The Billie Cedillos Podcast

Looking back over the last decade and especially this past year I share some highlights of my healing journey in the hopes it will help those of you who are either contemplating a healing journey or are perhaps at the beginning or middle of your healing journey.

Understanding as a mother the grief not talked about that we go through as our children transition into independence and adulthood.

Confusion is often the fruit of manipulation. It shows up when someone is saying one thing… and doing another. When their words don’t match their actions. When you’re being told you’re the problem… while you’re the one trying to make sense of everything. This is what gaslighting does. It slowly disconnects you from your reality. You start second-guessing yourself. You start over-explaining yoursel...

Love bombing feels AMAZING at first. That's the trap. Your brain gets flooded with dopamine and you think you've found 'the one.' But it's calculated manipulation designed to bypass your logical thinking. Here are the 8 red flags I wish I'd known. A Breakdown of 9 Red Flags to watch for when getting to know someone. The Connection to our childhood trauma and the importance to slow down when gettin...

Part of a series of- A Holy Truth Holy Truth #1 — God Is Not the Author of Confusion Script “Here is today’s Holy Truth. If someone’s presence constantly leaves you confused, anxious, doubting yourself, and questioning reality… that is not the Spirit of God operating in that relationship. God does not manipulate. God does not gaslight. God does not twist truth to control people. The Holy Spirit br...

“Complex PTSD happens when someone has experienced repeated emotional or psychological trauma over a long period of time. This can come from childhood abuse, narcissistic relationships, chronic gaslighting, or environments where you constantly felt unsafe. What many people don’t realize is that trauma changes the nervous system. Your brain becomes wired to scan for danger. So when something feels...

Today I want to talk to the woman who feels shattered. The one who feels like something inside her broke and hasn’t fully come back together yet. Psalm 34:18 says: “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” I need you to notice something. It doesn’t say: God tolerates the brokenhearted. It doesn’t say: God waits until you’re healed. It says He is close. And...

Victim Blaming: How Can we better assist Survivors of Abuse. On Episode 5 on my podcast I share some insightful tips how to help survivors of abuse and some of the costs of victim blaming. What victim blaming creates: ~False guilt ~Toxic shame ~Self-doubt ~Delayed healing ~Nervous system dysregulation Beloved, You did NOT choose the abuse. You chose a person who did not reveal their true nature. N...

Today we’re talking about something many survivors feel, but don’t have language for enmeshment. Enmeshment is not love. It feels like love at first… but it slowly erases you. If you’ve ever felt like someone’s mood controlled your peace, If you’ve lost clarity, boundaries, or your sense of self in a connection, If walking away felt like losing oxygen This episode is for you. We’re going to talk a...

Holy Truth Collection -Podcast Holy Truth Here’s the holy truth abused women need to hear: God is not neutral about what was done to you. He saw the manipulation. He heard the lies spoken behind closed doors. He counted every tear you cried in silence. And the same God who is gentle with the wounded is fearsome toward the one who caused the harm . Scripture says the Lord is close to the brokenhear...

I want to talk about something that changed the way I understand love. Because for a long time, I thought I just had a bad picker. I thought I kept choosing the wrong people. But the truth is, it wasn’t my mind choosing my partners. It was my nervous system. Your nervous system is shaped in childhood. Before you have language. Before you have logic. It learns what feels safe, what feels familiar,...

Chaos felt familiar because it mirrored your childhood emotional environments. Criticism, neglect, mocking etc. We talk about how familiarity is not compatibility although it may feel like it. The cost of not stopping the cycle and choosing toxic/abusive partners. How we choose chaos because it’s all we knew growing up. It is not about intelligence or ignorance, it’s about poor programming as a ch...

There’s always a seed where chaos and confusion start. For me it started in childhood with codependency with my caregivers. That later carried on into my romantic relationships. Today I share a brief part of my life as a teenager where the seed began in choosing abusive unhealed men in my life. If this resonates with you I encourage you to subscribe and to share with with someone else who might re...

Hi, and welcome to the Billie Cedillos podcast. I want to thank you for joining me today, and I have a special word for the woman who feels unseen. Let me remind you, dear soul, that you are not invisible, even when your prayers feel like they echo back in silence, even when you pour yourself out, and no one notices, God does. 
God sees you, beloved. And the Bible says in Genesis 1613, you are the...

"I grew up in a home where love came with strings, where boundaries were blurred, and where chaos was... familiar. It shaped how I saw relationships, how I responded to conflict, and how I measured my worth. Ilearned early that keeping the peace sometimes meant ignoring my own truth. "it meant serving others and meeting their needs and abandoning myself. Codependency is not a badge to wear though,...

And this podcast is about the moment clarity replaces confusion. Here, we talk about trauma, healing, relationships, and faith — without minimizing the hard parts or spiritualizing pain. This space is for women who loved deeply, ignored their instincts, and are learning to trust themselves again. Because when you know… you don’t go back. Welcome.”

Hi and welcome! I’m Billie Cedillos. This podcast is about the moment clarity replaces confusion. Here, we talk about trauma, healing, relationships, and faith — without minimizing the hard parts or spiritualizing pain. This space is for women who loved deeply, ignored their instincts, and are learning to trust themselves again. Because when you know… you don’t go back. Welcome.”