Sex, God, & Chaos: Clinically Informed Faith-Based Addiction Counseling

TIMELINE 00:25 - Why we started this podcast 03:00 - The blessings and pitfalls of the "helper" position 07:55 - Samson Society Advertisement 08:55 - Attachment Theory 101: Understanding our design 13:34 - What is emotional disattunement? 14:35 - Can you have "good parents" and still have attachment issues? 18:00 - Emotional ignorance vs. emotional neglect 23:10 - The danger of the "Lone Ranger" a...

TIMELINE: 00:00 – Intro: The Mission of Real Recovery   00:56 – Robert Augustus Masters: To Be a Man   02:30 – Jesus as the Ultimate Soul Psychologist   03:59 – The Shame-Aggression Quote: A Deep Dive   06:37 – Churchianity vs. True Christianity   08:36 – Anger as a Defensive Strategy   10:40 – The Narcissism of Childhood vs. Adult Shame   13:09 – Core Shame Messages: "I am insignificant"   15:24...

00:25 — Podcast Mission 02:45 — Flipping the Digital Script: Using Microphones for Good 04:30 — Ad Break 06:30 — Defining Resilience: The Characteristic of an Alumni Community 08:15 — Simple Definitions: Resilience as the Ability to "Bounce Back" 10:45 — Breaking False Childhood Beliefs & Adult Capacity 14:20 — Shallow Faith: When the Rubber Meets the Road 18:50 — Generational Hardship: Lessons fr...

Chapter Timeline: 0:00 - The "Cheap Date" Intro 1:50 - George Barna’s Research: The 10 Stops 5:55 - Why 90% of Christians Get Stalled 8:45 - The Trap of "Churchianity" (Stop 5) 13:12 - The "Rescue Mission" 13:32 - Hopequest Advertisement 15:18 - The Gift of Resistance & The Dark Night of the Soul 17:38 - Moving From Idolizing Marriage to Worshipping God 25:08 - Personal Responsibility vs. The Syst...

Episode Timeline: 0:00 - Intro 0:28 - The Redemptive Power of Conversation 2:54 - Redefining Trauma in Modern Culture 3:17 - Advertisement 4:16 - Redefining Trauma (Continued) 8:57 - The Partner’s Perspective: Getting Unstuck 13:36 - Practical Tools: The Three Circles of Self-Care 17:10 - The Human Need to Be "Seen" 24:13 - Post-Traumatic Growth: A Spiritual Journey 29:16 - Processing vs. Resolvin...

 Resources mentioned:  • Sex, God, and Chaos (book) – available on Amazon  • Couples, men’s, and partner intensives at LifeWorks.ms  🎧 Listen with a partner—or come back to it more than once. This is a conversation worth sitting with.  Hashtags: #SexGodAndChaos #HonestyVsTransparency #RelationalHealing #BetrayalRecovery #EmotionalHealth #MarriageHealing #TraumaAndGrowth #Vulnerability #MensWork #...

CHAPTERS: 00:00 – Intro 00:26 – Opening Reflections on Friendship, Gratitude, and Survival 01:40 – Navigating Chaos, Betrayal, and Disorientation 03:28 – Introducing the Three Phases of Recovery 04:40 – Phase One: Bringing Order to the Chaos 06:20 – Emotional Dysregulation on Both Sides of Betrayal 08:05 – Vision, Intention & Means (Dallas Willard’s VIM Framework) 12:55 – The Role of Counselors, G...

#BetrayalRecovery #MarriageHealing #GraceAfterBetrayal #ChristianRecovery #EmotionalHealth #SexAddictionRecovery #RelationshipRepair #AddictionHealing #TraumaRecovery #MensRecovery #WomensRecovery #ShameHealing #AuthenticGrace #SpiritualBypass #ChristianMarriage #IntimacyRecovery #RecoveryPodcast #FaithAndHealing 00:30 – Welcome to Episode 61: Why We Keep Talking 02:56 – The Christian Word We Keep...

00:04 – Welcome 03:42 – Meaning vs. Significance   05:00 – Performance & Approval   14:22 – From Meaning to Significance   22:48 – God Gives Significance   31:38 – Emotional Regulation Tools   44:52 – Personal Significance & Healing   To learn more about the Sex, God, & Chaos team, click the link below: www.sexgodchaos.com Looking for help? Book an appointment with LifeWorks Counseling today:...

00:00 - Introduction 00:43 - Moving on from Cancer Conversations 03:11 - Finding Purpose in Adversity 05:17 - Understanding the Sexless Marriage 09:38 - The Role of Sex in Marriage 12:39 - Communication and Healthy Sexuality 16:36 - Navigating Complex Marital Issues 19:08 - Rejection: The Silent Catalyst in a Sexless Marriage 23:48 - Healing Wounds: The Journey Towards Healthy Sexuality 29:33 - Ho...

