Pure Desire Podcast

Today Nick and Rodney discuss powerful insights on how to approach the conversation around sexuality in the church with love and grace. They emphasize the importance of sharing your personal journey without shame, offering support to church leaders, and fostering a more open and healing environment. Whether you're a church leader or a congregation member, this episode provides practical advice on...

God has the ability to redeem even the darkest times. Dr. Steffens takes a deep dive into the healing and recovery process following betrayal—focused mostly on the betrayed partner but also on how the betrayer can help the process. You will be encouraged and gain hope for the future! There is a proven path and essential tools for healing and growth, when we invite God to do what only He can do: RE...

Recovery doesn’t have to feel like solitary confinement. As with many areas of our lives, we need others to walk alongside us, to encourage and support us. And this is especially true when it comes to our recovery and healing journey.  Today we’re revisiting Nate Larkin’s session from the 2023 Pure Desire Summit to learn what it looks like to redefine recovery as a team sport. In community is wher...

The moment of discovery in a marriage or relationship is crushing. The exposure of sexual addiction or unfaithfulness wrecks the relationship. Is there any hope to rebuild? Should we even rebuild? On today's episode, we're joined by Traci Wright (Pure Desire Clinician). Traci knows firsthand the damage the discovery of sexual betrayal does. But she also knows the healing power of Jesus and walking...

Vicki and Johnny Greenfield are legends in the Pure Desire community! Today, we get to hear their story of healing. Starting with how sexuality was discussed in their homes, moving to sexual brokenness and how it entered their lives, and then moving to how God healed them and their marriage—their story is powerful! Not only will you be encouraged by their story of healing, but you will be inspired...

Today's episode addresses a listener's question—how to manage betrayal triggers. Most of us are aware of triggers for those struggling with addictive or compulsive sexual behavior. But are there such a thing as betrayal triggers? The answer is an emphatic YES! Ashley Jameson joins us to discuss what betrayal triggers are, how to identify them, how to bring healing to them, and what couples can do...

We have a very SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT on today's episode! Pure Desire is partnering with one of the most influential research firms in the world to bring forth new statistics on the impact of pornography in the church. We're joined by Heather Kolb and Ashley Jameson (hosts of our newest show,  Unfiltered ) to discuss the origins of this research project, our hopes for this new data, some of the init...

Significant relational injury occurs at the moment of discovery. One spouse finally feels free because the truth of their addiction or infidelity is out in the open. The other partner feels buried with trauma and has to reinterpret every aspect of their relationship history. On today’s episode, we are joined by Dr. Jake Porter (licensed therapist and founder, president, and CEO of Daring Ventures...

Many of us who grew up in the church experienced purity culture —a significant emphasis on sexual purity, especially with young people. While purity culture had good motivations, it has caused its fair share of damage—shame, guilt, and trauma. On today’s episode, we are joined by Katherine Gallagher, the Executive Director of GoStrategic, an author and speaker on the topic of sexual purity. Kather...

Summer months bring so much fun and excitement. But for those who are on the recovery journey, summer brings its own set of challenges. Warm weather means less clothing. This means more opportunities for temptations and triggers. On today’s episode, we talk about why summer can be so challenging, what we can do to be prepared for this season, and what it looks like to stay healthy! RESOURCES Full...

Addiction can be challenging to wrap our head around. What is addiction? How did this happen? Why me? Robert Vander Meer is on the podcast today to discuss the image and behavior of a cyclone and how this metaphor is helpful in understanding how and why addiction shows up in our life.  RESOURCES Full Episode Video (YouTube) Bob Newhart “Stop It” Video Cyclone of Addiction (from Pillar Six, Lesson...

Matt Dobschuetz, host of Porn Free Radio and founder of Recovered Man , is back on the show today!  Today, we talk about edging—non-relapse behaviors that follow our addictive patterns. We talk about what qualifies as edging, how to become more aware of any edging behaviors, the importance of check-ins with our community or group, and how to address these behaviors when we see them. RESOURCES Full...

Helping the next generation is not only about teaching what NOT TO DO. It also includes teaching them what TO DO.  On today’s episode, we’re joined by Barb Winters, founder of HopefulMom.net and author of Sexpectations .  Barb talks us through her experience in helping her children break free of pornography addiction and equipping them with the tools they need for healthy relationships. Barb speak...

