Tom Drake

The Daily Cruise and Travel News ”Podcast” with Tom Drake

Leisure EN ↓ 100 episodes

After almost 30 years of performing stand-up comedy on cruise ships worldwide, Tom Drake has seen everything, done everything, and so now he knows everything! That is why he is called the "Guru of the Seas." His podcast, which delivers all of the day's cruise and travel news, can be heard every Monday through Friday, as Tom says, wherever people "pod their cast." Offering an "unfiltered view" of the cruise and travel industry, Tom delivers the news and then gives his opinion on what it all means. As Tom says, "It's the day's news with a bit of commentary." If you are a fan of cruising, or mayb...

Author

Tom Drake

Category

Leisure

Podcast website

funnypaysoffj.podbean.com

Latest episode

Jul 11, 2026

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Episodes

May 1, 2026 Holland America is smart to focus on their small ships! 01.05.2026

Entertainers are all scrambling to get booked as performers on cruise ships.  Congress finally agrees to fund DHS and pay the TSA employees! Two amazing paramedics help deliver a brand new baby as the plane circles the airport! The Guru will be live on Facebook and YouTube beginning Monday at 10 AM!    

April 30, 2026 Europe is buying jet fuel from the U.S.? Why are our airline prices going up? 30.04.2026

Europe refuses to protect the Strait of Hormuz, even if it means planes are parked.  Royal Caribbean is now charging $30 more to find out early how bad the location of your Guarantee room will be. Is Crystal Grace, debuting in 2028,  already sold out for its first season? The majority of initial visitors travel to just five destinations!

April 29, 2026. Why do travelers continue to go to unsafe cities? 29.04.2026

 Royal Caribbean signs the paperwork for two more big ass ships! 22 Monks get arrested for carrying 224 pounds of cannabis. Now we know how they get them to shave their heads! Is the boss at JetBlue secretly lighting candles, praying that Spirit goes under? The Guru will be back live on all social media starting Monday at 10 AM!

April 28, 2026 Should the US government give the low budget airlines 2.5 billion to stay afloat? 28.04.2026

 The PGA Tour bails out of Hawaii because it can't play on brown grass. The Suez Canal remains closed, so the Oceania Vista will visit Africa! Did NCL do the right thing by turning their beautiful private island into Six Flags over the Bahamas? If the US government gives money to the budget airlines with Scott Kirby demand some money for his airline?  

April 27, 2026 The new Mixican cruise line gets some of it right! 27.04.2026

The White House correspondents' dinner shooter wasn't a rocket scientist, but he could've been. Regent Seven Seas cares about what the travel advisors think. How about the guests? The Guru is now on Facebook and YouTube every day at 10 AM starting tomorrow. Lots of pictures! Some companies are paying at $1 million fee to get through the Panama quicker. Guess who's paying for that?  

April 24, 2026 The Guru is going live on Monday! Don't miss it! 24.04.2026

 NCL's terminal in Philadelphia will not win any architectural awards! Liberal bonehead groups are warning travelers about coming to America for FIFA! Did the Iranians really seize an MSC ship because a rich son is hanging out with the Trumps? The Guru is not a fan of any cruise line's air package!

April 23, 2026 The Guru has questions about the new Oceania build? 23.04.2026

 Why didn't Oceania use professionals to deliver the message about Aurelia? Air transportation in Europe right now is pretty shaky, thanks to fuel costs and lousy Management! Did Oceana finally admit they could never sell out a 180-day World Cruise on an "O" ship? Will the US government eventually buy Spirit Airlines?

April 22, 2026 Oceania announces their next great idea! 22.04.2026

 Princess and Holland America are doing a good thing in Ketchikan! Port Canaveral CEO John Murray puts the cruise lines on notice! Spirit might get the help they need from the federal government, according to the President. European leaders still do not have any military assets protecting their ships in the Strait of Hormuz.

April 21, 2026 Air Canada cutting flights to the U.S. Will anyone notice? 21.04.2026

 The clueless president of Mexico calls the victims of the pyramid shootings "affected individuals"? Sorry, when you're shot and killed. You are a victim. Minnesota tourism officials tell people to visit while the governor of Minnesota is in Spain bashing his country. Clueless Tuesday. The CDC still doesn't know if the small outbreak on Insignia was actually norovirus. 

April 20, 2026 No terminal in Philly is a better deal for the guests! 20.04.2026

 Norway continues to lead the world in saving the planet by Tuesday! Norovirus shows up on Oceania Insignia, but almost all with the guests because the crew washes their hands. Minnesota launches an Explore Minnesota campaign to encourage people to visit. Waste of money? The USS Navy blows a hole in an Iranian box ship. Nice shot, people!

April 19, 2026 Jason Libery earned 24 million last year. Slightly more than the Guru! 19.04.2026

 MSC is raising gratuities for all guests who already get their own coffee! A federal jury awards $300,000 to a nurse who got drunk and fell down the stairs, but lived to sue Carnival. The FAA has stepped in and reduced the number of takeoffs and arrivals at a Chicago airport because the airlines are too greedy to do it themselves. There is more Norovirus on land in the US than you will ever see o...

