That's Absurd Please Elaborate

In this episode Trace takes way, way too long to explain that dreams are pretty darn short. Meanwhile, friend of the absurd, Deboki Chakravarti squeezes every last drop of information about breastfeeding. QUESTIONS Deboki Chakravarti: "Why do we only breastfeed our babies, but not other close relatives and friends to boost each other's immune systems?" from Kathy Trace: "How does time in dreams wo...

It's the most wonderful time of the year! When the fish in the water make the kids scream and holler and panic with fear! That's right, it's Shark Time. You all know what we're referring to but we think the term might be trademarked like the Tuber Bowl and Taco Thursday. Anyway, we're kicking off the celebrations and to help us do so we went out and (politely) caught the coolest shark expert we kn...

In this strange episode Trace obsesses over the wild water system stretching across North America, and Julian contemplates indoor clouds and ACTUALLY ANSWERS: Does this solve anything?!?! Thanks to Dr Brian Rahm from the New York State Water Resources Institute at Cornell University for answering my silly questions. Find out more about water: https://cals.cornell.edu/water-resources-institute QUES...

This week we try something a little different — the ⚡️THUNDER ROUND ⚡️ as Jeff Goldblum says in Jurassic Park Uno, “Your [science nerds] were so preoccupied with whether they could, they didn't stop to think if they should! ” In this special episode, Julian and Trace snagged every dinosaur related question we could fit in a shaving cream can. Then, like a couple of velociraptors in a kitchen we...

Setting: Dry, warm evening in a small pub in Los Angeles. Deputy Julian: "Whew-whee! What's that smell?!" Detective Kyle (with a light drawl): "That's ozone, Julian. Something out of this world happened in this English phone box." Dep. Julian (looking up at the sky): "By out of this world…you mean up there in the sky?" Det. Kyle: sighs heavily Dep. Julian: "I'm going to go check!" Julian unfurls h...

Trace WOOD really like you to know that Dr Sam Zelinka from the Forest Products Lab is really SWELL, and he is KNOT KIDDING (I’m out of puns). Also, Julian talks about airplanes (again). QUESTIONS Julian: "What is the fastest color?" from Rey Trace: "How much does my house shrink in the winter and expand in the summer?" from Chris Do you have an absurd question? Maybe it's a silly idea that popped...

When I was a kid, I ran around a corner and a tree branch went right into my eye. Luckily, my mom kissed it and made it all better… or… was it my brain that made it better? And can dogs do that too? Brb, gonna go kiss my dog. QUESTIONS Julian: "Do animals get the placebo effect??" from  Trevor (poll winner) Trace: "How long have people been kissing kids boo-boos, and does it work?" from ...

This is our first LIVE SHOW ever!! We were invited to perform the podcast live at Smith College in Massachusetts and people actually came! Thanks for all your support these past two years. We wouldn’t be here without you all. Thank you! QUESTIONS Julian: "Is it possible to maintain a tunnel from one side of the earth to the other? What would be the environmental effects?" from Weina Lu (she/her) T...

Bananas are positively aching to murder you. They’re radioactive, they’re clones, they’re slippery, they’re filled with potassium (which explodes when it hits water). Ignore those mosquitoes over there in the corner, pay attention to this murderous banana! NO DON’T PULL THE CURTAIN QUESTIONS Julian: "How many bananas would it take to kill a man?" from Hannah (she/her) Trace: "Could Mosquitoes go e...

Turns out plants are absolute CHATTERBOXES! They talk so much that they make Julian look like a silent partner (he’s not). Instead, he uses a silly German accent to accost our guest Maren Hunsberger all about plant communication. And, speaking of intense interrogations, Star Wars’ Tatooine gets a lot of play in the pop-science space news, but here at home having two suns is way hotter, and also (s...

Let’s just wait a minute while everyone logs on… just a miiiiinnuuuuute, OK do we? I think… Yes, we have everyone! Welcome y’all to our weekly corporate roundtable, before we get started let’s all do some SNAPS for Norm for his Thanos Post-Mortem! The deck was amazing and I think there were some incredible insights to share. But today we’re throwing it over to Trace to speak to our MISSING AMERICA...

Ever notice that our fingers seem to fit perfectly in our nostrils? Is... is that supposed to be like that? Our Patreon subscribers picked this little gem so Trace dug deep to find an answer. Then Julian tries to figure out just what it would take to make a star-encapsulating super structure, better known as a Dyson Sphere. QUESTIONS Julian: "What percentage of the earth mass it would take to make...

Hi All! Trace and Julian are taking a bit of a break this week but fear not, we still have some content for you! This is one of our favorite old episodes where Julian learns the REAL alphabet, also known as the ABG’s (not a typo); Trace discovers we are all constantly online whether we like it or not by exploring the mysteries of WiFi; and special guest Dr Virginia Schutte dives into a super-power...