It’s here—a NEW group resource for single women! What does it look like to live sexually healthy as a single woman? Today, authors Heather Kolb and Ashley Jameson join us to talk through our new resource for single women, Authentically You. They talk through who is the target audience, what makes Authentically You unique, the differences between this new resource and other resources we have for wo...

“Separation” is usually a swear word for church folk.  This is understandable when it’s done wrong. But separation can actually be a healthy tool used for the restoration of a marriage.  Today, we’re joined by a Pure Desire Clinician, Eileen Fagan, who defines a healthy or “therapeutic” separation and the benefits it can give a struggling couple. We talk through natural hesitations or fears with m...

When Christians are faced with the word “addiction,” there can be a significant reaction against something we don’t see clearly in Scripture. The word “addiction” doesn’t naturally seem to fit into our theological framework.  Today, we’re joined by author and speaker, Ben Bennett, to give us a new framework for reconciling addiction and theology. We explore how Scripture speaks directly to addicti...

The term “mental health” can be fuzzy. Are we talking about anxiety? Depression? Something more? All of the above?  Ben Bennett joins us today to talk about the connection between viewing pornography and mental health issues. Ben speaks of porn’s role in his personal battle with depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideations and how recovery impacts our mental health, our faith in Jesus, and our abil...

We all know communication is important. But what does healthy communication look like for a couple on the recovery and healing journey? Shari Chinchen, a Pure Desire Clinician, joins us today to discuss what makes communication healthy or unhealthy. We also discuss how to keep healthy communication a priority AND how to train our kids for healthy communication in their relationships. RESOURCES Ful...

Many men who’ve been through the Pure Desire recovery process have asked, “What’s after Seven Pillars of Freedom ?” Well, today’s episode is all about answering this question. Clinician and speaker, Robert Vander Meer, joins us to talk about our new resource, The Compassionate Warrior (to which Robert contributed). We talk through what this resource is, how it helps men see their life and recovery...

Today, we get to hear from Robert Nelson and Annie Burt (staff members at Faith Chapel in Billings, Montana). Robert and Annie talk us through their journey of implementing Pure Desire groups and resources at Faith Chapel. We talk through initial hurdles, challenges they’ve faced, the fruit they’re seeing from their efforts, and lots in between. RESOURCES Full Episode Video (YouTube) Betrayal & Be...

Today’s episode is one of our favorites! We have another Frequently Asked Questions episode where you, the listener, has sent in topical questions for us to discuss. We are joined by Traci Wright, one of our beloved clinicians, to talk about idolizing recovery, anniversaries of trauma, disclosure in dating and engagement, and more. RESOURCES Full Episode Video (YouTube) Pure Desire Online Groups C...

Though true healing and freedom from sexual addiction and brokenness is possible, it doesn’t mean the journey will be easy. The world we live in is still hyper-sexualized and full of things that can pull us away from health. On today’s episode, we talk about slippery slopes—areas or aspects of our lives that can be problematic in our sexual health. And there may be some that surprise you! We talk...

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is often associated with major trauma—wartime experiences, rape, and abuse. Studies increasingly show that PTSD is also experienced by betrayed partners. Rather than ignore or minimize it, let’s do something about it.  RESOURCES Full Episode Video (YouTube) Betrayal & Beyond Dr. Steffens Research Stress Index The Body Keeps The Score Pure Desire Groups GET STA...

For those who regularly listen to the show, we have a return guest. This guy has shared his story about the journey from porn star to a pastor. Today, we’re excited to have Joshua Broome back on the show to talk about his new book, 7 Lies That Will Ruin Your Life . We talk through all seven lies, identifying how they impact sexual brokenness and disrupt our healing. We also discuss some initial st...

We know sex trafficking exists in our world and is a growing problem. But it’s not something that’s talked about in many faith communities. On today’s episode, we’re going to talk about it! We’re thrilled to have Matt McCaulley and Kevin Whisman on the show: two guys who have spent the last few years writing, directing, and producing a full-length feature film called unDEFILED . We’ll talk about P...