Primary Attribute

The party descends down into the maintenance tunnels to follow Grickx's investigation into the death of his friend. They actually remember to prepare this time, in flagrant disregard for on-site procurement SOP. They even remember to tell people where they're going! They don't get any codec frequencies, though. Wealthy experiences a fear in her heart. Vons goes through a trial to survive. Aracyne...

Aracyne meets with Nara, and tries to plea her case. Nara isn't so easily moved, however, and will need some convincing. Meanwhile, the rest of the party has a perfectly pleasant time making new friends, training on their new gear, failing to understand business, and learning about the world around them. Wealthy takes a quick continuing education course. Aracyne has lewd thoughts. Vons is tempted...

The party has gathered together, and we join them as they discuss overthrowing the government. They, of course, have no reservations and are ready to engage in the most radical acts and do anything necessary to achieve their goals. Definitely. We also narrowly avoid at least one conversation about accounting. That's something, right? Totally anticapitalist move, right there. Grickx considers makin...

Our grand experiment in post-modern montage approaches its end. The party achieves some long-awaited goals and gains some new abilities. A sandwich atlatl is proposed. Most importantly, the Prophecy comes to pass. Grickx considers becoming a god. Wealthy bakes bread. Aracyne outlines the conditions under which she'd volunteer to be a practice target. Vons faces off against feathers. Shield is acco...

It's our 50th episode! Thanks for sticking with us, and we hope you keep on enjoying our show for a long time to come. :D We approach the end of our Bold Experiment in Montage That Transcends the Medium (BEMTTM). The party tries doing new things, like moving shop, engaging in this thing known as "work," and finding new books in the library. Only some of them turn out to be horribly regrettable! Gr...

Our prestige miniseries continues with the party pressing on in their training and putting down roots for further growth. There's study sessions, horrible grandparents, a friend waking up from a borderline coma, and the blowing up of spots! It's like Gilmore Girls by way of General Hospital! Aracyne finally makes it as an unpaid intern. Vons gets real about his estate. Grickx provides the finest k...

We wrap up week two of four of our montage! A speedy 3 episodes in! Aracyne syncs back up with the time stream, and everyone meets at a bar to catch up. And be mad at each other. Or just awkward. Friendships are complicated, okay? Aracyne violates the return policy. Grickx invests in R&D. Vons's past shows up on his doorstep. Wealthy hits the books. Check us out online! We're at https://primar...

(We recommend reading the title in Aracyne's voice for maximum effect.) In the second episode of the montage (shush, you), the remaining party of Grickx, Wealthy, and Vons searches for Aracyne, who's gone missing on them. Everyone brings their own approach to the task at hand. Some of them even work! Wealthy uses her hat-based powers to find the trail. Aracyne catches up on her correspondence. Gri...

We cut away from the party's montage to cover what Aracyne's been up to. Turns out it's not just partying! Instead there's disguises, stakeouts, copious amounts of poison, and an assassination mission. Which goes completely smoothly and definitely doesn't break Aracyne's worldview. Totally. Aracyne spills a drink and gets a new cloak. The GM is slow at math. Vons, Grickx, and Wealthy have a relaxi...

We start our highly efficient 4-week montage where the party members train up, make connections, and improve their skills as part of leveling. And cover one whole week. It's a slow-motion montage. Very high-concept, very avant garde. 100% intentional. >.>;;; Wealthy goes to office hours and meets a fellow researcher. Vons does the grossest thing yet. Aracyne slips away into her own episode (...

Everyone heads home, dirty and exhausted, after their rescue of Cog from the depths of the maintenance tunnels. The proper authorities are retroactively informed, loot is divided, some people pull off the transition back to daily life better than others, and we meet some delightful new characters on a date night. Vons is vulnerable to a vixen. Aracyne is totally, definitely, absolutely fine. Grick...

It's our 2021 Solstice Special! Or whatever winter-ish holiday of your choice! This solstice we would like to formally invite you to attend a party at the home of Grickx and Wealthy. There will be dinner, drinks, the airing of grievances, white oliphant games, and general merrymaking! All you have to do is bring yourself. The party, though? They have to bring their best sweaters with them, too. Vo...

