The 12th Step Podcast

Ever feel like your life is a series of trials you didn’t sign up for? This week, we’re stepping out of the rooms and into the "Ordinary World" of Joseph Campbell’s Hero’s Journey. We break down why your struggle with addiction isn’t just a series of mistakes, it’s the "Call to Adventure" you were initially too afraid to answer. We explore how the "Abyss" of active addiction mirrors the darkest pa...

Recovery isn’t a static state, it’s a practice. In this episode of The 12th Step, we break down our current "recovery toolkit." We discuss what’s working (and what we’ve had to outgrow), the real-time challenges we’re navigating today, and the intentional steps we’re taking to level up our spiritual and emotional fitness. No fluff, just the reality of the work.

In this heartfelt episode, we respond to a listener, Scott, who bravely shares about the crushing shame, low self-worth, depression, and anxiety that often follow acting out. Even while working a solid program and taking responsibility, he finds himself stuck in emotional fallout that feels harder to escape than the behavior itself. How do we tell the difference between healthy accountability and...

In this episode, we respond to a courageous letter from Keith, a listener with several years of clean time who has recently found himself caught in a new and unexpected relapse pattern, using AI tools to create pornographic content. As technology evolves, so do the ways addiction can manifest, and many recovery resources haven’t yet caught up. What happens when the very tools you need for your car...

What happens when your "inside" doesn’t match your "outside"? This week on the 12th Step Podcast, we’re exploring congruency, the essential practice of aligning your daily actions with your recovery values. Living out of sync with yourself creates the secret stress and shame that often fuel addiction, damaging your relationships and making sobriety feel like a heavy mask. Join us as we discuss how...

The gym is packed, the "dry January" posts are peaking, and the pressure to reinvent your entire life by February 1st is at an all-time high. But for those in the rooms, we know a secret: willpower is a finite resource, and resolutions are often just premeditated resentments. In this episode, we pull the curtain back on the "New Year, New Me" industrial complex. We discuss why traditional resoluti...

In Part Two, we dig beneath the anger and reactivity that so many addicts identify as their “core issue” and uncover the deeper truth: anger is often the smoke, not the fire. We explore how rage, irritation, and a short fuse act as emotional armor, protecting us from the feelings we’re terrified to experience. This episode looks at why so many people in recovery can understand their healing intell...

In this first part of our two-episode series, we take on a topic many in recovery quietly fear: the overlap between addiction and narcissistic traits. Are they connected? Do early patterns of emotional detachment, superiority, and rule-bending feed an addiction, or does addiction reinforce those traits? And what does it really mean when a therapist says you’re showing “narcissistic qualities”? We...

In this week’s episode of The 12th Step Podcast, the hosts read a heartfelt letter from Aaron, a listener who’s been in recovery for four years and recently faced an emotional challenge, his sponsee decided to move on to another sponsor. Though Aaron knows it’s “not personal,” he admits to feeling hurt and a little betrayed after investing so much time and heart into helping someone else. The host...

In this heartfelt episode of The 12th Step Podcast, the hosts read a letter from a listener who’s grappling with confusion and fear about a possible sex addiction. Together, they dive deep into the difficult questions: How do you know when sexual behavior crosses the line into addiction? Why aren’t medications alone the solution? And what does “sobriety” really mean for someone in recovery from se...

Author and listener Tera Lynch makes a powerful return to the podcast to tackle two incredibly difficult topics she submitted herself. This week, we dive into the profound shame betrayed partners experience when they keep the secret, the painful isolation that comes from keeping quiet. We'll also examine the pervasive sexualization of everything in society and its devastating impact on a partner's...

This week, a familiar name joins us as a guest! We're honored to welcome Tera Lynch, an author, listener of the show, and Betrayed Partner who found her voice through recovery. Tera shares the incredible and difficult journey that led her to write her book, exploring the raw shame and pain she experienced, and how she moved past the victim role. She’s turned the tough questions she sent to the sho...

