The Burt Selleck Podcast

This week gets weird fast. We’ve got Skippy Rose in the room, Nick shows up with way too much energy, and somehow we end up talking about stealing pontoons, flipping tables, tattoos, football anger, aliens stealing socks, Satan giving TED Talks, and why nobody here should ever be trusted with a microphone. Conscious Pilot keeps coming up whether it makes sense or not, and the episode never really...

This one-hour episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is a grimy, funny, totally undisciplined mess—in other words, exactly what fans expect. It opens mid-conversation and dives headfirst into a heady mix of lemonhead consumption strategies, hyper-specific butt talk, bizarre sports science, and group therapy for Detroit Lions fans. The episode’s standout moment? The invention of the Bustometer —a ghos...

This episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is a meandering, unfiltered group therapy session masquerading as a football postmortem. The guys open with an absurd riff on abandoning sports for surrealist art, then pivot to a wildly unstructured but emotionally sincere autopsy of the Detroit Lions' season. It’s part football barroom brawl, part late-night existential crisis, peppered with jokes about s...

The latest episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is, in a word, an unhinged rollercoaster. Clocking in at an absurd sprawl of bodily-function banter, Detroit pizza discourse, digressions about gloryhole etiquette, and a surprise (and actually impressive) original theme song, this episode throws structure to the wind and leans fully into the show's guiding principle: “if it breaks, we lean in.” Ian’s...

This episode is The Burt Selleck Podcast at its most unhinged and, frankly, its most itself. It opens with the gang arguing about whether Alex “nudged” or “kicked” his dog — a debate that somehow spirals into childhood animal cruelty confessions, the Bikini Bottom Holocaust, and an unexpectedly thorough lecture on perch sizes. The tonal whiplash is almost impressive. Mid-show, the guys pitch a Civ...

This episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is a sprawling exercise in absurdity, contradiction, and relentless riffing—a 90-minute meander through toilet-brain sports talk, dodgeball-based geopolitical allegories, and that old chestnut: Hitler’s micro penis. The boys, as ever, swerve between high-concept satire and middle-school locker room banter, stopping just long enough to half-sincerely debate...

There’s a moment about 45 minutes into this episode where a casual discussion about gay NFL positions—yes, really—suddenly blossoms into an earnest, semi-informed argument about the taxonomies of monkeys, followed by a detour into Native American tribal politics, and eventually lands on whether cougars should be stabbed on sight. That’s the kind of ride you’re on with this one: no seatbelt, no map...

This one’s pure, unfiltered Burt Selleck chaos: two guys rambling through politics, bodily decay, conspiracy theories, Alien lore, college nostalgia, and whatever stray thought wandered into the room. It’s a hangout episode in the truest sense, which is both its charm and its biggest flaw. The standout thread is Nick’s mysterious detainment, which they treat with the emotional gravity of someone m...

This episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is a sprawling, chaotic rollercoaster through injured necks, steroid shots, Detroit Lions heartbreak, improvised bank robberies, Red Dead Redemption ambitions, and passionate arguments about alien linguistics and NFL salary caps. It's absurd in all the right ways, even when it’s wildly incoherent. The real charm lies in the chemistry among the hosts. Their...

This episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is a sprawling, often absurd fever dream that somehow still manages to be coherent—if you're willing to redefine coherence entirely. It opens with an extended, uncomfortable riff on Native American stereotypes, movie accents, and pseudo-anthropological nonsense, followed quickly by a surprisingly sincere (if clumsily expressed) discussion of panic attacks a...

This episode is a sprawling, nearly two-hour ramble that manages to cover everything and nothing all at once. It opens with a loose thread about The Conjuring 4 and ends somewhere between Simon Cowell’s plastic surgery and DJ Screw-coded Texan soap operas. The connective tissue is, as always, the quartet’s chemistry and their unrelenting ability to riff on any tangent—be it diabetic piss preferenc...

If this episode had a title, it might be “Gone, Daddy John, and Other Disasters.” The Burt Selleck boys return after a brief hiatus, and what follows is a sprawling, loosely hinged mix of Tigers baseball talk, fat jokes, Trump-bashing, military coup hypotheticals, historical fur trappers, gum jobs, and Halloween candy ethics. In other words, business as usual. This episode is quintessential Sellec...

