Smeared Mascara Podcast

Smeared Mascara

Society EN ↓ 110 episodes

"Laugh with us, cry with us, smear your mascara with us." This podcast is hosted by longtime friends, Mandy and Brooke who have been born and bred in the San Francisco Bay Area.  These ladies love themselves some pop culture and drama which probably stems from their latchkey kid beginnings.  Their main news source is social media but their strong opinions always find their way into the conversation.  The topics are fueled by unmedicated ADHD and the language is always spicy.  So sit back and listen to your new favorite pop culture podcast, Smeared Mascara!

Author

Smeared Mascara Podcast

Category

Society

Podcast website

podcasters.spotify.com

Latest episode

Jul 10, 2026

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Episodes

Before Her Titties Sweat Off 10.07.2026

Send us Fan Mail Welcome back to your favorite pop culture pod, Smeared Mascara. This week the ladies come in hot with strong, chlorinated opinions. It’s summer, they’re perimenopausal, and lethal.  Brooke reminisces about her childhood and the significance of daytime soaps. Whatchu know about Port Charles in the 80s??? The latest Netflix documentary about a post-hysterectomy pregnancy is discusse...

Slam Pig Summer 25.06.2026

Send us Fan Mail It’s summertime and it’s slammin’. In case you couldn’t tell, we’re still in our Rhode Island slang era.  The pod took a few weeks off between recordings. There is so much to catch up on in this episode. TV, socials, slang, concerts and more!  This week you’ll hear about Brooke’s mortal enemy on the softball field… the sun. Can we get a quality sunscreen sponsor up in here, please...

Slam Pig! 09.06.2026

Send us Fan Mail Time to treat your ear drums to another episode of Smeared Mascara. This week you’ll hear about Starbuck’s inconsistent customer service. All we want is a hello and maybe a smile, ummmmkaaaayyy? Brooke shares her Florence and the Machine concert experience. Apparently Flo didn’t publicize the dress code.  Not everyone wears flowy dresses to a concert, Flo. Mandy hopes for the oppo...

Cheers To The Next Attempt 01.06.2026

Send us Fan Mail Hello friends and loyal listeners! It’s your favorite pod duo, Brooke and Mandy. In this episode you’ll hear us talk about another assassination attempt on the president. Can you believe how many times this man has cheated death? It’s quite impressive! There’s NO WAY any of this could be fake.  We touch on the biggest breakup of the spring season, Meg & Klay. Some people need...

There's Only Two Folds I Care About 14.05.2026

Send us Fan Mail Welcome back to your favorite podcast, Smeared Mascara. This week Brooke and Mandy talk about their activity levels during the golden age of FitBits, a trip to SoCal, and week one of Coachella. As always, there is an update on the latest government drama. What will Kash Money freak out about next? Will another movie “inspire” a bible quote used in a speech?  Kiss or Miss is back!...

Pantyhose and Ham 05.05.2026

Send us Fan Mail Welcome back to another episode of Smeared Mascara! Our technical department has been hard at work clearing storage and procuring new equipment to bring you more podcast gold. This week you’ll hear all about Easter plans and the lack of Instagram-able moments, fierce ass women in sports, high school drama, and how the political state of the US is still gross.  So break open those...

“Episode One, Season One” 14.04.2026

Send us Fan Mail It’s time for your regular dose of Smeared Mascara! This week you’ll hear the latest about the Secret Lives of Mormon Wives. Drama moves faster than a Mormon engagement in MomTok World.  Brooke and Mandy also talk about aging and the loss of one’s independence, TikTok content creation as an income stream, and upcoming protests. Of course there is major discussion about cats becaus...

Misophonia and Other Complaints 29.03.2026

Send us Fan Mail Welcome back to your favorite podcast, Smeared Mascara.  This week you’ll hear Brooke and Mandy discuss more Mormon Wives drama. It never ends with these people!   The hookups, the breakups… the content creation! The ladies get in depth about iPhone storage and the scam of it all. Can we just go back to landlines and note passing? You’ll also hear about the local St. Patrick’s Day...

Hashtag Hoe Weekend 13.03.2026

Send us Fan Mail Pack your bags, hoochies! We are going on a virtual weekend trip for the harlots, hoes, tramps, and hussies.  Those who are skank-curious are also welcome. As always, Brooke and Mandy comment on the current state of our federal dumpster fire. Please don’t stand too close to the toxic flames. The ladies make some consumer confessions during Kiss or Miss. Find out just how long the...

It's Not Quite A Cleveland Steamer 07.03.2026

Send us Fan Mail Welcome back to another riveting episode of Smeared Mascara! This week you’ll hear about world news interpreted by two middle aged MILFs, the latest sporty spice happenings, and another installment of Kiss or Miss.  Drop us a line to let us know where you stand on cannabis use at youth sporting events, and give us your opinion on open communication in the beauty industry.  So grab...

Winners Want to Shoot Themselves in the Weiners 26.02.2026

Send us Fan Mail It may seem like you’re hearing about the Olympics and Bad Bunny everywhere. This episode of Smeared Mascara is no exception.  Listen to Brooke and Mandy give a recap of their Super Bowl Sundays. You’ll hear about food, fun and of course the halftime show. ¡Guepa! You’ll also get the 411 about an Olympic skier’s alleged attempt at “inflating” his score.  You won’t want to skip thi...

Relational Nutrients 19.02.2026

Send us Fan Mail Bust out the pen and paper or open up that Notes app, because Smeared Mascara is helping you get your life together. You’ll hear how you can get shit done with a little help from your homies.  In this episode you’ll also hear Brooke and Mandy’s opinions on Grammy fashion. Did they watch the show? Nope. Are they gonna judge it? Yup.  The ladies will also let you know how they feel...

