Returning to Us

Earlier in the season, Lauren discussed the Sympathetic Nervous System ( Fight or Flight ) and the Parasympathetic Nervous System ( Rest & Digest ). Everyone experiences the highs and lows of our nervous system being overstimulated. But, how do you calm back down and return to the window of tolerance? In this episode, Lauren explains the Polyvagal Theory which suggests that the vagus nerve can...

All children act out for a reason, even if you can’t understand it in the moment. Today Lauren looks at the five needs areas that, when unmet, are the cause of those challenging behaviors.  Lauren outlines each of the 5 needs, how children present when a need is not met, and makes suggestions on ways to meet that need.  Mentioned in this episode:  Podcasts:  Mindful Mama Podcast Podcast — Laura Fr...

Many of us are already stressed out with work, taking care of family, and all the other life things. Then, your child says something that hurts your feelings. It’s a difficult experience to deal with especially when you have to deal with their intense emotional outbursts, too.  Lauren discusses the seventh of her “ 7 Disarming Communication Tactics ” in this episode: the “I feel….” Strategy . Part...

When problems come up or children misbehave, effective communication is key to changing the situation. Can writing a note to a child with good old pen and paper be effective?  It sure can!  Lauren discusses the sixth of her “ 7 Disarming Communication Tactics ” in this episode: the “Written Note” Strategy . Part of the reason this strategy works is because it removes any tone or emotion from the m...

You find dirty clothes all over your kiddo’s bedroom floor. What do you say? And how do you say it? Information gives your child facts about something and helps them to make a decision. Instructions are about telling your child what to do. A blunt, straightforward order with no option for discussion. Which is better?  Lauren discusses the fifth of her “ 7 Disarming Communication Tactics ” in this...

Do you find yourself talking, lecturing, or repeating yourself to your kiddos? Resulting in getting annoyed and then raising your voice or yelling? Stress! How about a new strategy?  Lauren discusses the fourth of her “ 7 Disarming Communication Tactics ” in this episode: the “One Word” Strategy . Instead of lecturing or repeating yourself, try using one-word reminders to help guide their behavior...

Getting kids to communicate. We all use so many strategies to try and motivate our children to talk with us. We do our best to ensure we capture their interest so they participate. Here's another strategy to add to your tool belt!  Lauren discusses the third of her “ 7 Disarming Communication Tactics ” in this episode: the “Humor” Strategy . Lauren talks about how humor can be used to improve...

Communication is a two-way street. As we talk with kiddos, we are also teaching them how to talk with others. When it comes to teaching kids communication skills, the younger the better!  Lauren discusses the second of her “ 7 Disarming Communication Tactics ” in this episode: the “Choices” Strategy . Part of this strategy is giving your kiddo choices and being involved in the decision. This optio...

Great communication with your children results in stronger relationships, greater cooperation, and feelings of worth and value. As adults, we have no problem dishing out instructions but that takes away all of the child’s control and ownership. This often leads to kids that don’t listen.  Lauren discusses the first of her 7 Communication Tactics in this episode: the “I see…”  Strategy. Part of thi...

Communication is 70-90% nonverbal. Body language and tone of voice communicate much more than words alone. Lauren discusses body language during this episode and why it’s so important when talking with kids. You might think your kiddo is not listening, but they are definitely observing your body language!  There are both positive and negative types of body language. Often, you can tell someone’s a...

In the last few episodes, Lauren explained about the Sympathetic Nervous System ( Fight or Flight ) and the Parasympathetic Nervous System ( Rest & Digest ). Both are part of our Autonomic Nervous System (ANS), but let’s not get too sciency here! Just remember this: it’s all about keeping this system in balance.  In this episode, Lauren explains what adults can do when they are stuck in either...

In the episode, Lauren discusses the Parasympathetic Nervous System (PNS) and how it helps balance us out, get our rest and digest our food.  The PNS has a calm and rest effect on our bodies. Think of it as a superhero! It slows us down, calms us, and does the opposite of the Fight or Flight/SNS part of our brain. We are all thankful for that! We can get stuck in Fight or Flight mode due to chroni...

Lauren interviews Alyssa Mairanz , Owner/Executive Director of Empower Your Mind Therapy , a group therapy practice in NY City. Lauren asks questions many listeners and clients have mentioned: What do you do if your Primary Care Physician thinks a behavior is normal?  How do you know when a child needs therapy? How do you find a therapist for your child? Or for yourself? How do you find the “right...

