The Angry Therapist Podcast

What if the thing shaping almost every decision you make is happening quietly — without you realizing it? John breaks down a powerful idea from psychologist and Nobel Prize winner Daniel Kahneman: there are two selves at play — the experiencing self (who lives life moment-to-moment) and the remembering self (who tells the story and makes most decisions). When those two don’t agree, you can end up...

In this episode, John sits down with therapist Taune for a wide-ranging, honest conversation about the love lessons that shaped them — and the patterns many of us keep repeating without realizing it. They explore how chemistry can masquerade as care, why intensity often feels familiar even when it’s unhealthy, and how relationships quietly shift when attraction turns into caretaking. Along the way...

In this episode, John answers listener questions about breakups, emotional cheating, boredom in relationships, scarcity mindset, defensiveness, and what it really means to compromise without abandoning yourself. Why is it harder to let go when things ended “well”? Is emotional cheating still cheating? When do needs become “demands”? And how much space is too much space for an avoidant partner? Thi...

Love doesn’t disappear - it changes. In this episode, John Kim explores the stages of love, from early fantasy to real connection. If you’ve ever questioned the spark, the shift, or the “middle” of a relationship, this will help you understand what’s normal, what’s real, and what’s worth building. This is a conversation about choosing depth over fantasy - and learning what real love actually asks...

John sits down in Costa Rica (yes, literally in a golf cart) with two therapists — Vanessa Bennett and Madeleine Downey — for a “therapists are humans too” episode built around questions you’d ask in therapy… that end up turning into real-time revelations about identity after 40, emotional safety, and what we stop tolerating once we’ve lived a little. This conversation lands especially hard if you...

Many people reach a confusing moment in their healing journey: they start dating healthier partners… and suddenly desire feels flat. Calm feels boring. Chemistry disappears. In this solo episode, John Kim breaks down why this happens - and why it doesn’t mean anything is “wrong” with you. If you’ve ever wondered whether you can rewire attraction without forcing yourself into a relationship that do...

What if the hardest part of healing isn’t pain — but joy? John Kim talks with Dr. MC McDonald about grief, intimacy, self-trust, and the quiet ways we hide when connection feels unsafe. MC shares why joy has been the hardest emotion to let in, and how learning to feel safe again changes everything. A grounded, human conversation about healing while still figuring it out. 🔗 Guest Links Dr. MC McDo...

Some of the hardest questions we bring into therapy aren’t about what happened — they’re about why it hit so deeply. In this episode, we explore the quiet, uncomfortable moments many people struggle to name:the anxiety between dates, the sudden loss of attraction, the grief that feels bigger than a divorce, and the confusion of wanting connection while needing boundaries. These aren’t dramatic rel...

In this episode, John Kim shares a simple moment from the ocean that became a powerful lesson about relationships and emotional repair. While learning to surf in Costa Rica, two very different encounters in the water reveal why ruptures are unavoidable—but repair is everything. One moment of anger leads to disconnection. One moment of acknowledgment leads to instant safety and ease. John also shar...

What if the problem isn’t that you haven’t found your purpose — but that you’re trying to find something that was never meant to be found? In this episode, John sits down with Bill Burnett and Dave Evans, co-creators of Designing Your Life, to explore a radically relieving idea: There is no final version of you. Instead of chasing meaning, purpose, or fulfillment as a destination, Bill and Dave in...

Do you find yourself giving more, waiting longer, explaining harder — just to keep love alive? In this episode, John Kim reflects on overgiving, emotional boundaries, and the quiet ways we abandon ourselves in relationships. Recorded in Costa Rica, he uses lessons from surfing to explore why love shouldn’t feel like anxiety, confusion, or constant effort. Inspired by the idea of “Let Them,” this e...

You didn’t marry the wrong person — you’re just in a stage of your relationship. In this episode, John Kim sits down with attachment expert Thais Gibson to break down the six stages of a relationship — and why so many couples get stuck thinking something is “wrong” when nothing is actually broken. We talk about: Why attachment styles are not labels, and how they can be rewired The difference betwe...

