Segment City

This week on the podcast we ask a very simple question: Who would win in a fight, cavemen or astronauts? I feel like that’s enough of a hook that right now you already have lots of opinions on this, and you can bet Theo and Will do too! Tune in to hear us discuss stealing an Olympic baby and how the weight of visitors is changing tourism in Japan. Will also brings a wild story of a Norwegian espio...

We could have a whole kissing session while that big green man with big bolts in his neck looks on. And we could even get a burger and then makeout later in the Frankenstein museum! This week on the podcast, Theo and Will talk about Jerry Seinfeld’s new movie about the history of Pop Tarts, a Niagara Falls Burger King connected to a Frankenstein museum that has a Frankenstein roller coaster on its...

Fashion. Glamour. Throwing wine in people’s face. Known around the globe for being morons, the Kardashians have done it again with a new beauty treatment that involves injecting something quite unexpected into their faces. I’m not going to give it away here, you have to listen to find out! Thought I’d give it away for free in the episode description? Think again! This week on the podcast Theo and...

Looks like Airhead’s mystery flavor isn’t going to be a mystery for much longer, huh? What kind of arcane trickery creates such a candy? Could it be an industrial production efficiency that doubles as giving us weird flavors? Actually it’s probably exactly that. This week on the podcast, the boys talk about a dangerously boozy 4th of July sangria, how Bostonians really are, debunking the white “My...

Fame. Glory. The eternal love of dozens of live viewers. Just think your how your life could change forever if you were to win the Excel championships and show the whole world how much of a freak in the sheets you are. This week on the podcast Theo and will discuss the new DiGiorno and Deadpool pizza collab, as well as a new flavor of cotton candy that’s just hit the streets: Ranch. Will has the s...

Are we now part of a whale based cult? Maybe. Is the whale now part of our cosmology? Possibly. But was the seafood potluck they put on great? Absolutely. A little heavy on the krill though… This week on the podcast, Will and Theo talk about times they were disrespectful, how scams have progressed and yet have not, Renowned hot dog eating champion Joey Chestnut not going to a hotdog eating competi...

Put your hand in the box. What’s in the box, you ask? Pain. And Cheez. Mostly Cheez if we’re honest. Okay fine, there’s no pain it’s just a box of Cheez-Its, stop ruining this for me! This week on the podcast Theo and Will discuss the latest in Cheez-It technology, and Will has a scientific breakdown of what words are funny. Theo has a review of the Icon of the Seas, the biggest cruise ship ever t...

“Welcome back to QVC! The channel for selling strange products even though the internet exists. Today we have a… Buy 1 grill, get 10 free? This can’t be right. I know I’m breaking character but that’s a really dumb deal. What does the company get out of giving out free grills? Ugh. Whatever. Next we have a lobster shaped monster truck for sale…” This week on the podcast, the boys talk about “Furio...

Everyone dreams of attaining eternal glory. This can come in many forms, perhaps winning a major battle, or inventing the next life saving device. Or maybe all it takes is snapping a photo of a single small bird.  This week on the podcast Will and Theo discuss how life seems to slow down after listening to podcasts on 2x speed. Will has a story of a man who wrote the book on comedy and we’re here...

“Now just to make sure my AI knows my most intimate preferences so that it can date other people’s AI and find my perfect match… ‘If you don’t have a dump truck ass don’t apply.’ That should do it!” This week on the podcast, Theo and Will talk about Will’s embarrassing wader situation, the problem with glass ketchup bottles, what movies would be the funniest to be remade within the Cars Universe,...

Japan has a mascot for everything. Like literally, everything. A Jacuzzi faucet mascot? Check. One for the municipal train system? Check. A colon mascot to get your excited for your colonoscopy? You better believe that’s a check. This week on the podcast Theo and Will discuss a wide range of topics, starting with Marvel movies and their ongoing listlessness. Will brings up the question of differen...

“Time to get ready for my shower! I have my towel, my luffa, and of course, my lemon! I can’t wait to be sparkling clean (with a little pulp)! WAIT! Where’s my lemon?! Hopefully this lime will be an ok substitute…” This week on the podcast, the boys talk about strange TV commercials, what is the future of fast food, the nasty Japanese restaurant that shapes rice balls with young women’s armpits (p...

