The Attachment Confessions

Y'all – "communication issues" might be the most common complaint in relationships. But here's what most people don't realize: you can't fix your communication until you fix your emotional safety💜 This week I'm joined by Kameran Al-Areqi — Gottman Certified Marriage Coach, straight-shooter, and one of the most practically brilliant guests we've had on TAC. Kam is breaking down exactly why so many...

Here's something nobody in the modern dating conversation wants to say out loud: Hookup culture isn't freedom. It's a trap. Especially for those of us with insecure attachments. This week I'm joined by Bev Mitelman – Certified Relationship & Attachment Trauma Practitioner and founder of Securely Loved – for one of the most important conversations we've had on The Attachment Confessions. Bev br...

Let me ask you something — how many times have you said yes when you meant no? Stayed silent when you should have spoken up? Set a boundary and caved on it within five minutes?🙋 Same, y'all. Same. And as a healing fearful avoidant, I am so done letting that be my story. This episode is a wake-up call — for my anxious preoccupieds, my fellow fearful avoidants, and honestly anyone who's ever abando...

What happens when two avoidants fall in love? In this raw, eye-opening episode, we go inside the trenches of the most painful relationship dynamic — the Fearful Avoidant and the Dismissive Avoidant — with real-life couple Tesha & Taylor. This is not a highlight reel. This is the unfiltered truth about what it actually looks like to love someone when each of your biggest needs are your partner'...

Y'all – this one is personal. The fearful avoidant / dismissive avoidant relationship dynamic is, without question, the most painful attachment combination out there. And as a healing FA who's been on both sides of it? I know this one all too well.  In this episode, we're getting into exactly why the FA/DA pairing starts off feeling like fate — and why it almost always ends in flames. What we cove...

Hello, Confessions Fam! Welcome back for episode 23! He’s baaack! Everyone’s favorite Dismissive Avoidant (actually, recently discovered Fearful Avoidant who leans avoidant) – Brent Stokes – is joining the pod again to help answer YOUR questions! You’ve inquired – and as your semi-fearless host, I’m here to give you my {not so} expert attachment advice, purely based on my past year of personal hea...

Grab a hankie for your happy tears — because episode 22 is all about the holy grail of attachment styles: the Born & Raised Secures🙌 This is the final episode of TAC's 4-part attachment style deep-dive series, and we're going out with a bang. Because honestly? After three episodes unpacking insecure attachments, nothing feels better than getting an up-close look at what secure attachment actu...

Grab your one-way ticket to cringeville, y'all — because episode 21 is a deep dive into the most complex attachment style of them all: the Fearful Avoidant. And since this one hits particularly close to home for yours truly, I am not holding back any punches💜 Sometimes called disorganized attachment, the FA is my own attachment style — and this episode is my most personal deep dive yet. Whether y...

Grab a pillow to scream into – because episode 20 is all about the Dismissive Avoidant😅 The DA tends to get the most attention of all the insecure attachment styles — and for good reason. It's the most predictable, yet often the most frustrating, confusing, and heartbreaking attachment to be on the receiving end of. Whether you're a DA yourself or you've loved one, this deep dive is going to make...

Y'all — before we get into today's topic, I have to share some news that still has my jaw on the floor. The Attachment Confessions has been named one of the Best 30 Attachment Theory Podcasts in the US by Million Podcasts, ranking alongside some of the leading experts in attachment theory. I am truly flabbergasted and so incredibly grateful. All glory to God — and to YOU, my confessions fam!🎉💜 N...

One of the most common questions I've gotten since starting this podcast is about love languages — and how they relate to attachment styles. So in the spirit of Valentine's Day, we're getting into it 💜 You've probably taken the love languages quiz. You know your results. But here's what most people don't know — your attachment style is actually what predicts your preferred love languages. They're...

Conflict. Just the word makes my body tense up. And if you're anything like me, yours probably does too. 😅 But here's the thing – it's not conflict itself that destroys relationships. It's how we handle it. And for those of us with insecure attachments? We were never really taught how to do it right. Episode 17 is all about changing that.💜 What we cover in this episode: Why conflict feels so sca...

What's up, guys! Welcome back for episode 16 of The Attachment Confessions! "I am who I am – take it or leave it!" Sound familiar?? Maybe you've had partners make similar claims? Perhaps your current partner has told you this a time or two? Or shoot, you might even be the guilty party, just like I have been in past relationships! Today's episode is all about facing the person we see in the mirror...

