The Adult Chair Podcast with Michelle Chalfant

Fear creeps in and out of our lives all the time. It's just a human emotion, but it's a sneaky one. It starts small, then all of the sudden, we're overtaken by it until it becomes paralyzing. A little bit of fear can quickly turn into a lot of fear. A few weeks ago, I shared a story with you about some anxiety I was experiencing and a six-step process to move from panic to peace quickly (check out...

The other day I heard from someone who was having a bad day. She asked if this meant she had lost her self-love and how she could know she had enough self-love. That conversation made me realize how little we know about self-love, and it inspired me to do this show.  Like any relationship, our relationship with ourselves has its ups and downs and its good and bad days. Just because we don't "feel...

We all know the word "narcissism." We can usually spot a narcissist a mile away. They are loud, want all the attention and can be obnoxious. This is known as overt narcissism. But can you spot a covert narcissist? They can be tricky, with a more "subtle" form of narcissism. It can sting just as badly, but you have no idea it's happening (at least not initially) because it's so subtle.  A covert na...

What do you do when anxiety creeps up out of nowhere and sends you into a state of panic? Maybe it's a stressful call or email, an overflowing to-do list or all of your worries being flung in your face at once, until it feels like fear is taking over your body.  You know the feeling: irrational thoughts, a racing heart, a mind that's racing even faster and even symptoms like a headache or upset st...

There is nothing worse than when we find ourselves caught in a bad mood. Whether we wake up on the wrong side of the bed or something triggers us and sends us into a funk, we all experience moments or even days where we feel a bit "down." Often, it can be difficult to identify where our mood has come from or why we feel this way. We might just know we feel bad, sad, lonely, anxious, depressed or e...

We can never talk enough about boundaries! They are so important for loving ourselves, living empowered and creating healthy relationships, but most of us never saw healthy boundaries modeled and struggle with setting them. That's why I'm SO excited to have the amazing boundary and relationship expert, Nedra Glover Tawwab, on this week's show! In this episode, we have a great conversation about bo...

I have heard from so many of you that wanted more information on Sex Addiction so I decided to have my friend and sex addiction specialist Abbe Barclay on. Abbe is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and certified Sex Addiction Therapist. Abbe is a wealth of information and didn't hold back on today's show. We discussed how sex addiction develops, porn addiction, masturbation, if recovery is...

Happy New Year! I thought long and hard about this kick off show and know how so many of us strive for big change in the New Year but in my experience, small changes lead to big impact. In December I fell upon a book (it actually felt like it jumped off the shelf to me), :) that I have read several times. It's a classic book that you might have read as it came out in 1997. The book is: The 4 Agree...

We made it through the holidays! How are you feeling...Drained, relieved, elated? Now is the best time to "clean yourself off" and today and get yourself ready for the New Year. In today's show I explain a bit about how we can be dysfunctionally connected to others and don't even know it. I let you know how you can tell and exactly how you can "cut those cords". Even if we don't have a dysfunction...

In a word, victim energy is just plain yucky. We fall into victim when we least expect it and "think" it feels good. We feel like we deserve to feel this way, we have been wronged for goodness sake...and then we wake up. In today's show I share with you a personal experience I had, where I feel into that victim energy, not once but twice! It felt deserving and great until I woke up to truth, to wh...

Today on the show we have Patti Elledge back again to talk about how we can heal our early developmental wounds, attachment wounds, trauma, abuse and more by working with the wisdom of the body. This is not a show about "body work," but instead a show about how we learn to feel our emotions, our felt sense and use our body as a navigation system for healing old wounding.  If we don't pay attention...

Ah the holidays, what a wonderful time of year. The rushing around the shopping the preparing of food the obligations to attend all the parties. It's a codependents nightmare! By the time the first week of January hits we are wiped out and in bed with fatigue from all the caretaking and controlling we did during the holidays. It can be exhausting for us codependents! In today's show, I give you to...

