Secure Marriage Podcast

It’s took us a little while, but we’ve finally made it to our 100th episode! This podcast has been one of our favorite thing to do together, and we hope you’ve found it entertaining and maybe a little helpful in your relationship. To celebrate, we thought we should give away something cool and awesome and life changing. All the details are in this week’s episode of the Secu...

It’s the little things that make or break a marriage… like chores. Ironically, it’s not about the chores. It’s about the disappointed expectations. It’s about feeling used or unappreciated. It’s about the family systems you grew up in clashing with the family system your spouse grew up in. Chores mean so much more than just dirty socks and dishes. In this episod...

Even though they can drive you crazy at times, children can be a blessing in your marriage. But what happens when you and your spouse disagree on having kids? For some couples, this can be a deal breaker in the relationship. In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, we’ll help you understand why the “kids conversation” is different than other shared values conversa...

If your marriage has been a struggle, you may find ourself sitting in marital remorse (it’s sort of like buyer’s remorse). The brand new, shiny husband your wife you drove off the lot starts to fade and they don’t look like such a wise “purchase” anymore. If you let marital remorse go unchecked, it can start to significantly ruin your relationship In today’s epi...

So, your husband or wife says they want to lose some weight. Then you watch them make multiple trips into the kitchen to grab some cookies after dinner. What do you do? Do you tell them to stop it? Do you hide the cookies? When you see them doing things that are self-sabotaging, how do you support them in their goal WITHOUT sounding critical? This is the touchy topic we tackle in the latest episod...

(Shannon wanted an entire episode all about her, but she didn’t want to admit it, so this is what we did.) This year has been a monumental year for my wife. Listen in and hear about some of the monster goals she’s set for herself and what’s it’s taken for her to overcome the internal (and external) obstacles and how she’s totally crushed them.

For many marriages, traveling usually causes conflict and fights. In this episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, listen in as we talk about our latest 27 hour road trip where we enjoyed ZERO conflict (and how you could do it too).

Having your spouse angry at you is hard enough. When it happens in public or in front of family or friends, you add the feeling of embarrassment and shame. What should you do? Yell back? Hide? Explain or excuse their outburst? In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, you’ll hear how we had to deal with this issue in our relationship and learn the best way to get things resolv...

Believe it or not, and despite our best efforts, some people have told us they really don’t like our podcast. But it’s probably not for the reason you’re thinking. If you want to find out why, check out this week’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast.

When you’re in a difficult marriage, one of the hardest decisions you face is whether to separate to continue to stay together. Hurt feelings, constant conflict, intense emotions… all of these make the decision even harder. In this episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, we look at the major issues that factor into the decision and a few parameters to help you decide when it’s be...

Fighting with your husband or wife is hard enough. But when they threaten you with divorce, your survival brain kicks in and it’s a thousand times harder to resolve the issue you’re fighting over. In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, we’ll explore why people resort to threatening divorce and what you can do if this happens to you.

When something goes wrong for your spouse, do you feel yourself bracing because you know it’s just a matter of time before you end up being blamed for it? This can be an exhausting and demoralizing way to relate to your husband or wife. In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, Shannon and I talk through our own struggle with blaming each other for our own misfortunes and what...

When you’re hurt, finding forgiveness isn’t always easy. You want your husband or wife to admit they were wrong, that they understand how you feel, and demonstrate genuine remorse and contriteness. Unfortunately, their survival brain makes it really hard to do that right away. In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, we’re looking at forgiveness and why it can be...

Have you ever wanted to do something really badly but your spouse wasn’t on board? For many couples, this can lead bitterness, resentment, and some pretty good fights. But it doesn’t have to be that way. In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage podcast, we’ll show you can work through the issue kindly and respectfully, even when you and your spouse aren’t on the same...

Despite being a trained professional counselor with years of experience helping couples fix their marriages, last Saturday, Shannon and I got into a HUGE fight over a stupid text. If you want to see who won, you’ll want to listen to today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast. We hope you enjoy.

Keeping secrets from your spouse rarely turns out well… especially when it concerns meeting up with your ex when your spouse is out of town. In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, we’re tackling the tough issue of rebuilding trust and how to prioritize your spouse’s feelings over everyone else’s feelings.

Every couple fights. So when do those fights cross the line and become emotionally abusive? Or, if you know they’ve already crossed the line, what can you do to keep yourself safe? In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, we want to help inform those that may be feeling helpless and hopeless in their toxic relationships.

Very few things are as devastating as hearing your husband or wife wants to end the marriage. What do you do? Do you fight for the relationship? Do you let them go? How do you deal with the deep feelings of abandonment and betrayal? Today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast takes a sober look at a situation many of you have had to face.

You may not know this, but for a lot of couples, sex is pretty important (insert sarcastic look here). And when sex is experienced less and less it can lead to all sorts of nasty problems in your relationship. In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, we look at why some marriages lose their sexual intimacy and, more importantly, what to do to start repairing things in bedroom.

You hear people say all the time “I’ve fallen out of love”. Worse yet, they use that reason to end their marriage, hoping to “fall in love” with someone else. That’s not how “love” is supposed to work. Feeling of love are supposed to go from heated, passionate, crazy-stupid attraction to the sustainable warmth of intimacy and companionship. In this e...

Sometimes, your spouse just bugs the crap out of you. Everything they do frustrates or disappoints you and it’s nearly impossible to see any good in them. This negative attitude can grow like a cancer until it starts to eat at you from the inside out. If this sounds familiar and you’ve been wanting to do something about it, this episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast is for you. In our...

If you’ve been married for any amount of time, you know that the “feelings” can start to fade and things feel a little… boring. For some people, that disappointment causes them to become restless and desire something (or someone) new. If that’s happened to you, what are you supposed to do with those feelings? In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, we...

Once you get married, should you do everything together? How can you keep your individualism while still being married? CAN you be an individual while you are married? SHOULD you try to be an individual while in a marriage? The answers to these questions may not be as easy as you think. In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, we’re answering a question we saw on a Facebook M...

Chores are one of the most common things couples fight over. What can complicate the debate is when a wife starts working from home and she doesn’t have as much time. In today’s episode of the Secure Marriage Podcast, we’re looking at the age-old debate on roles and expectations and disappointments and communication and conflict resolution all focusing around the question, &#8220...

Gentlemen. If you want your wife to be happier, more attracted to you, and have less fight, you only have to do ONE thing. Start actively trying to improve yourself. It doesn’t matter if it’s books, counseling, talking with friends, or superbly produced and highly engaging marriage podcasts. When you wife sees you working on yourself, she will feel more loved and appreciated. If you wa...