This episode is an accidental triumph of chaos, built on derailed intentions and the unintentional arrival of a co-host who was allegedly not supposed to be there. The cast tries to re-create a lost episode, but what they actually produce is something arguably better: a meandering, overstuffed, strangely compelling hour that veers from Container Store conspiracies to spider whispering, to debating...

This episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is an exhausting exercise in chaos, confrontation, and cum metaphysics, clocking in as one of the more unhinged entries in the show’s already lawless archive. There’s a football postmortem up top—half-hearted analysis sandwiched between dick jokes and mutual invalidation—before the show veers completely off-road. What follows is 90 minutes of libertarian-ba...

“HVAC Mercenaries” is the kind of episode that starts with a middle finger to structure and then spends two full hours proving why structure might actually be a good idea. Nick opens with the dramatic claim that he won’t speak unless the others mention something he cares about—then proceeds to talk almost non-stop, which is as close as this podcast gets to narrative irony. What follows is a relent...

This episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is a chaotic, rambling triumph of nonsense that somehow becomes weirdly endearing the longer you stay with it. From the opening argument about music intros and podcast rankings to the absurd speculation about podcast playoff structures, the show luxuriates in its own lack of direction. It’s like being trapped in a dorm room with three comedians who drank to...

This episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast might be the most unhinged, hilariously self-indulgent display of chaotic male friendship since the invention of microphones. Clocking in at over an hour, “Armpit Thunder” is a genre-defying whirlwind of petty grievances, diss tracks, AI music production, and philosophical debates about Komodo dragons and superhero lore—all filtered through the lens of four...

This episode is the Burt Selleck crew at their most sprawling and chaotic — a two-hour conversational drunken walk that somehow stumbles from mocking Ian’s absence to a half-serious geopolitical “analysis” of Gaza, to the agricultural needs of famine-stricken Ethiopia, to belly-slapping leagues, clairvoyance-for-hire schemes, NFL player sexuality conspiracies, lesbian pitbull ownership statistics,...

This episode is what happens when you leave four unmedicated men with microphones and no agenda. The conversation, if you can call it that, veers from Alex’s famously thick liver to speculative skunk anatomy, TikTok’s “white shampoo” trend (spoiler: it’s not about hygiene), and a disturbingly vivid reenactment of a skunk attack. There’s a decent 20-minute stretch in the middle where the group fixa...

If you think structure matters, keep scrolling. This installment is a 95-minute free-association rocket that launches with Michigan’s oppressive heat and crash-lands on cryogenically-preserved genitals. The hosts — Alex, John, Nick, plus a drive-by from Ian — pinball between bodily ailments (an infected salivary gland becomes surprisingly fertile comedy), elaborate golden-shower hypotheticals, and...

This episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is a long, winding descent into absurdity, bodily functions, semi-coherent sexual philosophy, and barely tethered banter that somehow manages to be both repellent and engaging. It opens with lamentations about Ian's absence and devolves almost immediately into discussions of raw oatmeal diarrhea science, “gay ninjas,” and the gay Kinsey scale like it's all...

This episode unfolds as a chaotic, meandering, deeply personal sendoff for Ian, a longtime fixture of the show, and perhaps the most emotionally resonant installment to date—at least by Burt Selleck standards. From the moment it opens mid-bicker about lighting and podcast “purity,” you know you're in for an unedited mess. But underneath the mess, there’s real sentiment: the hosts love Ian, even as...

This episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is essentially a 2-hour unfiltered brain dump from four dudes, one of whom just returned from a European trip and has a haircut to prove it. Ian’s whirlwind recap of Amsterdam, Hamburg, Berlin, and Warsaw is the closest thing to structure, but it’s continuously derailed by the others with riffs, grotesque hypotheticals, and some truly questionable history t...

This episode is a full-blown character spiral wrapped in layers of absurdity, veiled sincerity, and comedic endurance. “Talent Brando,” presumably a riffing improv persona conjured by one of the hosts or a guest, dominates the mic for the first quarter of the episode in a fever dream of wannabe-rapper bravado, circular pseudo-wisdom, and overcooked industry paranoia. The performance leans heavily...

This episode opens with a gold trophy sitting in for the absent Ian, and somehow that sets the perfect tone. What follows is a deeply unserious, often morbidly hilarious conversation between the core group of Alex, John, Nick, and the spectral presence of Ian. Their stream-of-consciousness banter drifts through topics like grave aesthetics, cremation preferences, echolocation envy, and the mechani...