Rock-n-Roll Autopsy

The boys discuss Dee Snider’s desire to depart with dignity, childishly laugh at ding dong double entendres, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Chuck Berry’s 1972 novelty hit, “My Ding-a-Ling”

The boys suffer flying smartphone related injuries on stage, patiently wait for adequate birthday accumulation, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Bonham’s 1989 Zeppelin-esque rocker, “Wait for You”

With scalpel in hand, our fearless host attempts to re-engage in rock n’ roll reanimation, reassess two critically maligned Rush albums — “Presto” and “Roll the Bones” — and reconfigure the remaining pieces into one cohesive kick-ass slab of post-synth era Rush n’ roll.

The boys unnecessarily remake iconic music, catch a whiff of hypocritical platitudes, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Lynyrd Skynyrd’s 1977 southern rock classic, “That Smell”

The boys teach Geddy Lee the intricate bass nuances of “Christine Sixteen”, abuse their industry dominating podcasting power to shamelessly exploit independent artists, and sort of use the scientific method to determine if streaming killed rock ‘n roll. Featuring Nick Smith from StageDive.

The boys bag groceries with Dave Grohl, join a conspiratorial underground revolution, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Queensrÿche’s 1988 prescient prog rocker, “Spreading the Disease”

The boys hide teenage tube socks from Mom, dish the dirt on Diana, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Michael Jackson’s 1987 slanderous hit, “Dirty Diana”

The boys change diapers at Download, chip their teeth on Chips Ahoy, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Pat Benatar’s 1980 pop rocker, “Hit Me with Your Best Shot”

The boys hike their britches up to their nipples, lament the death of the rotary phone, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Neil Young’s 1994 grunge rocker, “Piece of Crap”

The boys buy a billion dollar ear-worm, lead a police chase with Space Ace, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of the autobiographic 1987 single, “Rock Soldiers” by Frehley’s Comet.

The boys share inappropriate pictures on social media, yarl unintelligible lyrics about Mom’s Daddy issues, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Pearl Jam’s 1991 iconic grunge classic, “Alive”

The boys lack theatre etiquette in the Dawg Pound, deal drugs with Elvis on the Sunset Strip, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Ratt’s 1988 bluesy sleaze rocker, “Way Cool Jr. ”

The boys build a budget telecaster, debate the cause of mandible related maladies, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Judas Priest’s 1984 heavy metal classic, “Jawbreaker ”

The boys liberate themselves from the shame of self-service, decide that Billy Corgan is their only worthwhile podcasting peer, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Cyndi Lauper’s 1984 self-gratifying hit, “She Bop”

The boys join Flea for a frantic fecal adventure, debate the lyrical depth of Bret Michaels, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Poison’s 1990 pumpin’ pop hit, “Unskinny Bop”

The boys analyze anal vapors with Vessel, debate the appropriateness of derrière devotion, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of PotUSA’s 1995 bodacious B-side, “Carolyn’s Booty”

The boys referee a septuagenarian street fight, struggle to appropriately identify reproductive anatomy, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Primus’ 1995 alt-rock hit, “Wynona’s Big Brown Beaver”

The boys play air guitar to prerecorded Motley Crue, put some distance between themselves and lecherous teenagers, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of The Police’s 1980 reggae rocker, “Don’t Stand So Close to Me”

With scalpel in hand, our fearless host attempts to trim away the bloat and mediocrity from Gun N’ Roses and Metallica’s infamously overstuffed double albums, “Use Your Illusion” and “Load/Reload” and combine what’s left into one cohesive kick-ass album of mid-nineties hard rock n’ roll.

The boys engage in wildly reckless KISS speculation, stalk Playboy bunnies at the supermarket, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Blondie’s 1978 new wave knockout, “One Way or Another”

The boys snort a mountain of blow, rerecord a classic podcast just to spite one another, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Eric Clapton’s 1977 reluctant anti-drug blues rocker, “Cocaine”

Without the guardrails of science to fall back on, the boys deviate from their typicality prudent decision making in favor of deliberately provocative, sensational, and often ridiculous hot takes about a few of their favorite rock ‘n roll bands.

The boys compile a list of clickbait worthy metal songs, get sassy in go-go boots, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Nancy Sinatra’s 1966 chart-topping, foot-stomping hit, “These Boots Are Made for Walkin'.”

The boys audition several iPads for their upstart rock ‘n roll band, lament the absence of free chicks in their chosen vocation, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Dire Straits’ 1985 MTV smash hit, “Money for Nothing.”

The boys wear spandex to a retirement party, impress Michael Jackson with lame fat jokes, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of “Weird Al” Yankovic’s 1988 portly pop parody, “Fat.”