The Ax Files UNLOCKED

We're back for Marco's second bite of the apple, and it gets weird right away. First we're going to a concert, and then we'll learn a little about how the physics of morphing works! Join Kate, Patch, and Vivian to talk about Understanding Offspring, Doing a Wizard Voice, and Minding Your Wads! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/usweirdoscast, where you can get the advance feed of this very show-...

Things are getting a little over the top as the yeerk exploration of illegal logging practices revs up to full speed. It's just...it seems a little looney tunes though? Join Kate, Vivian, and Nobody to talk about Cassie's Guilt Meter, That's Not How Skunks Work, and An Extremely Brief Discussion of an Extremely Small Part of Buddhist Philosophy With Regard to Nature! Check out our patreon at patre...

It's time for Cassie's second turn at the wheel as we dive into the strangeness that is The Secret! the Yeerks are getting into logging, and worse...they're doing it *legally*. Time for the kids to mess up a perfectly legit business operation! Join Kate, Vivian, and Nobody to talk about Zoro Onepiece, Termite Grammar, and Definitely Not Morphing for Personal Reasons! Check out our patreon at patre...

We're back, and we're here to finish off our latest book! This was a weird one, only two episodes. The chapter numbers really messed us up here. Join Nobody, Kate, and Vivian to talk about How Would Andalites Wear Sunglasses, Yelling at the Space President, and Lighting up a Forest with Napalm! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/usweirdoscast, where you can get the advance feed of this very show...

Ax finally gets a chance to tell us what he's all about in his very first book! Finally, it's time to learn whether Seerow did anything wrong! Join Kate, Vivian, and Nobody to talk about Separating the Saucer Section, the End of the Butt-Eating Era, and whether bringing your "cousin" to school with you was a real thing in the nineties! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/usweirdoscast, where...

It's time for the grand finale as the animorphs race to the end of their first megamorphing adventure! Join Vivian, Kate, and Nobody to talk about the Temporal Prime Directive, How Many Wizards Are There, and Gorillas on airplanes! Plus, the animorphs square off against their deadliest foe yet: miniscule insects! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/usweirdoscast, where you can get the advance fee...

Howdy folks, and many apologies for the delay! Since we had to re-record this, this one is hot off the presses through the magic of TIME TRAVEL. Join Kate, Vivian, and Patch to talk about creating a sustainable local ecosystem instead of a lawn, the one dream no human has ever had, and casting the dracon beam spell! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/usweirdoscast, where you can get the advance...

Megamorphin' Time continues as we begin our first (and hopefully only) obligatory amnesia plot! Join Kate, Vivian and Patch to talk about Marco going to a party (yes, STILL), how much fun it is to be a bug, and the possibility of the return of a character we haven't seen since book one! And maybe still haven't, she doesn't get named! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/usweirdoscast, where you ca...

It's not morphin' time- it's time to MEGAmorph! Join Kate, Vivian, and Nobody for the first episode of the first Megamorphs book, and find out why Tobias hates crows! On top of that, it's time for Cartoon Amnesia Plot! AND a giant monster from outer space that eats houses like candy! Also, we argue about the numbering system of the books, we argue about whether a specific joke is a Caddyshack refe...

As Rachel dives deeper into her newfound strategy of losing herself in a bit of the old ultraviolence, the Animorphs discover the horrors of the grimdark future...the distant year 2005! Join Kate, Vivian, and Nobody to talk about andalite stand-up comedy, early 2000s webcomics, and pilot the Frenchman Esplin, or Temrash will have to do it again Check out our patreon at patreon.com/usweirdoscast, w...

Not that we haven't always been reading a wild scifi book series? But we're moving into a much wilder place here. By which I mean Space Gandalf is here! Plus, Rachel's indecisiveness only gets worse as the pressure her family is putting on her increases! Join Kate, Vivian, and Nobody to talk about the animorphs getting vored, what is this Ellimist guy's deal anyway, and Nobody STILL refuses to shu...

In this week's episode, Rachel is feeling a lot of pressure in her home life, which drives her to act out...by assaulting a circus performer? Join Vivian, Kate, and Nobody to talk about the Bear Necessities, who's the Snoopy, and more! Plus, we argue about where the books take place for a while, but we all forget that it's in Pasadena! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/usweirdoscast, where you...

