Says Who?

Oh hello, SaysWhovia! You caught us at home! How fortunate. It’s been… 50 days? Something like that. And here we are. Dan and Maureen are doing pretty well. There is the usual talk of bleach and masks. They discuss the need to keep busy and the feeling of not getting anything done. After all, one must count one’s beans and clean the doorknobs. But! There are other things going on! More traditional...

Here we are again, SaysWhovia! Back on the sofa at the Says Who coffee shop! What? You never noticed the coffee shop? It’s always been here.  Always.  And there’s Dan and Maureen drinking out of really big mugs! They’re here to walk you through the week’s events including when you'll finally be able to get that facial and go bowling in Georgia. Or, the history of Pier 1 Imports! And the show Frien...

It’s…*checks calendar* *calendar bursts into flames*… who knows? Does it matter? It’s some day of the week! It’s SAYS WHO DAY! What’s been going on with Dan and Maureen? Well, Dan’s been making masks. And Maureen went to the store one time! But no one can live at this rapid pace for long, so they are going to relax and talk about stuff they remember. Like biking around the neighborhood, and riding...

Well, SaysWhovia, here we are again! At home. Where we have been, and will be for the time being. Remember out? No, neither do we. But it’s okay! Dan and Maureen are here to talk about at home stuff, in details. Grocery wiping! Mask etiquette! Nightly wipings! Other things that didn’t exist before! But, as always, SaysWhovia is a completely safe place to visit. You can come and go as you like. No...

*Wipes down pod catcher* Oh hello! We were just making this nice and clean for you! SaysWhovia is always a safe retreat. Dan and Maureen are doing fine, in terms adjusted for these times. Maureen is trying to record in a bedroom with a dog who has woken up. She is… very awake. She wants to play. Oh, and Maureen injured her eye. You’re going to hear a lot about that. Dan is doing the same sort of t...

*door creaks open* Oh hello!  Let us take your bags. Welcome to Castle SaysWhovia, your safe port in the storm. Come in, come in! Yes, we’re all in here together, but there is plenty of room at the castle. Come, sit by the fire. Dan and Maureen will tell you stories. Mostly Maureen, She’s pretty chatty. And you can admire Dan’s beard! Look how it shines in the firelight! They talk indoor life, pla...

Greetings from a medically safe distance, SaysWhovia! It’s been A WEEK, right?  Like, what did we even think other weeks were before this week? It is, to put it mildly, a lot to take in. Which is why we’re here, to bring some sunshine to your earholes!  Or something.  We’re bringing something.  Dan is getting help with the recording. Maureen just wants you to stop eating the carpet. Both are here...

Oh hello, SaysWhovia. We were just bleaching everything. Sit down here, on this nice clean seat. We boiled it. Yes, you know what we’re talking about—the coronavirus. It’s the most popular microbe around. We don’t want to freak anyone out, except maybe the entire Trump administration who do not seem to be aware that it is happening. Which is why they all went to CPAC and coughed all over each othe...

Oh, don’t mind us, SaysWhovia. We’re just bleaching this podcast before you listen. It’s going to be very clean. We want you to know that our podcast is entirely safe to consume and free of viruses. Because that’s on a lot of people’s minds. Especially Dan. Dan is ready. No one is as ready as Dan. Not you, and not the government, or Mike Pence, or the CDC or anyone. Maureen has been getting on and...

It’s the end of February! And in 2020, that means we are sandwiched between primaries and debates like some kind of Arby’s “we’ve got the meats” scenario except instead of meats it’s just unrelenting campaigning. Maureen is back from her vacation. She saw a boat! She saw a fish! She didn’t see the last debate, but that’s okay! Dan will fill her in. Michael Bloomberg continues to be the Frye Festiv...

Ahoy, SaysWhovians! It’s the Good Ship Good News! It sailed into our port. It’s been so long since we’ve seen it. Dan has visited Disneyland. Maureen is on vacation. Today, they will speak only of happy things. That’s what Dan has planned. Well. There will be a few little things. Like John Bolton’s book. And Stephen Miller’s weird wedding. But nothing will get in the way of… What’s that noise? Mau...

*yawns*  *blinks*  Oh hello, SaysWhovia. Have you been there all this time? Dan and Maureen have just woken up. They are in separate places—separate times, in fact—but neither seems to have left noddy-noddy-slumberland. Can you blame them? It’s 2020. Let’s all go back to bed. But we can’t, can we? There is too much to discuss. The New Hampshire primary! The end of the Yang Gang! Joe Biden’s Wild R...

