The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle

Trauma during childhood can teach you to "give away your power" through self-destructive tendencies, people pleasing, and an urge to flee conflict, responsibility, and intimacy. To heal trauma, you need your POWER. Here, I share a hugely popular video from my archives on the steps to take to build the stamina, resilience and insight needed to sustain the work of healing Childhood PTSD. Try the FRE...

When we're talking about trauma, a "trigger" is a stimulus that sets off Childhood PTSD symptoms -- in particular, dysregulation. In this 4-video compilation I share four of my most popular videos about common - but often overlooked -- triggers that YOU may be experiencing now. When you learn to calm your triggers, your life gets freer and more choices are open to you. Do you have CPTSD? Take the...

If your heart's desire is to marry a man and have children but you keep dating men who don't want quite the same thing, it helps to get VERY clear about what you want and to change the way you date. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who has been sabotaging what she really wants in long-term relationships that can't bring her the future she seeks. Hear my clear advice for how to cha...

We’re surrounded by the noise of IDEAS about how to live life – “it’s all about self-discipline,” “just let go,” – “Do senseless acts of kindness” – “learn the joy of saying no.” All these ideas are in conflict with each other, so if you don’t have a burning light inside of who you are, they all just lead to confusion and emptiness. And this is especially true for people who were punished or ostra...

So many people are walking through their lives with a crushed spirit. All their hope confidence, or the inner power to do anything more than to just survive has been taken from them. They’ve forgotten who they really are, they avoid connection, and they now struggle to detect the difference between right and wrong. When your spirit is intact – you don’t put up with mistreatment. And you don’t give...

When we talk about the wounds of childhood trauma, many people focus on the pain, the tragedy, the long-term limitation some of us have struggled with. But the good news is, healing is possible. In this 4-video compilation I share some of my most popular videos that list tips and strategies to overcome the wounds of the past and to quickly progress toward a happier, more connected life. Ten Signs...

People who are ashamed or unhappy with their relationships often come up with creative ways to justify the fact that not only do they stay, but they pour out massive amounts of love, time and money that will likely never be reciprocated. The story they tell themselves is often described as “spiritual bypassing.” It’s a way to dress up big mistakes as meaningful accomplishments. In this video, I re...

It’s normal for people who were abused or neglected in childhood to create quasi-relationships where they’re somewhat loved, but also harmed. When you stay for a long time in a situation you can't emotionally bear, healing yourself means uprooting everything you know (and with kids) that's especially hard. In this video, I respond to a letter from a mother who has raised her child with a man who s...

So many people struggle to find and keep and deepen good friendships with good people. Yet research shows that the people you hang out with have a bigger effect on how your life goes than just about anything else. They influence the choices you make. They influence the standards you set for yourself. They influence the other people you're going to meet, yet who teaches you how to make and keep goo...

How can you get ahead when trauma from your past inhibits your ability to work? Trauma symptoms can limit your productivity, damage your work relationships, and prevent you from taking necessary actions to advance and enjoy your career. In this 4-video compilation, I share four of my most popular videos about CPTSD at work and teach the top symptoms that need healing so your career can rocket forw...

Entanglement happens in relationships where there is a) emotional messiness, b) fear of leaving the relationship even when that's what you want, and c) one or both people are trying to justify things behaviors that harmed the relationship in the first place. Entanglement tends to go in circles -- an attachment that’s more driven by desperation than commitment, so it tends to make both people feel...

Sometimes our childhood experiences make us WAY too good at overlooking our own needs, prompting us to "donate" all our time and effort to the life of someone else, who can’t or won’t return the favor. One kind of emotional unavailability, defined in the book “No More Mr. Nice Guy" by Robert Glover, is a man who is what he calls “monogamous with his mother.” This is a deep kind of dysfunction that...

Every video I make is based on an idea I’ve got floating around in my mind, connected with healing from childhood PTSD. And I literally never know in advance if my viewers are going to resonate – sometimes they don’t. But there's something about this video that made it go viral FAST. And I’m sharing it here in hopes you can give feedback: What is it about this video that made it SO POPULAR? Here i...

One of the really hard things about narcissistic abuse is that a parent may have randomly punished and neglected you, and left you confused about what anything means. People with CPTSD often have a hard time seeing that their parents' behaviors were not their fault -- that as children, they didn't do anything wrong and nothing could have made their parents love them properly. This blind spot can u...

Some of the best friendships in your life will be with people where there's a risk that ONE of you will be attracted to the other. When there’s no attraction, there’s no problem. But because many of us are not always honest about our true feelings, we can go a LONG time pretending to be a friend when what we’re really doing, is feeding our need for romantic excitement through an emotional affair....

When you grow up emotionally neglected, it’s not uncommon that you’ll be drawn to people who neglect you and dismiss your feelings just like your parents did. Getting small and silent around this kind of thing is a trauma symptom, and you don’t have to go along with it. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who is dating a man whose parents make her feel uncomfortable with their loud a...

If you've sought help for trauma-related symptoms you were probably told you needed to TALK about it. But a growing body of research shows that one of the most effective therapies for healing depression, anxiety and trauma is WRITING. In this video, I interview James Pennebaker, PhD, professor emeritus of psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. My work has been informed by his work since...

People with Childhood PTSD often struggle to speak up for themselves, or face conflicts where others aren't treating you well. This may have injured your ability to see things as they are. To read the room. To understand where people are coming from when they say one thing, but do another. This denial may have trained you to express your wishes, and then to become surprised and angry and CONFUSED...

I get hundreds of letters from viewers on this channel every month – way more than I can answer, and when I’m choosing which letters I’ll answer here on YouTube, sometimes I decide NOT to answer a letter, but THEN IT STARTS TO HAUNT ME. I keep thinking about the person, and thinking about their story – and the mystery of their struggles, but also the preciousness of their future. And you know what...

Obsessive love tends to kick up when your life is bleak, and you have frail connections with people and activities you love. Limerence is when that feeling becomes like an addiction, but sometimes, the obsession can drag you into a deeper mental health crisis. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who finally caught feelings for someone, but now her life is falling apart. The Signs of...

Everyone procrastinates sometimes. But for people who were abused or neglected as kids, there are extra factors that can make procrastination much, much worse. The things you’re not dealing with can take over your life, hold you back, make you depressed that you’re stuck, day after day, in the same old rut - like paralysis. In this video, I'll explain why this happens, and show. you how to gently...

More people than ever are isolated and lonely People who have lived through trauma, especially in childhood, may have suffered neurological changes that make connecting even harder. And once you are in a relationship, it can cause you to fall into trauma-driven patterns that ruin closeness. In this 4-video compilation, I share some of my most popular videos about loneliness-- what causes it, how t...

Early trauma can do tremendous damage to your ability to think, learn and remember, and one reason is the neurological dysregulation that often results from abuse and neglect in childhood. There is an injury – a developmental delay in the ability to listen and form ideas, and process them, and it often seems to get worse when we’re under stress. Trauma isn’t the cause of ALL cognitive impairment,...

One way that childhood trauma hurts your ability to have a healthy relationship is by halting your emotional development. When your parents threaten and ignore you, you have only your child’s mind to interpret why they are doing this, and how to cope with it. Some people shut down emotionally, which obviously isn’t good for adult relationships later. And some people fixate on GETTING the love they...

Opinion bullies have been running around, enjoying a new sense of unlimited power for several years now, trashing good and decent people, shunning things like discussion, inquiry and debate. It’s shocking how many people are willing to sacrifice basic respect and good will in order to demand they get their way -- and that everyone agrees with them. This is both a symptom of trauma, and a cause of...