In the final chapters of The Capture, we finally reach the meat of the story, Jake, taken captive by Temrash waits helplessly, hoping his friends can keep him captive long enough to starve out the yeerk in his brain. Also, Sauron is there for some reason! Join Kate, Vivian and Patch to talk about carrying on the memory of the people you outlive, finding pity for even the most wicked of creatures,...

It's time to start getting into the meat of what The Capture is about! We're gonna infiltrate a hospital to stop some slugs, and nothing at all will go wrong! Join Kate, Vivian, and Nobody to talk about retconning how yeerks work, saying slurs at your space friends, and weirdly wealthy teenagers! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/usweirdoscast, where you can get the advance feed of this very sh...

It's a little bit of a weird and grim one this week as we dive into book six! The first segment of the book basically doesn't have anything to do with the rest of it, but at least there's some morphing shenanigans! Join Kate, Vivian, and Patch to talk about weird bugs, finding an office for your fake boy scout troop, and whether a yeerk would take your hrt! CONTENT WARNING  Starting at about...

n the final episode covering book five, we're in for some horrible revelations as the Animorphs are taken aboard the Pool Ship and presented to Visser One! Join Kate, Vivian, and Nobody to talk about how Visser Three is canonically Bad At This, Animorphs board game night, and finding your reasons to fight (again)! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/usweirdoscast, where you can get the advance fe...

It's time to spring into action as the Animorphs begin their plan to build a distress beacon so they can steal a spaceship. What could go wrong? Certainly not unanticipated ego-death as they become animals who have no individuality! Probably things will be just fine! Also, Nobody and Kate have a long conversation about That One Time They Slept On An Aircraft Carrier! Check out our patreon at patre...

Howdy! Sorry for the delay there. We're jumping into Marco's first book to discover that he's perfectly willing to do the same crazy stuff Rachel does...as long as he gets praised for it afterwards. Join Kate, Vivian, and Nobody to talk about the crushing despair of realizing your parents can't take care of you, the horror of being boiled alive, and Skittles! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/u...

It's time for the closing of book four, a book that Applegate called her favorite in an interview once. The animorphs have now safely reached the bottom of the ocean, but what mysteries lie below? How will they escape with their newfound treasure? If andalites don't have mouths, do they eat with their butts? Join Kate, Vivian, and Patch for all this and more! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/u...

It's time to dive in for another entry in the dolphin story! Join Kate, Vivian, and Nobody to talk about the fascinating ways K.A. Applegate portrays marine life, and the semi-mystical reverence she seems to have for whales. Marco is grievously wounded! The Animorphs get high (on life)! Our show's namesake finally shows up! It's Animorphing Time! Check out our patreon at patreon.com/usweirdos...

Howdy! So a weird thing happened with my audio for this episode-it's full of clicking and banging noises that I can't seem to get rid of: if I remove them, my voice goes too. I apologize for the inconvenience, and and working to figure out what caused this so I can make sure it doesn't happen again. Join Vivian, Kate, and Patch to talk about Cassie's star turn! We'll talk about becoming prey to tr...

Tobias still has a long road to walk (fly?) but in the finale of the third Animorphs book, we get the clearest picture of him possible, as he begins to come to terms with how he fits into the world now: not boy, not hawk, but both. Also, Visser Three got a see 'n say! Join Kate, Vivian and Nobody to discuss Transparent Aluminum, FINALLY doing your invasion homework, and Tobias just seriously screw...

The Animorphs are in for a rude awakening, but mostly because they make some WILDLY unfounded assumptions about how intergalactic conquest works. Listener, I promise you this: the alien conquerors will not give up and go home if you blow up ONE spaceship. Join Kate, Vivian, and Patch to talk about the airspeed velocity of a laden hawk, the SKUNK ZONE, and Tobias finally beginning to get the insigh...

It's time to start the first Tobias book, and the thermal count is Off The Charts. This kid loves ascending columns of air that occur when the sun heats hard Earth and the intervening air! He's also very sad, which we'll discuss in DETAIL. Join Kate, Nobody, and Vivian to talk about WOLVES DO NOT WORK THAT WAY, elephants where you least expect them, and actually how do taxxons work, anyway? Check...

Howdy folks! Apologies for the delay, but we're back for the climactic finale of Rachel's first book! A finale that mostly comprises of her being locked in a box while everyone else does the fighting for her! Join Kate, Vivian, and Nobody to talk about The Inherent Angst In The Hearts of Teens, Visser Three's favorite movie, and kind of a lot about Lord of the Rings. Turns out Rachel's a fan! Chec...