Temporally Scripted

Send us Fan Mail Count Binface may be Nigel Farage's ONLY opponent in the Clacton by-election. Every major UK party is boycotting the vote, and the bookies are slashing the odds on the bin. Farage resigned as MP over allegations of undeclared donations, then immediately stood for re-election in his own seat. Labour, the Conservatives, the Lib Dems and the Greens have all refused to play along...

Send us Fan Mail An Australian air con cleaner just shouted "NOW" at 122 decibels and became the loudest human alive. Two immigrants investigate the world's loudest man, and whether Jack could take the record. History was made this week: Joseph McGrail-Bateup, a part-time town crier and air conditioning cleaner from Canberra, out-shouted the entire human race at 122.4 decibels, roug...

Send us Fan Mail Why is every UK high street the same vape shop and barber? We discuss, responsibly and without accusing anyone, the £30m laundering crackdown. Debenhams couldn't survive. Woolworths couldn't survive. And yet every town in Britain now supports four barbers, a vape shop and an American sweet shop flogging £9 cans of Prime, all thriving shoulder to shoulder, completely abov...

Send us Fan Mail Keir Starmer resigned. We read the whole speech so you don't have to. Two British expats go line by line through the most baffling political goodbye in years. Starmer is gone, the sixth UK prime minister to quit in seven years, and his farewell speech was a thing of beauty.  Jack and Adam break it down claim by claim: the economy "growing faster than our peers", the...

Send us Fan Mail The US government ripped away the world's best AI model and nobody's entirely sure why. Classic. Anthropic released Claude Fable 5, let everyone play with it for three glorious days, then got a phone call from the Commerce Department at teatime on a Friday telling them to switch it off for the entire planet.  National security, apparently. The same government that blackl...

Send us Fan Mail Britain's most dangerous annual tradition got conquered by a German YouTuber. Again. Every spring, Gloucestershire rolls an eight-pound wheel of double Gloucester down a near-vertical hill and invites the public to chase it. Bones break. Grandmothers get knocked unconscious.  Chris Anderson, the 23-time champion, came out of retirement to defend national honour and lost to a...

Send us Fan Mail The UK has banned social media for under-16s, single-handedly saving childhood. The state would never lie to you. Come inside, it's fine. Two British blokes in Vietnam on the under-16 social media ban, screen addiction, and the government that loves your kids more than you do. We get into why the algorithm is a casino in your pocket, why the man whose top comment on the &quot...

Send us Fan Mail UFC Freedom 250 just put cage fighting on the White House lawn. We called it. Two British blokes react to the most absurd sporting event in political history. We recorded this before UFC Freedom 250 actually happened, and somehow reality was even wilder than we predicted. Trump's 80th birthday, America's 250th, and a cage fight on the South Lawn. Here is everything we go...

Send us Fan Mail The SpaceX IPO is the biggest in history, and the price tag makes no sense. Here is the trillionaire maths before SPCX trades. SpaceX is listing at around 1.77 trillion dollars, the largest IPO ever and seventh by market cap on day one. The problem: that is roughly 100 times its revenue, only Starlink actually turns a profit, and Elon Musk keeps about 85 percent voting control thr...

Send us Fan Mail A million young Brits aren't working or studying. We were both NEETs, so we'd know. Two expats unpack why an entire generation checked out, and where all the first jobs went. The UK just passed one million 16 to 24-year-olds not in education, employment or training, the highest since 2013. Jack and Adam (both former NEETs) get into what's actually behind it: the dea...

Send us Fan Mail Tony Blair quit politics twenty years ago. So why does it look like he's still running the country? Two Brits abroad dig into the Blair Institute, the billionaire money, and the net zero row with Starmer. Jack and Adam break down Tony Blair's return to the headlines: his public swipe at Starmer and Burnham over net zero and closer ties to Trump, the Tony Blair Institute&...

Send us Fan Mail The UK just hit 35°C and immediately fell apart. Again. Two Brits in 42°C Vietnam watch the chaos and ask why their home country can't cope with a warm day. The UK has broken its hottest-ever May record, and Jack and Adam break down the annual ritual: tropical nights, hosepipe bans, cancelled trains, and the genuinely serious cold-water-shock warnings as people get into diffi...

Send us Fan Mail Trump made 3,700 stock trades in 90 days while president. Nobody's talking about it. Plus Musk loses the OpenAI case, AI's $115 billion hole, and Southampton's spygate meltdown. Jack and Adam dig into Trump's Q1 2026 trading disclosure: 3,700+ transactions worth up to $750 million, timed suspiciously close to his own policy announcements on Boeing, Oracle, and...