Cold As Balls 12.02.2026

Send us Fan Mail Brrrr, it’s cold in here. Feels like Smeared Mascara in the atmosphere! In this week’s episode you’ll hear how Brooke and Mandy are purging clutter for the new year. Look for an influx of disco balls and fur coats at secondhand stores near you!   Also discussed is how the Bay Area is pre-gaming for the Super Bowl. There’s plenty to do if you didn’t get tickets to the game.  So get...

The Spice Girls 05.02.2026

Send us Fan Mail Remember that time at your wedding when that famous singer called you out onto the dance floor and your mother-in-law rushed out and started dancing inappropriately with your husband? Well we weren’t there but we love seeing the memes about the Beckham wedding!  Welcome back to another episode of Smeared Mascara where Brooke and Mandy hyper focus on pop culture’s latest obsession....

It’s fine. Everything is fine. 30.01.2026

Send us Fan Mail Join Brooke and Mandy as they discuss pop culture and yucky politics. You’ll hear a riveting conversation about the movie Anaconda, birthday parties, and the latest in this country’s fuckery  So give us a listen if you need a break from reality. Sometimes all you can do is laugh when things are this bad. We really are a good time! For realsies! Rated DFA for Dumpster Fire Awarenes...

Snap That Wiener 15.01.2026

Send us Fan Mail Happy New Year from Smeared Mascara! Brooke and Mandy are entering 2026 in an organized and clear fashion. The ladies have some goals that are going to help them thrive in this new era of life. Listen as they share ideas that will hopefully inspire you to live a cuntier life.  Of course there are side conversations to hear, and duh, frankfurters are discussed… but would you expect...

Generational Turtlenecks 30.12.2025

Send us Fan Mail Brrrr, it’s cold outside and you should be wearing a turtleneck.  Listen up, homies! In this episode, the ladies of Smeared Mascara discuss a wide range of topics from obligatory gift exchanges to the power of a handsome face with a unibrow.  Brooke tells us about the Diddy documentary and how 50 Cent’s pettiness is helping bring this story to the masses. Mandy shares a story abou...

Bang Bang, Niner Gang 29.12.2025

Send us Fan Mail It’s time for the latest installment of your favorite pop culture podcast, Smeared Mascara. In this episode you’ll hear about digital etiquette, baby shower games, and political garbage. Brooke and Mandy will inform you of the latest on TikTok, Mormon Wives, and domestic conundrums.  So make sure your JZ Hair extensions are fastened well because you’re about to embark on a wild ri...

Titties and Tenders 02.12.2025

Send us Fan Mail Sorry for the delayed episode. The universe had Mandy in a figure four leg lock and it’s just now released.  In this episode you’ll enjoy hearing about recent Bay Area earthquakes, ICE displaying icy behavior, and other pop culture/political moments amplified by socials. Did you hear about the baby formula social experiment? If not, Brooke’s got it covered for you.  So sit back wi...

I'm Darlene, Who TF Are You? 21.11.2025

Send us Fan Mail New month, same skanks. You know how we do it. Brooke and Mandy talk about Halloween, the World Series (baseball, not poker), food insecurity, and meal planning. Cats are always a hot topic.  Meow.  Of course there’s more in this episode because when do we not interrupt each other and go off into random tangents? This is Smeared Mascara, baby. Put on your leg warmers and get comfy...

I Am The Main Ingredient 06.11.2025

Send us Fan Mail Welcome back to your favorite pop culture podcast, Smeared Mascara. In this episode you’ll hear Brooke read Mandy’s astrological chart, and they will analyze in detail why they’re superior to their haters. Brooke tells us about her experience at the No Kings protest, and Mandy describes her digestive detour on a roadtrip.   You will learn that a “healing haircut” is an actual thin...

Get Organized At Seafood City 29.10.2025

Send us Fan Mail In this eagerly anticipated episode, you’ll hear the calming sound of raindrops in the background as Mandy and Brooke laugh through their tears. Real life is still in the crapper and there’s no Pepto in sight.  The ladies discuss EMDR therapy and its benefits, but repeatedly call it by its club-kid name, EDMR. Perhaps ecstasy fueled raves were actually therapeutic environments aft...

Hoe-springa 08.10.2025

Send us Fan Mail Welcome back to the award winning pop culture podcast Smeared Mascara. This episode brings love, laughter and happily ever after because you’ve manifested this.  Brooke tells us about an organization she’s joined that Garfield the Cat would be proud of, and shares her ongoing admiration of Caleb Heron. (Do YOU know the Cooper story?) Mandy gives us the 411 on a local drag show, an...

Be Cool 30.09.2025

Send us Fan Mail In this highly anticipated episode of Smeared Mascara, you’ll hear Brooke and Mandy’s opinion on all things pop culture. Is Ricky Martin still living la vida loca? How far will MomTok go in Dancing with the Stars? You’ll have to listen to find out what these beezies think.  Brooke tells us the latest in high school drama, and teen bedroom design. Mandy unapologetically brags about...

Butt Stuff Stays With Me 20.09.2025

Send us Fan Mail New memory card, who dis?? It’s the award winning pop culture podcast, Smeared Mascara in the house! Get ready to hear about how our neck of the woods has been pawpin’ awf. Grocery store karaoke, football game drama carrying over to In n Out… Are we describing this week’s popular social media posts? Nope, this is real life, hunties. It’s high school football season in suburbia and...

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