In this episode, Roane and Ben sit down for an honest update on Ben’s recent health challenges. Ben shares the journey from his 1997 cancer diagnosis to the long-term effects he’s facing today, including the discovery that most of his pancreas has shut down and the upcoming surgery to address it. They discuss how faith, community, and emotional awareness are shaping the way he navigates this seaso...

Ben and Roane discuss the concept of "spiritual bypass," a phenomenon where individuals use religious or spiritual language to avoid dealing with their emotional pain. They highlight how this practice is prevalent in faith communities and can be harmful, leading to a lack of accountability and genuine growth. Examples include phrases like "God's gonna use this" and "When God closes a door, he open...

Roane discusses the pervasive issue of pornography addiction with Ted Shimer, founder of the Freedom Fight. Ted highlights the significant impact of high-speed internet and smartphones on adolescent brains, leading to deeper and broader addictions. A Barna study reveals that 78% of practicing Christians aged 18-70 watch porn, with 90% of younger Christians affected. Ted emphasizes the need for dis...

Ben Derrick and Roane Hunter host the "Sex God and Chaos" podcast, discussing addiction and recovery. They are joined by Troy Haas, a guest speaker at a men's coaching weekend at Ebenezer Place. Troy shares his journey with addiction to sex, food, and substances, and how his life transformed after meeting Jesus in prison. He emphasizes the importance of community and vulnerability in overcoming ad...

Roane Hunter and Ben Derrick discuss the complexities of relapse in addiction recovery, emphasizing the importance of clear communication between partners. They differentiate between a slip and a relapse. Roane shares his 35-year recovery journey, highlighting the need for awareness, connection, and gratitude. They stress the significance of seeking professional help and maintaining accountability...

In this episode, Roane Hunter and Ben Derrick discuss Carl Lehenbauer's book "Fire and Song," which explores the Song of Solomon's deeper meanings and its relevance to modern marriages. Carl shares his journey of teaching the Song of Solomon, which led him to write a novel that integrates its themes into practical advice for marital intimacy. He emphasizes the importance of understanding the Hebre...

Roane and Eva Hunter host Joey and Elizabeth Maxon to discuss their journey through recovery from sex and porn addiction. Joey, a former PGA Tour golfer, shares his struggle with addiction. Elizabeth recounts the emotional turmoil of learning about Joey's addiction and their subsequent recovery process. They emphasize the importance of faith, community, and open communication in their healing. Joe...

In this episode, Roane and Ben discuss the importance of finding purpose and meaning beyond sobriety in recovery from sexual addiction. They emphasize the need for a deeper understanding of one's life and relationships, advocating for personal growth and intentionality. Roane shares his transformative experience with a Christian counselor and the divine calling he felt. They critique the quick-fix...

In this episode, Roane and Ben discuss emotional dysregulation, emphasizing its importance in recovery and life. They explain that emotional dysregulation means not being able to manage emotions under stress, often learned from childhood experiences. Men, in particular, struggle with emotional awareness, often turning to unhealthy coping mechanisms like pornography. They highlight the need for awa...

In this episode, Roane and Ben dive deep into the moment many encounter—the realization that they've "hit the wall." This wall represents the accumulation of unhealthy coping mechanisms and unmet desires, often rooted in a lack of guidance around relationships and sexuality. The conversation explores what to do when life makes you aware of the damage, whether through personal reflection or externa...

Tray Lovvorn discusses his complex journey. Tray's ministry, Undone, Redone, faced challenges when his second marriage to Melody ended in divorce after their reconciliation. Despite his efforts to reconcile and maintain transparency, his ex-wife accused him of infidelity and manipulation, leading to the collapse of their marriage and ministry. Tray underwent a polygraph and psychological evaluatio...

Ben, Roe, & Roane discuss the complexities of therapy, focusing on the importance of confronting and handling offensive feedback. They emphasize that growth requires resistance and that therapists should balance honesty with sensitivity. Men, in particular, struggle with receiving honest feedback, often shutting down or reacting defensively. The conversation highlights the need for therapists to c...

In this episode, Ben, Roane, and Roe discuss the complexities of engaging in therapeutic work, particularly in the context of addiction and relationship issues. They highlight the challenges faced by individuals and couples seeking therapy, including unrealistic expectations and the misconception that therapy can quickly resolve deep-seated issues. They emphasize the importance of consistent effor...

In this episode, we dive deep into the intricate relationship between fear and shame, exploring how these two emotions are intertwined and how they shape our lives. Roane, Eva, and Ben discuss how fear often lurks beneath shame, influencing everything from our actions to the masks we wear to gain acceptance. They share personal stories of wrestling with fear—from childhood anxieties to adulthood i...

  Action Items Consider individual and couple's work to address family of origin issues. Move towards acceptance of what has happened and build an intimate relationship based on full knowledge of one another. Continue having real, authentic conversations about ongoing struggles and needs for reassurance. Outline Addiction, change, and relationships. Ben Derrick and Ron Hunter discuss the complexit...