Birds. You know them. You love them. But have you ever thought about trying to catch them all? Some say if you do, you are granted the title of Ultimate Bird Nerd for all eternity. This week on the podcast Theo has a breakdown of Everything Bagel with Cream Cheese Ramen, and Will has an amazing tale of a group of extreme birders who attempt to see as many birds in a day as they can. From meticulou...

Can a man get limbs blown off, had his eye taken out, and escape a POW camp well into his old age? Only if you are the most daredevil soldier who ever lived! Join us this week and you to can realize what a baby you really are! This week on the podcast, Theo and Will talk about “Boondock’s Saints”, a write in stupid thought about headlights being car’s eyes, Pringle’s collaboration with Crocs inclu...

You ever go to the circus and see a man swallow a knife? And then of course you think to yourself — that looks easy, I bet I could do that. If so, please see a mental health professional, I cannot stress this enough you in no way should just try swallowing knives in your free time. If our podcast has done nothing else, please let this message reach someone. This week on the podcast Will and Theo d...

“Dr. Eggman, for the crime of turning animals into robots, this Court sentences you to do a series of diabetes Public Service Announcements!” “But… I don’t have diabetes!” “Then maybe you should see someone because if anyone has diabetes, it’s you…” This week on the podcast, the boys talk about Anime Boston, how romantic comedy movies fit into the “uncanny valley”, IHop’s collaboration with Sonic...

Nectar of the Gods. Modern Mummification. The taste of Nothing. How? Why? Stop asking so many questions and come into our pyramid. This week on the podcast Theo and Will discuss the latest, and worst, ideas from Wendy’s, a story of a gator visiting a ballpark, and in the latter half of the episode we stumble across what might be one of the most unhinged websites we’ve ever come across.  Email us a...

…And honestly, in this day and age it’s hard to find people doing good scientific work! Well, I say good, but really it's more on the evil side. And by evil I mean stupid. Very stupid. This week on the podcast, Will and Theo talk about a Russian man who taught Spanish at Will’s highschool, read up on what month people are most like to die, genetic engineering has gone awry as “Personal Pineapples”...

New! From the idiots who bring you Segment City comes a new podcast that will change your life for the better. Have you been out on the beach scouring the rocks for bits of metal trash? Is your family pleading with you, “please father, just come inside, there’s a hurricane can’t you see?” Well we’re here to help! This week on the podcast Theo and will contemplate new Peeps flavors, KFC’s latest cr...

You ever just need to be alone with your thoughts with your soup, uninterrupted by children? We completely get it. You're with friends here. This week on the show Theo and Will discuss different monodiets and the perils that may come with them. Will takes us through the history of the Bermuda Triangle, and Theo unveils new rules for 2024!

It's hard being a Goblin. Nobody respects you. Everyone looks down on you (literally). And their always stealing my trinkets! But one day they'll see! I'll be a singer and make my Goblin noises where they will be appreciated! This week on the podcast, the boys talk about Theo’s tussle with an extra spicy chicken sandwich, Will’s Yankee Swap debacle featuring a maligned bag of frozen Ikea meatballs...

“Ah, I see you have found my tree top castle tree house. Though you will find that you were a fool to come in here with all that tasty blood of yours- Is that an acorn? Even though I’m a vampire now, I’m still a squirrel. How about we trade the acorn for letting you live. Deal?” This week on the podcast, Will and Theo talk about what constitutes a Christmas stocking stuffer, news stories of car si...

In this week’s episode we have a deep dive on the like of Rocky Aoki, a top contender for title of Most Interesting Man in the World. Founder of Benihana, speed boat racer, balloon pilot, and so many other monikers that are too many to list. We also run you through a WikiHow on how to be annoying, tune in to see if you might unwittingly qualify. Email us at segmentcitypodcast@gmail.com Twitter: ht...

“... It’s a tough competition this year at ‘The World’s Most Condescending Person’ competition! Despite France winning the majority of years, it might be- No, it looks like a French man won it again! And a physicist no less! Remind me to send him some congratulatory cigarettes…” This week on the podcast, the boys talk about how media keeps repeating itself, a Tumblr user’s list of “Phrases you can...

It’s a holiday roundup! This week’s podcast has entirely Christmas and holiday themed segments, just in time for you to sit around the fire with your family and all tune in to Segment City. Theo has a report of a Taco Bell holiday party that went completely off the rails, and a collection of festive Florida Man stories. Will has a bundle of Santa crime news stories, and an edition of Amazon Erotic...