Hey ho, SaysWhovia! Did you like last week? Did you? That was a week, right? A week in which time seemed to collapse into a single point. The singularity of bullshit. It was something else. The impeachment trial has ended. Long live the impeachment trial. Dan is now finished with impeachment.fyi and his self-imposed 130-day stretch of total impeachment immersion. He’s fine. He’s absolutely fine. D...

What a week! Maureen was on tour. Dan was handling the impeachment! Everything went great! Errrr. Well. Maureen went on 2/3 of a tour, then Things Went Wrong. Dan has been trapped in his basement, watching endless hours of Senate testimony. Both have made choices they regret. But! What news? The defense has wrapped in the Senate trial, and now we are on to questions. And a little gnome named John...

Look, there's a lot going on. Today Dan was consumed by the impeachment trial which officially began and Maureen was consumed by the release of her new book The Hand On the Wall which officially came out.  It's just a waves hands in all directions kind of day in a waves hands in all directions kind of week, month, year, take your pick.  Anyway, Maureen wants to talk impeachment and Dan wants to ta...

When we last left Dan and Maureen, they were, like most people, kind of freaking out because oh no surprise war. But then everyone kind of forgot or something and anyway, here we are, SaysWhovia! 2020 is clearly trying to make itself known, to show it is different and weirder than 2019. We don’t know what that means either. But soft! There is much goodness. Dan has many tales of Says Who U. Mauree...

Jeepers, 2020 got off to a start. Dan and Maureen are back for thee first 2020 podcast, and they are…well…a bit uncertain how to address what the first seven days of the new year have been like. Spicy? Eventful? Something else? But they have made personal strides. Dan has discovered the joys of the bullet journal. Maureen is getting things done and having strangers over to the house to help! Lots...

Should all Trump’s tweeting be forgot And never come to mind! It’s 2020 now my scrotes Let’s leave that shit behind! Yes, Sayswhovia, it’s a new decade! That was easy! We just woke up one day and, BAM! New decade! What did we learn in this last week of 2019? We learned that SaysWhovia is the best, that Trump is very bad at giving gifts, that Presidential libraries are weird, and that 2020 will hav...

We did it! It’s happened! TRUMP HAS BEEN IMPEACHED! And now… Well. For a start, Dan is broken. He’s been working in his workshop day and night, watching the hearings, making crafts for good SaysWhovians, and going ever so slowly insane. He sleeps in a pile of cardboard and printed out transcripts. Maureen watched a bunch of it, but not all. Together, they work out what it all MEANS. Trump has been...

Grab a plate, SaysWhovia. Dan and Maureen have been busy cooking up some news and are ready to dish it out. What would you like? Some hot, buttery Trump leaving NATO after getting picked on? Got it. We’re passing around some FBI documents, if you want to grab a few. Would you like some UK election news on that? Let us pour some on. We’ll be slicing up the impeachment any moment. Which is our way o...

Jingle, jingle, SaysWhovia! Dan and Maureen had a few issues getting the recording done this week. Dan threw a pair of scissors, then the internet broke, like, twenty times. So our friends are not as well as they might be. But it’s all fine, for this is the season of glad tidings and joy. That is what Maureen is here to remind Dan. Dan has other things to remind Maureen. He wants her to know, for...

Oh, hello, SaysWhovia. We were just putting out the plates. There’s turkey and pie, and potatoes, and, why, I think we have a little impeachment left in the fridge. Yes, it’s Thanksgiving! The holiday of feasting! Of pie! Of traffic! Of jumping over the table to wrestle another relative to the ground! Here in SaysWhovia, we celebrate communally. Everyone is invited. Dan and Maureen have been cooki...

Oh no. Oh dear. It’s finally happen. We’ve broken Dan. It’s too much. It has been a week of hearings and news, and a very long day of hearings and news, and now Dan and Maureen are recording after twelve hours of hearings and they are not okay. What have they learned? They are not sure. But they’ll try to explain it anyway. Please help them.   *** Dan's tracking impeachment news and sending out up...

Ding ding! It’s a special Says Who bonus episode. As we’ve entered into the impeachment hearings, Dan and Maureen are here to watch and walk you through. Because this is going to be a lot. A lot of what? Well, a lot of bow ties, and recitation of things we’ve heard, and bullshit. And a lot of water. So much water. Giant bottles of water. Listen to the story of two nerds doing their duty, dealing w...

Great googliemooglies, SaysWhovia, are we in for a week! Impeachment time is here. This will be a week of hearings, tweeting, and a whole lot of info dumps and nonsense. It’s also going to be cold all get out for a lot of us, so we will be huddled indoors, watching democracy or something! Who knows? Who knows? Well, Dan knows! Probably. He seems to. This is going to be a big week for impeachment.f...