Stand and Deliver: A JoJo Podcast

This week, Joeny Joshter's stand finally manifests, as George and I get into the battle of Bamboo Vs Mario Pipes. They're clearly pipes, though, I mean look at those things. If that's supposed to be bamboo, the sweatshop children who animated this did a really shitty job. Just sayin'. We also take a detour to discuss some of the greatest cinematic achievements of our lifetimes. Then, in this week'...

It's time for a flashback episode! Everybody loves those! We get Gyro's tragic (?) backstory, and learn his true motivation for entering the Steel Ball Run. We also get a new thought experiment: Beard Or Metal Plates? Araki's odd predilection for drawing hair Like That is never going to stop befuddling us, apparently. We're sort of like babies, we have no concept of object permanence. Then, in Tok...

This week, Gyro and Johnny encounter a guy who turns things into bombs, and is named after a classic Latin song. What song? Oye Como Va, you idiot! What, you thought he should have been named La Bamba, because it sounds like BOMBS? Well, yeah, he probably should have! I have to assume Hirohiko Araki has a deep-seated grudge against either Ritchie Valens or Lou Diamond Phillips. Maybe both! Maybe h...

This week, we see the full debut of some weird things called "stands." You ever heard of such a thing? I think it's kind of a stupid idea, honestly, and I don't think they have any legs. Like, eventually you're gonna run out of ideas for these things and start throwing any old nonsense in there, and nobody will understand what's happening, especially if they have Brain Problems and can't remember...

We have two great episodes for you today, as we get an excellent blend of self-mutilation, autoerotic asphyxiation, and good ol' fashioned ethnic slurs. Johnny and Gyro encounter a family of Magneto-Freaks, while in Gridman, Computer-Satan tries to murder several children. Of course, the only way to battle him is by clickety-clacking at a keyboard that isn't attached to anything, and then shooting...

The Two Old Dipshits are back again, for the next ten episodes of JoJo's Bizarre Adventure! We may be getting even older and even more demented, but we'll always be here for you, the humble listener, unless we have something more important going on in our lives. Or if we die. At this rate, it's very likely that one or both of us will be dead before Steel Ball Run is over! And I'm not just saying t...

The two old bastards are at it again! We're 3 years older, and no years wiser, since the last time JoJo's Bizarre Adventure was on the air. Like a couple of unfrozen cavemen, we're thrust once again into Modern Pop Culture (based on a manga that started in the 1980s), as we pretend to understand that which frightens and confuses us. CORRECTIONS: When George was rambling about "Sagittarius," he mea...

It's the final showdown! And then it's the final showdown again! And then it's, uh, the end? Pucci really made a mess of things here. Along the way, we lament the mistreatment of Foo Fighters and I have to instruct George about proper footwear etiquette in Japan. We also do a final ranking of the Parts and discuss our favorite/least favorite characters of Stone Ocean. But, hey, this is it. A since...

This week, we watched the live-action adaptation of the first few episodes of Part 4! It's not good, and there's no reason for you to watch it! So in addition, we talk about games we've been playing recently. In my case, Atomic Heart (eh), and in George's case, JoJo All-Star Battle R (blech). Somewhere in-between, I get confused about the races of fictional characters. You know... Standard stuff....

This week, after George is done airing his grievances against his local GameStop, we continue the battle against Underworld, debate the merits of excessive profanity, and say goodbye to a member of the Stone Ocean crew... [Music used: Intro -- "Born Slippy" by Underworld | Outro -- "Just Another Day (Boingo Alive version)" by Oingo Boingo. Because there's life underground.]

We're back with the most nonsensical stand yet! Don't you hate when you get the Memento Disease and it makes your eyes not work? Well, that happens to Jolyne, after narrowly escaping an encounter with Pucci. Some other members of the crew aren't so lucky... By the way, the knives-fighting thing I mention, that George tried to gaslight me into thinking I had imagined, was a fight from Yu Yu Hakusho...

The end. Thank you for listening.

This week, we discuss Alien: Covenant, specifically which Fassbender we want to smooch the most. (Next week's Tokusatsu Roulette selection: Kamen Rider Zi-O, Episode 23) [Music used: Intro -- Hanging on the Telephone by Blondie | Outro -- All Night Operator by Bryan Ferry] [Anime Roulette theme: Roulette! by Electric Six]

Links to our Fear and Loathing at the Electronic Three 2019 videos: Microsoft: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZMuwBg81WI Bethesda: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R-LdL7fA_Ac Ubisoft: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTuu0AsWiA4 Nintendo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSVxme2QP30 Now, with that out of the way: Polnareff's back and Polnareff's dead. Trains are here, and a dog in a dress has the...