Send us Fan Mail Reform's landslide just broke UK politics, and Farage's £5m gift could end it all. Two British expats break down a week of political chaos, fake food, and UFO committees. Jack and Adam unpack the 2026 UK local election earthquake: Reform's 1,400+ seat surge, Labour's collapse, Starmer clinging on, and whether Farage could actually become prime minister, just as...

Send us Fan Mail 162 classified UFO files just dropped — no aliens, no proof, no smoking gun. This week on Temporarily Scripted, a British comedy news podcast, Jack and Adam predicted it days before the Pentagon release and got into ancient Egypt, lost civilizations, consciousness, and the Hermetic principles. Plus: hantavirus killed three on a cruise ship and the media is running the pandemic pla...

Send us Fan Mail A World War II veteran says he regrets fighting for Britain.  Half of young Brits say they wouldn't do it either. Jack and  Adam sit with that one longer than usual — and it turns into  the most honest five minutes the show's had. Before that: Peter Mandelson's vetting got fast-tracked and  nobody in government wants to explain why, the UK is burning  through prime...

Send us Fan Mail AI deepfakes are now good enough that people genuinely can't  tell if a politician said something or not. That's where we  start this week. Jack and Adam break down how AI-generated videos of Starmer  and Trump are being used to manipulate political opinion, why  one in five UK teenagers are now too scared to share their  views online, and whether Keir Starmer summoning...

Send us Fan Mail NASA spent $30 million on a space toilet. It broke halfway to  the moon. There's a burning smell. Nobody knows why. This week on Temporarily Scripted, Jack and Adam dig into the  Artemis re-entry, the most expensive bog in human history, and  what the astronauts are actually surviving on up there — 189  food items, 43 cups of coffee, and five different hot sauces  that may or...

Send us Fan Mail The boys are back after a two-week break and the world hasn't  got any saner.  This week on Temporarily Scripted, Jack and Adam  unpack the Artemis moon mission (and ask whether we even went  the first time), the knock-on chaos from the Iran war hitting  UK petrol prices and medicine supplies, and Meta's $375 million  fine in New Mexico for harming kids on Facebook, Inst...

Send us Fan Mail Banksy's been unmasked. Reuters did a massive investigation and traced him back to an original arrest 20-30 years ago, plus eyewitness lineups in Ukraine.  The mystery artist might actually be Robin Gunning (later David Jones). We're diving into whether the anonymity made him more valuable than the actual art. This week on Temporally Scripted, we're covering the men...

Send us Fan Mail Oil's over $100 a barrel and we've all had to trade our cars for bicycles. Well, not really, but fuel prices are mental and Vietnam's government just abolished fuel duty while the UK is... raising it. Brilliant. This week on Temporally Scripted, we're covering why Trump keeps saying the Iran war will be "over tomorrow" (narrator: it wasn't), Star...

Send us Fan Mail America's gone into Iran, killed the Supreme Leader, and sent an armada to the Middle East. We're breaking down what's actually happening, the insane cost of shooting down $20K drones with $3M missiles, and whether this turns into another decades-long mess like Iraq and Afghanistan. This week on Temporally Scripted, we're covering the Iran situation (and why Tr...

Send us Fan Mail Prince Andrew's is now banned from riding horses. Because nothing says "I'm innocent" like giving up your favorite hobby on PR advice from your team. This week on Temporally Scripted, we're diving deeper into the Epstein files (it gets darker), the BAFTA Awards Tourette's incident that the BBC "accidentally" left unedited for 12 hours, and U...

Send us Fan Mail Prince Andrew arrested on his 60th birthday. Mate, you can't write this stuff. The first royal arrest since King Charles I in the 17th century, and Thames Valley Police picked the day he turned 60 to do it.  We're discussing what happens next, whether he'll actually face consequences, and if the Royal Family finally cuts him loose. This week on Temporarily Scripted,...

Send us Fan Mail The Epstein files saga just got deeper. Andrew Mountbatten Windsor — formerly known as the Duke of York, formerly known as Prince Andrew, formerly known as... no wait, that's someone else — is now under formal investigation by Thames Valley Police for allegedly leaking UK trade secrets to Jeffrey Epstein.  And the Royal Family broke their centuries-old media silence during a...