April 18, 2026 Spirit should sue CNBC if their reporting is false! 18.04.2026

The Guru does not feel sorry for any cruise line whose ships were stuck in the UAE! The new Atlas Ocean Voyages sailing yacht sounds amazing to the Guru! An elderly man went overboard on a carnival ship in Australia. Sad news. CNBC and Bloomberg reported that Spirit Airlines will cease operations this week. They better be right.

April16, 2026 Relax! NCL Dawn failing CDC inspection is that big of a deal! 16.04.2026

The guru wonders whether sponsoring a sailing team will sell one suite on Explorer journeys, and whether they even care! Does anybody really think that the United American Airlines merger would ever be approved? Get real people! Explora Jouneys Big Boss made some good points at Seatrade! HAL is spending 500 million on refurbs! Great move!

Apil 15, 2026 The Guru is back from Seatrade and full of stories! 15.04.2026

Today's podcast features the Guru talking all about his time at Sea Cruise Global. It includes his report on the State of the Union address by Dud Barr and the Q&A session with four of the cruise industry's big bosses. This podcast is a must-listen to for anybody in the business, wondering what it's like to hobnob with the goober smoochers!

April 14, 2024 The Guru at Seatrade Cruise Global. Worth it? Find out here. 14.04.2026

The Schmilton Cabana Miami continues to disappoint! At Seatrade, Immerse and Elevate are the words of the day! Why aren't they talking about the Value of cruising at Seatrade? Canceling a presentation without notice at Seatrade is what the cruise business is all about!

April 13, 2026 The Guru is in Miami for Seatrade Cruise Global. Why? Find out today! 13.04.2026

Cruise lines are bailing on Tracy Arm in Alaska due to unsafe landslide conditions. Relax, there are plenty of other arms. Hotels have stopped whining about international visitors not coming! Now they are excited that Americans are trying out their poorly run properties! Red Bull and Twinkies as a signing bonus? The FAA is now recruiting gamers to be Air Traffic controllers. Listen to hear about j...

April 12, 2026 Carnival bans fishing from your balcony! Hang your hook somewhere else! 12.04.2026

 One patriot group wants to ban the sinking of the USS United States. A little late to the sinking! MSC signs an agreement to build another revenue-producing destination in the Bahamas! The Guru disagrees with the AI chatbot Claude about Crystal! Will Seatrade Cruise Global be ready for the GuRu tomorrow?

April 11, 2026 Does anyine care about electric cruise ships? 11.04.2026

 Global Port Holdings grabs another destination to rebuild. Acapulco.? Good luck. Meyer Werft is pimping and all electric cruise ship. But it depends on European destinations installing shore power. Good luck. The Guru wonders whether the old Seabourn Ocean ships can actually sail up a river in Europe.  

April 10, 2026 Back home and Brightline did not dissappoint! Explora II also passed the test! 10.04.2026

 The former number two guy at Oceania is now the number one guy at the Apollo Group Maritime. MSC will build a private destination in the Bahamas, seeking out the guests' money on and off the ship! No surprise here. Amtrak is Tommy's doghouse for being a lousy railroad with dishonest people. Global ports holding is not looking to rule the world. Just every cruise port in the world

April 8, 2026 Outta Here-Last day for the Guru on the floating hotel! 08.04.2026

 Oceania announced it will refurbish the 15-year-old Marina. Huna Corporation received approval to ensure Juneau is even more crowded in the summer. Crazy Corsica fishermen keep the Sun Princess from docking because the fuel costs too much. Why not? Delta joins JetBlue and United, jacking up their checked bag prices. Money. Money. Money.

April 7, 2026 Day 6 of the Guru's floating hotel extravaganza on Explora II 07.04.2026

 The port of St. John is opening two months early to welcome a couple of thousand disgruntled Viking voyages cruisers! Expedition cruising might be trending, but 12 people for Como resorts does not. Norwegian Cruise Line will use a hotel for check-in rather than a tent in Philly. The cast shows here on Explora II are really good and really live. A nice surprise.

April 6, 2026. Day 5 on Explora II. The frustration level is increasing! 06.04.2026

Virgin Voyages has to cancel the five-day trip to Bermuda because the Harbor pilots are slightly timid. The Explorer II is an excellent floating hotel. But it's not very entertaining, and I'm not sure they care! The Guru loves the idea of another terminal in the Port of Tampa. Easter brunch in the buffet restaurant is not the same as in the Main Dining Room.

APRIL 4, 2026 Better late than never! Maybe! 04.04.2026

 Are pink slips flying at Norwegian Cruise Line Holdings? United raises checked bag fees and adds confusing price options! Calling all bird watchers! Has the Guru got a trip for you? Day three onboard Explorer II. Happy Easter!! 

April 3, 2026 The Guru is sailing on Explora II. Hear all about it! 03.04.2026

 The Guru applauds Carnival's dedication to special needs cruisers. Well done. NCL rolls out prepaid parking in Miami.  The Guru does not agree with some travel aid agents who say their clients are afraid to travel. Explora II checks off most of the boxes. A desk chair in the suite would help!  

APRIL 2, 2026 The Guru is on the road in San Juan. Hear all about it!! 02.04.2026

Oceania is opening a bakery Academy for its bakers. Shouldn't they already know how to bake? Did you know that Tokyo Disneyland is a franchise? The Guru did not know. The FAA told San Francisco airport officials to reduce the amount of arrivals. Unsafe to use side-by-side runways.. Many people think the historical hotels are wonderful. He's not one of those people.  

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