In one of the most heartfelt letters we’ve received, listener H writes about the crushing reality of losing nearly everything to sexual addiction—career, family, friendships, and a sense of home. The weight of shame, regret, and emptiness can make it feel impossible to even imagine recovery, let alone begin rebuilding a life. In this deeply compassionate episode, we address the raw question: Where...

In this episode, we tackle one of the most misunderstood and isolating forms of addiction, sexual addiction. Listener Richard asks a brave and important question: How do you approach recovery when the addiction itself is tied to shame, secrecy, and confusion? We dive into the unique challenges that come with this struggle, why secrecy keeps the cycle alive, how shame distorts self-worth, and what...

In this deeply personal and powerful episode, we explore one of the hardest parts of recovery, making amends after the devastation of sexual addiction. When lies, secrecy, and betrayal shatter trust, the pain ripples far beyond the person in recovery, impacting partners, families, and friends. How do you begin to rebuild after that kind of wreckage? What does a healthy amends look like when the pe...

In this powerful episode of the 12th Step Podcast, we're joined by special guest Therapist Colby to explore the transformative practice of Internal Family Systems (IFS). Learn how IFS helps us understand the different "parts" within ourselves — and how that awareness can lead to deep healing, especially in recovery. Colby even guides Gary through a brief demo to show how the process works in real...

On this episode of the 12th Step Podcast, we’re joined by therapist Colby to explore the often-overlooked experiences of betrayed partners. Together, they address listener questions such as:     •    How can you prevent a caring partner from slipping into indifference?     •    Do you realize your spouse is reliving every shared moment to question its authenticity? This candid conversation shines...

On this episode of the 12th Step Podcast, we’re joined by therapist Colby to tackle some tough but important listener questions:     1.    What happens to a spouse when they see their partner only taking half measures in recovery?     2.    Are you a tourist in recovery—just visiting but not truly living it?     3.    Are you working the 12 steps for yourself or only to save your marriage—and why...

On this episode of the 12th Step Podcast, Steven shares a heartfelt listener email about navigating the chaos of addiction, recovery, work, and family. In his message, Steven admits how often he’s tried to bargain with chaos—hoping for just a little peace or balance—only to realize that chaos doesn’t make deals. Through his journey, he’s discovering that balance isn’t found in control but in surre...

Tune in to this episode as we hear from a listener who’s one year into recovery—committed, attending meetings, and working with a sponsor—but still struggling to connect with the 12 steps. For this neurodivergent individual, the structure of the program often feels more like pressure than support. While their sponsor, therapist, and spouse all believe in the process, they’re left wondering if it t...

After the chaos subsides and the big milestones are behind us, what comes next? In this episode, we hear from Kevin, who’s seven years sober and thriving in his family life—yet feeling the quiet pull of complacency. Together, we explore what it means to keep growing when the emergencies are over, the structure softens, and the old demons aren’t banging at the door. Join us as we discuss strategies...

Recovery is anything but static—it's dynamic, personal, and constantly evolving. In this episode, we open up about where we are right now in our individual recovery journeys. From early breakthroughs to deeper emotional work, each of us brings different tools to the table depending on our current stage. Tune in as we share what’s working for us, how our needs have changed over time, and why recove...

Change isn’t easy—and recovery even less so. In this episode, we dive deep into the uncomfortable truth that sacrifice is often the price of progress. Whether you're navigating personal transformation, healing from past wounds, or breaking free from destructive cycles, giving something up is often the first step forward. Join us as we explore what it really means to let go, why it’s necessary, and...

As promised, if we ever found the recording Daniel lost, we would put them out for you to here. Well great news is Daniel found them and here is the final of three lost episodes. In this episode, we reflect on a profound quote shared by a listener: “The young man who rings the bell at the brothel is unconsciously looking for God.” What does it mean to seek wholeness in all the wrong places? How do...

As promised, if we ever found the recording Daniel lost, we would put them out for you to here. Well great news is Daniel found them and here is the second of three lost episodes. In this deeply personal episode, we explore the intersection of recovery and divorce, inspired by a listener’s powerful message and request to hear more about Daniel’s story. What does it look like to rebuild after a mar...