In this episode, Lauren discusses the Sympathetic Nervous System (SNS) and how it keeps us safe. The SNS is the “ Fight or Flight ” part of your brain. It’s the pathway we use to respond to danger, which means it keeps us safe. This is a good thing!   The problem today is we are often pushed into SNS mode even when not physically in danger. What causes this?   Daily stressors. Lack of control. Exc...

Emotion Regulation: The ability to exert control over one's own emotional state. If only it was as easy as it sounds! Emotions are controlled and processed at an unconscious level or “bottom” of the brain. We become more aware of this fact when we strengthen the Thinking Brain or “top” of the brain. A dual approach (top-down and bottom-up) deals with underlying issues and has more lasting res...

What is the brain’s hypothalamus? Lauren likes to call it the Cortisol Control Hub .  The hypothalamus is responsible for hormone release and homeostasis, which is for maintaining body equilibrium. Its functioning helps to regulate many areas: emotions, sleep and wake cycles, body temperature, and eating/not overeating .  Cortisol is a hormone released when you are stressed . It’s also responsible...

Ever wondered why a scent or certain food triggers a memory  of something that happened long ago?  Well, that’s the hippocampus in play AKA Memory Storage Command Center . The hippocampus stores things like spatial memories (surroundings & environment) as well as declarative memories (facts & events). An example of declarative memories are things learned in school! Memory consolidation hap...

In this episode, Lauren talks about the Amygdala . This part of your brain is TINY but oh my…..it is MIGHTY!  The Amygdala is the emotional decision maker of your brain. Its job is to protect you at all costs. Whenever we face strong emotions like anger or fear, the Amygdala believes we are in danger and sounds the alarm. This misinterpretation puts your Thinking Brain on hold. The "stress th...

In this episode, Lauren talks about how to teach your kiddos about the emotional brain and its functions by using a hand signal developed by Dr. Dan Siegel.  We talk about how powerful the upstairs and downstairs brain is in influencing learning and our fight, flight, freeze or fawn reactions. The downstairs brain keeps us safe, so we can think of it as the “barking dog” that warns us when we feel...

Lauren interviews her money coach, Elizabeth Ralph. Through their work together, Lauren has changed her deep core beliefs about money and has made big changes in her life.  Elizabeth describes how her strong connection to animals (especially horses) caused her to redefine and create her own version of freedom. She explains how others can do the same: find your “why”, set goals to reach it, focus o...

In this three-part series, Lauren talks about parts of the brain that most relate to emotions and behavior:  Prefrontal Cortex – Thinking Brain or “Wise Owl” Limbic System – Emotional Brain or “Barking Dog” Brainstem – Reptilian Brain or “Fight or Flight” This episode is about the Brainstem , often referred to as the Reptilian Brain , the Primal Brain , or the Fight or Flight area. The Brainstem i...

Lauren has an in-depth conversation with Matthew Davidoff, High School ESL Teacher, University of Pennsylvania Adjunct Faculty, and Freelance Education Consultant. Their discussion includes why he entered teaching, the effect of sudden (and continued) remote learning, his experiences as a school board member, his research with the Red & Blue Exchange , along with thoughts on Cognitive Empathy....

In this three-part series, Lauren talks about the parts of the brain that most relate to emotions and behavior:  Prefrontal Cortex – Thinking Brain or “Wise Owl” Limbic System – Emotional Brain or “Barking Dog” Brainstem – Reptilian Brain or “Fight or Flight” This episode is about the Limbic System , often referred to as the Emotional Brain , Barking Dog , or Downstairs Brain . The Limbic System i...

In this three-part series, Lauren talks about parts of the brain that relate to emotions and behavior:  Prefrontal Cortex – Thinking Brain or “Wise Owl” Limbic System – Emotional Brain or “Barking Dog” Brainstem – Reptilian Brain or “Fight or Flight” This episode is about the Prefrontal Cortex , often called the Thinking Brain , Wise Owl , or Upstairs Brain . Logic, reason, thought, and communicat...

In this episode, Lauren discusses how knowing yourself is an important step in developing your self-care routine. She talks about how to identify your three main core values and then how to dig deeper to find your most authentic self .  Lauren recommends journaling for 7 days and provides each day’s topic to focus on and consider. Next, check your self-care activities in 6 key areas of wellness: m...