Happy New Year's Eve, everyone! Welcome back to The Attachment Confessions! Since we are on the cusp of a new year, there's no better time than now to set some solid dating and relationship goals. Whether you're single, dating, or already committed to someone special, this week's episode is packed full of resolutions to ensure that your love life thrives in 2026.  Cheers to the new year! xo - Chel...

Hello confessions fam!! Welcome back to The Attachment Confessions! On today's episode, we're diving into a topic that has been all the rage on social media in the dating world, especially over the last few years – love bombing. Not gonna lie you guys, just the mention of that term gives me full-on body chills. In the worst way! Love bombing is essentially bombarding a new romantic interest with o...

Y'all — I just finished Dr. Sarah Hensley's 4-week hybrid group coaching program. And I have SO much to say💜 If you've been following along, you know I've been in the thick of it — doing the actual work of earning my attachment security, not just talking about it. Episode 13 is my full, honest debrief. The highlights, the hard parts, and everything in between. What we cover in this episode: A wee...

Brent is back — and this time we're getting into the good stuff 👀 In part 1, Brent walked us through how his dismissive avoidant attachment formed in childhood. In part 2, we're picking up right where we left off — diving into how those DA tendencies actually played out in his romantic relationships, including a real behind-the-scenes look at how his attachment showed up in his marriage. And the...

Y'all have heard my fearful avoidant woes plenty by now — so it's time to hand the mic to someone else🎙️ Introducing a brand new series here on The Attachment Confessions: Guest Lived Experiences — where guests from all walks of life and across every end of the attachment spectrum give us a real, unfiltered insider look at what it's like to live with their insecure attachment style. And our very f...

What's up, everyone! Welcome to The Attachment Confessions! We've made it to episode 10 – double digits, baby! Today we are taking our previous discussion on narcissism a step further and examining the most painful duo that exists – the narcissist / codependent toxic relationship dynamic.  From an attachment lens, the codependent partner subconsciously enters relationships with their anxious attac...

Hey everybody! Welcome to episode 9 of The Attachment Confessions! On today’s episode, we're doing a deep dive into a topic that a number of you have asked me about – narcissists. Particularly, where does narcissism fall on the attachment spectrum? When it comes to how the two of these coincide, there actually is no correlation at all whatsoever. Narcissism is a highly complex psychological constr...

What’s up, everybody! Welcome to EPISODE 8 of The Attachment Confessions!! Guys – We’ve hit a milestone making it this far. Fun fact – 90% of podcasts don’t make it past episode 7, which is B-A-N-A-N-A-S. But here we are, episode 8 baby! Thank you so much for giving me space in your life and joining me on this attachment healing adventure! It seriously means the world *insert joyful teary-eyed emo...

What's up, guys! Thanks so much for stopping by for episode 7 of The Attachment Confessions! Today we're continuing our breakup series with an episode featuring some sure-fire ways to stay strong during the dreadful post-breakup season, including a spotlight on one pro tip in particular that has gained massive popularity over the last few years among attachment experts and relationship coaches ali...

What's up, everyone! Welcome back for episode 6 of The Attachment Confessions! Today's episode centers around one of the questions I get asked most about when it comes to attachment – Breakups. UGH. Breakups. The dreaded B word.  Breakups. Are. The. Worst.  But just like so many other things when it comes to how we handle the highs and lows of relationshipping, there's actually a science behind ho...

Hello everybody! Welcome to The Attachment Confessions! Thanks so much for joining me for Episode 5 – Why Fostering Secure Attachment In Our Kids Is So Crucial. In today's episode, we take a deeper dive into one of the early attachment experiments that our guest from episode 4, Brie Neil, mentioned toward the beginning of our conversation – Mary Ainsworth's 'Strange Situation' experiment. This exp...

What's up, guys! Happy Wednesday! I am SO incredibly excited to have my VERY FIRST guest on the pod with me today!!! Brie Neil joins The Attachment Confessions to nerd-out with me on all things attachment science! Brie is a Licensed Professional Counselor specializing in attachment. She is the owner of Thrive Counseling Clinic in Tulsa, Oklahoma, where she focuses on individual therapy, couples th...