Please do not send me emails, I know the "saved by the bell" thing I mentioned is not real. I'm just attempting to gaslight George yet again. Anyway, SKET Dance fucking sucks so I just re-rolled and we got Hunter X Hunter again. Good decision! Meanwhile, we talk about Snatcher and Star Wars and whatever the hell else. I don't know what's going on any more. We're just waiting for JoJo to end at thi...

Last week sucked, but this week we're both feeling better, and trust me... This one goes to some weird places. Possibly our most legally-actionable episode yet! Hooray! (next week's Anime Roulette selection: SKET Dance, Episode 47) [Music used: Intro -- Haushinka by Green Day | Outro -- Wndrwll by Neil Cicierega] [Anime Roulette theme: Roulette! by Electric Six]

This week, after discussing the wild wild world of Funko Pops: We have an OVA that I thought was pretty good, but George disagreed, and then we had a Roulette where we were on the same page. Then, uh... Some other stuff happened. This is the Goofy Funko Pop that was mentioned: https://i.imgur.com/RnpCfGF.jpg (Next week's Tokusatsu Roulette selection: Doubutsu Sentai Zyuohger, episode 31) [Music us...

I talk about Star Track, George refuses to vamp while I look up quotes from Araki about drowning himself, and then we get back into the wide wide world of Anime Sports. (Next week's Anime Roulette selection: Reborn! episode 195) [Music used: Intro -- For Whom The Bell Tolls by Metallica | Outro -- That's How I Beat Shaq by Aaron Carter] [Anime Roulette theme: Roulette! by Electric Six]

We did it. We made it a full year without murdering each other or Hirohiko Araki. So sit back and enjoy our mega-sized anniversary episode, where we kick off Tokusatsu Roulette with a hell of a banger, and continue to reference things just obscure enough that I have to include clips of them. (Next week's Anime Roulette selection: Slam Dunk, episode 63) [Music: Intro -- Ride the Lightning by Metall...

This week, the JoJo anime people apparently decided to just lay all their cards on the table. They didn't know when to hold them OR know when to fold them. Anyway, a pink-haired guy talks into a frog. It's a good time. (Next week's Roulette selection: Kaitou Sentai Lupin Ranger VS Keisatsu Sentai Patranger, episode 25) [Music used: Intro -- Dancing With Myself by Billy Idol | Outro -- No Phone by...

This week contains more readings from Nick Smith's modern classic The Legend of the 10 Elemental Masters, because I guess that's just a regular thing now, and we consider a very lucrative new business proposition. Also a plane crashes and there are bike-abs. (Next week's Anime Roulette selection: Street Fighter II V, episode 20) [Music used: Intro -- Say You'll Be There by the Spice Girls | Outro...

This week, we deal with a fairly uneventful episode by discussing Jokers, Smokers, and Midnight Tokers. We also get back to rediscovering the magic of Ulillillia's modern classic, "The Legend of the 10 Elemental Masters". Plus, wrestling! (Next week's Anime Roulette selection: Yowamushi Pedal! episode 24) [Music used: Intro -- Juicy by Notorious B.I.G. | Outro -- Foreign Object by The Mountain Goa...

After about 20 minutes talking about the Stadia and DMC5, we get to a couple of kinda sucky episodes. At least the gayness is becoming more and more overt. That's the one good thing here. There's also a lot of Metal Gear talk in here. I know some people are into that. Side note: audio levels are a bit different here, my bars lied to me about our relative volumes. It'll be fixed next week, sorry fo...

I'm sick and George is drunk, as we learn more about how King Crimson works. Meanwhile, we talk about Devil May Cry, Zombie Bucciarati, and the newest attempt at making a watchable Ghostbusters movie. Then, Toriko happens. (Next week's Anime Roulette selection: Street Fighter 2: The Animated Series, Episode 19. N-n-n-nineteen.) [Music used: Intro -- Starless by King Crimson | Outro -- clip from Da...

We all feel the absence of Mr. Jimmy as it's back to just the regular two chucklefucks. Doesn't help that this episode is mostly a snooze, so instead we discuss the Mountain Dew Wiki some more. Thankfully, Bread Anime was here to save the day. (Next week's Anime Roulette selection: Toriko, episode 144) [Music used: Intro -- 21st Century Schizoid Man by King Crimson | Outro -- clip from A Mighty Wi...