(Special Announcement! Be sure to keep an eye out this Friday (12/24) for our holiday episode! There are SWEATERS.) With a pile of invisible monsters swarming towards them, and a new ally by their side, the party makes its escape from the underground facility. Will they make it out of the maintenance levels intact? More importantly, will they finally solve the riddle of the mystery square? Aracyne...

The party's secured Cog and starts looking for a way out. But that turns out to be a tall order, and as trouble besets them on every side things get buck wild. Aracyne wants up. Grickx proves himself to a certain someone. Wealthy hangs in there. Vons is surprised at the strength of his concoctions. Cog is still no help at all. Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/

With Cog's life hanging in the balance, the party executes their rescue operation. It leads to Cog's life hanging in midair instead. It's all going according to plan, right? And they tightened all those knots? Right? Guys? Grickx's plans go up in smoke. Wealthy tries to pull off a rope trick. Vons sticks the landing. Aracyne shows off her qualifications for Cirque du Soleil. Cog is no help at all....

After Aracyne's injury, the party stops to regroup, recuperate, and reconsider their plan of action. It looks like it's going to be a long night down in the maintenance tunnels. Wealthy lives up to one half of her name. Aracyne and Vons have a heart to heart. Grickx readies for launch. Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/

The party explores the room with the giant crystal column, searching for any more clues as to Cog's whereabouts. There's also the little matter of the disturbances in the water three stories down… Wealthy worries wildly. Vons engages in outright heroism. Aracyne takes a header. Grickx makes a wish. Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/

The party, having successfully saved Grickx from becoming Stabby-food, works out what to do next on their search for Cog. They press on through a dense thicket of horrible tongues to continue their quest further down into the darkness full of mystery squares, doors, and poor maintenance practices. Grickx takes matters into his own hands. Wealthy learns her new trade. Vons ponders potential fillets...

We rejoin our hero, Stabby the (not-technically-a-)Roper, as they try to finish the delicious meal they started last week. Will they succeed at consuming a delightful kobold treat? Perhaps sample a second course of foxfolk, halfing, or half-elf? Or will these annoying creatures interrupt their meal? Vons practices amateur surgery. Wealthy turns off her targeting computer. Aracyne shows off her kni...

The party's search for Cog continues as they try to find the best way down to the lower levels to keep following his trail. It's not all smooth sailing, however, like when they're interrupted by a mess of strange cables in a lower room… Wealthy is light on her feet. Vons considers the snack to danger ratio. Grickx suddenly ascends. Aracyne scouts ahead. Check us out online! We're at https://primar...

It's our Halloween special! We pause our party's dungeon delve adventure for a pleasant, quiet gathering of the party and friends at the Maefynwe estate to celebrate the Autumn harvest festival. Some claim the time of year is haunted, but that's all superstitious nonsense. Right? Grickx brings enough to share. Wealthy struggles with affairs of the heart. Vons gives professional criticism. Aracyne...

The party fully uncovers the breadth and depth of the mystery square as they investigate further the strange place they've found themselves in. They also talk to ghosts, but who cares about that when you're finishing a mini-map, am I right? Wealthy lights the way. Grickx lives vicariously through others. Vons tries to collect some samples. Aracyne descends to depths unknown. Check us out online! W...

As the party descends deeper into the mountain, they move away from the carefully constructed maintenance tunnels and into natural caverns riddled with OSHA violations. From holes to doors to poorly-described rooms, there's no end to the terrors they encounter! Aracyne copes with a tragedy. Vons takes a moment to think. Jaaspar uses his degree. Wealthy tries to hold the world to a higher standard....

The party gets ready to descend into the maintenance levels of the city to search for Cog. They get armored up, grab their gear, and head on through the bead curtain of destiny to find out what lies beyond. Aracyne helps a friend get dressed to go out. Vons finds out he'd hate the Haunted Mansion. Grickx remembers he was supposed to do something. Wealthy gets roped in. Check us out online! We're a...

The party is drawn together by Grickx's note and heads to Otten Core, where they hatch a plan to find the missing Cog. First, though, Aracyne has some business to conclude. Grickx hears a tale that chills him to the bone. Vons upcycles some utensils and makes a friend. Wealthy finds a table. Aracyne takes 2d6 feelings damage. Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/