Some of the most important questions we carry are the ones we’re afraid to say out loud — even in therapy. In this episode, John answers real, vulnerable questions about self-worth, dating, anger, emotional safety, and long-term relationships. These are the thoughts people whisper to themselves at night, hesitate to bring into the room, or feel ashamed for having at all. This conversation isn’t ab...

A year ago, on January 7th, my house burned down. This solo episode is a reflection on what that loss revealed — not just about grief, but about meaning, identity, and the quiet permission to live differently in the second half of life. I talk about the difference between a house and a home, what it means to lose community, and why starting over isn’t always a failure — sometimes it’s prescribed....

In this reflective, unscripted conversation, John Kim speaks with therapist and yoga teacher Daniel Stewart about consciousness, ego, and authentic living. Daniel shares how a life-altering experience reshaped his relationship with presence, stillness, and inner truth. Together, they explore ego death as a doorway to growth, why slowing down matters, and how conscious awareness transforms the way...

Now that 2026 is here, John Kim shares 12 powerful questions to help you live with more honesty, alignment, and intention this year. This episode isn’t about fixing yourself — it’s about telling the truth. About what feels empty. What you’re tolerating. And what it means to build a life that actually feels honest. A grounding conversation to return to throughout the year. 🌊 Surf Camp + Wellness R...

In this episode of the video course, we explore one of the most powerful concepts in personal transformation: unlocking your inner code. You’ll learn how your false beliefs, old stories, and disconnected parts of self quietly shape your life — and how to rebuild a stronger, safer inner container that allows you to grow instead of staying stuck. Through storytelling, real-life examples, and practic...

In this lesson, we explore how to move from a life shaped by fear, dread, shame, and survival into a life built on joy, creativity, presence, gratitude, and alignment. You’ll learn how to pull yourself out of lower frequencies, design a safe life container, and step into an attracting state — where the right people, opportunities, and experiences naturally find you. This is how you stop forcing yo...

This episode is about the parts of ourselves we don’t easily name. In Part 2, we explore unspoken hurt, projection, scarcity, envy, anger, and intimacy — and how these experiences shape the way we show up in relationships and in our work. We talk honestly about using productivity and helping others as a shield, the lingering fear that success doesn’t erase, and the protective parts we built long a...

This episode is about what happens when we slow down and ask the questions that don’t come with neat answers. In an honest and reflective conversation, we explore the inner world behind the therapist’s role — the places where healing is still unfolding, emotions are still complicated, and vulnerability still matters. We talk about being seen in relationship, struggling with sadness and anger, the...

In this episode of Hard Things to Bring Up in Therapy, we sit down with the questions people are often too afraid to ask out loud — the ones about love, loss, sex, shame, attachment, boredom, longing, and the quiet fear that maybe something is wrong with us. From wondering why “healthy love” feels boring after toxicity… to grieving a breakup someone else moved on from too quickly… to asking how of...

In this module, we explore why healthy love can feel unfamiliar — even uncomfortable — when your nervous system is used to chaos or stress. You’ll learn how your brain adapts to emotional environments, why joy can feel out of reach, and how tiny moments of safety can transform your entire relational world. What you’ll learn: Why calm love can initially feel “flat” How repetition compulsion shows u...

In this module of the video course, we explore why we repeat the same relationship patterns — even when we know they’re not good for us — and how understanding your emotional wiring can shift everything. You’ll learn: Why familiar relationships feel magnetic (even when they hurt) How early belonging shapes adult attraction The difference between healthy excitement and chaos How to navigate trigger...

In Part Two of this powerful conversation, John Kim and Shaka Senghor go even deeper into healing, alignment, and the spiritual mechanics of change. Shaka opens up about: How alignment shapes everything you attract What manifestation really is — and what it’s not Moving from shame into self-respect How imagination kept him alive in solitary confinement Daily practices that cultivate grace, joy, an...

In this uplifting and deeply human conversation, John Kim sits with bestselling author and speaker Shaka Senghor to explore healing, forgiveness, purpose, and the power of rewriting your story. Shaka shares: What it meant to write a letter to his mother after decades The journey from incarceration to inner transformation How forgiveness liberated him more than anger ever could What manifestation r...