This episode Julian tries to think of an even better calendar (too bad "Julian Calendar" was already taken) and Trace thinks a thought so hard his head hurts. QUESTIONS Julian: "Is there a better calendar than the Gregorian? Would it solve any obscure problems?" from Daniel Trace: "Can you think something in your head so loud that it can physically hurt you?" from Austin Do you have an absurd ques...

Let’s get ready to RUMMMMMMMBBBLLLEEE!! In this corner, we have a normal human who is definitely not a psychopath, and in the opposite corner we have… a fly. Just like, a fly. Also Julian is here and has an amazing story about melting gold with acid rain! QUESTIONS Julian: "Could we produce enough air pollution to make the sky rain aqua regia? At what point would it begin to dissolve gold?" from M...

Tonight our chefs have prepared an all-natural pasture-raised and pristine ivory-hued plutonic entree, slow-cooked under rich, Indian-spiced tectonic compression for 50 million years, adorned with a constellation of tourmaline and garnet, presented alongside gossamer-thin schist ribbons. Then, for dessert, an insulative coating of CHOOH2 which should leave your myelinated neuronal strands feeling...

In this episode, we learn Julian used to wear fedoras. He says, it’s been forever and a day, but I’m going to wait a Planck beard-second to see if that bears out. Before that, Trace combs through the hairy subject of human fur — about which he’s an experienced expert. Plus, like a hair on the tongue of your mind we just can’t seem to stop screaming about this one emo song. QUESTIONS Trace: "What i...

Ever get caught in a light drizzle and think, "Ah, this is nice"? WELL WHAT IF IT WAS ACTUALLY HORRIFYING??? Julian explores the several ways air resistance keeps rainstorms from becoming catastrophic bombardments from the sky. Then Trace tries to get inside the mind of Julian's chihuahua. Turns out most of her thoughts boil down to "shake" and "bark". QUESTIONS Julian: "What if rain drops did not...

Wheel wheel wheel … this episode definitely gave us both a headache. I swear we’re not going to conquer every silly meme from your group text (or maybe we will?). QUESTIONS Julian: “Are there more windows or doors in the world?” from Liam Trace: "Headaches… Why???!” from Anna from Athens Do you have an absurd question? Maybe it's silly idea you had, a shower thought about the nature of reality, or...

This episode Trace tears into the age-old question, “What color should your English notebook be?” Special guest MJ Wu from the podcast Everything is Public Health looks at dogs and broccoli and somehow relates them to public health, and Julian attempts to find permanent sunscreen for his pale, pale, oh-so-pale skin. Is it gross? You betcha! QUESTIONS Julian: "Permanent Sunscreen?" from MJ MJ: “Wha...

If you were shrunk REALLY ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ ᵣₑₐₗₗᵧ ₛₘₐₗₗ … would we be able to live? Did the documentary “Honey, I shrunk the kids” LIE to us?! Julian grabs his magnifying glass to learn Mor(anis). Meanwhile, Trace wants to know if … if the … uh, the … BLARG! IF SPEAKING A NONSENSE WORD can actually help! QUESTIONS Both questions this week are POLL WINNERS selected by our Patrons! Thanks for voting! Julian:...

Easter is around the corner, but where does that weird Bunny get all the eggs? And why are there eggs in the first place? Guest Yasmin Khan (The Young Turks) has an answer. Meanwhile, Julian explores the word of bat-style crime fighting on a budget and Trace explores if living on Mars would make us super aggro! QUESTIONS Julian: "How can I be Batman on a Budget?" from Wyn (featuring Jasmine from G...

Can the sun be beaten at its own game… OF BEING A SUN?! Julian shines some light on it. Meanwhile, as he spends time on the science of the extremely large, Trace gathers data concerning the massive impact of 0s and 1s. Note: they are very very very very smol.  QUESTIONS Julian: "How many lions would beat the sun?" from Daniel Trace: "How much does data weigh?" from Yael Do you have an absurd...

Happy love celebration week!! In honor of how much we LOVE our patreon subscribers, Trace and Julian answer two winners of our Patreon polls! It takes two 🎶 to make a dream come true 🎶 It just takes two — or is it three? What if it was three? Julian checks the math. Meanwhile, Trace (wait doesn’t that mean three again?) gets around in the animal kingdom, but not the waay you thiiiink! If yo...

Space, the final frontier — of cuisine. This week Trace unpacks the standard food replicator used by the United Federation of Planets. Meanwhile, in Scene 34, Julian ponders of coconuts could actually find their way to Arthurian England vis-a-vis Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy Grail. In both answers one COULD find yourself asking, “Where’d ya get the coconut?” QUESTIONS Julian: "What woul...