 02:39 Darcy's Journey and Transformation 04:28 Understanding Functional Medicine 06:56 Stress and Hormonal Health 11:41 Impact of Trauma on Health 22:04 Connecting Symptom...

What do you do when your kids hear a different story from the other parent? n this episode, I discusses the complexities of navigating high-conflict divorces and the critical importance of protecting children's emotional wellbeing. I talk about the challenges of managing conflicting narratives from ex-partners, how leaning into radical acceptance, emotional stability, and living with integrity can...

Today I validate the emotional turmoil following divorce and betrayal, focusing on the pervasive tendency to self-blame and shame our past self for "Not knowing what we should have known". By exploring the cognitive and psychological reasons behind such reactions, including the brain's mechanisms for dealing with trauma, I share a compassionate perspective. The episode offers practical steps for h...

Join me for a deep dive into the journey of redefining 'normal' after experiencing trauma, particularly in relationships. This episode explores the struggle of overcoming the past's chaos and creating a healthier, peaceful life. Learn about the significance of self-compassion, trusting your body and intuition, and setting new personal boundaries. Discover practical steps to break old patterns, reb...

I sit down with Kimberly Day, LMFT, to delve into the complexities of navigating second divorces—a topic many of you have expressed interest in, especially as you confront the stigmas and shame often associated with multiple marital endings. Kimberly brings a refreshingly empowered perspective to the discussion, challenging the societal narratives that frame second divorces as failures. Her insigh...