Happy Thanksgiving all! Today is the day that marks the official "mad dashing" around to get to the parties on time, buying the perfect gifts, lots of rushing here and there with lots of traffic and the common denominator...stress (and of course it's not all bad...we have some fun too).    What I hear so much about from people is yes a lot about this stressful time of year but even more about how...

Childhood sexual abuse creeps into the lives of innocent children on a daily basis. As children, we are defenseless to our abusers. Dr. Gregory Williams was one of those children.  On today's show, we have Dr. Gregory Williams on sharing his story of childhood sexual abuse, how to heal from abuse, what the signs are of childhood sexual abuse and lastly forgiveness.  We also spoke about the importa...

I am so excited about this show. On today's show I interviewed a client and she was able to find her truth, step into her power and learn how to set boundaries-all in one show!  This is a client from our membership group that wes interested in learning how to be free from the stress of pleasing her parents and standing up for herself. Our monthly theme in the membership is "I'm Free" and she wante...

On today's show we have one of my favorite people and therapists, on the show-Karen Gelstein. Karen helped us to understand our defenses and how to heal them and change how we react with others.  She shares with us how humor, ruminating thoughts, missing red flags, codependency and even addictions are all ways that we defend ourselves to stay safe.  We delved into the inner child and how the inner...

Happy Halloween! After so many questions coming in about The Adult Chair, I felt like it was time to do a show on this.  In today's episode I answer where the Adult Chair is and how to get it back if you've lost access to it. How to find your Adult if you never witnessed a healthy one growing up.  Lastly, I answer what the Adult Chair even is. It's a fun episode with examples and the key to gainin...

Today on the show, relationship and attachment expert, Silvy Khoucasian and I have a conversation about attachment in relationships. We talk through all of the attachment styles and how to heal and find secure attachment regardless of your style.  We also talk about the importance of boundaries and how to set them as well as shame and trust in relationships and how to build this.  Regardless of yo...

Wow and what a show this was - Jim Fortin is a genius! On today's show, Jim Fortin, Master Hypnotist and Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) was on with me and we discussed how to reprogram the subconscious mind.  He teaches us how to break habits, addictions anxiety and depression and why having a healthy self identity and image is vital to success.  If you are ready for tra...

Relationships with narcissist are insidious. They begin one way and over time, very slowly and covertly, change and become poison.  We wake up one day and wonder what we did wrong and how we got here. We blame ourselves and can even feel embarrassed to tell others.  In today's very vulnerable show. Tracy shares her story of narcissism. She married a wonderful man and within a 2 year period, her li...

Are you ready to shift out of procrastination, perfectionism and people pleasing? (I can't imagine anyone that doesn't have their hand up).  Well today's show we are diving into The Adult Chair model and looking deeper at our "parts".  Our inner unconscious parts are running the show until we bring them into awareness to transform.  Today I am going to show you how to use this model and transform...

What a show! Today's show with special guest - Marriage and Family therapist, Meghan Crough was as empowering as it was inspirational.  Meg answered so many important questions about raising kids. We talked about so many things including temper tantrums or angry kids, how to discipline effectively, boundaries versus control, what to do if you have a spouse or co-parent with different values and id...

This show was incredible! Ramona Reid, Enneagram coach and I had a fascinating conversation about how our childhood wounding affects us later on in life and creates the masks that we wear to cover up our wounding. Ramona does a beautiful job of blending the Enneagram into The Adult Chair and teaches us how to live from our essence (otherwise known as our Adult Chair), regardless of our wounding. ...

Why do people cringe at the suggestion of setting a boundary? So many people respond with, "I don't like confrontation", when I suggest a boundary. Setting boundaries is tough to do if we were not modeled healthy boundaries growing up. Even if we came from a pretty healthy family, few people grew up with healthy boundary modeling.  In today's show I talk about what boundaries are, how to set them,...

We can never have enough self esteem! So many of us didn't have healthy self esteem role models growing up so we are embarking on this journey now. Here's the good news, it's never too late! With the help of The Adult Chair model we can live our lives to the fullest and create happiness when we thought it wasn't possible. Healthy self esteem from The Adult Chair is not only possible, it's happens...