Peace and Parenting: How to Parent without Punishments

Many of us have had experiences with bottling up emotions, and kids are no exceptions to this. Kids aren’t as capable of properly communicating their emotions so when there’s a backlog of feelings like frustration and sadness, this can make them act out so they can vent. This can be equally frustrating for parents too but it is possible to connect with your kids in a way they can easily understand...

Our kids have the right to say “no” and have choices. But it’s a delicate balancing act between that and making sure not to give in to everything they say either. Since kids also have underdeveloped brains, it can be difficult for them to properly communicate their negative emotions which can put them into conflict with their parents and other kids. This challenge is a natural frustration for pare...

Humans are built to work and depend on each other for survival and when you’re a parent, that desire to protect and help is increased tenfold. It’s a natural feeling to want to protect our kids from the harms and struggles of the world but it doesn’t mean we should micromanage them either. Sometimes the best course of action is to take a step back and watch. Our guest for this episode is Dr. Siggi...

Life’s full of challenges, and as parents, we want to send our children out into the world ready and self-assured so they can get through everything society throws at them. Self-esteem plays a huge role in that, and their time as kids and teens is a crucial time in building it.  For this solo episode, I’ll be talking about my personal struggles with self-esteem and how I turned them into lessons t...

For many parents, the first six to twelve months of their baby’s life are probably one of the most stressful thanks to sleep deprivation. The emotional and physical toll of listening to your baby cry isn’t easy, but it’s important to realize that it’s just as stressful for them as their body and brain try to adjust to life outside of the womb. For this week’s episode, I’ve invited Rachel, a pediat...

Change is a choice. Sometimes it may be a difficult one and requires a lot of effort. It’s also not something that can always happen in a snap, but rather takes the form of a continuous series of choices we consciously make. These choices become the path my guest takes to be better and do better as a parent. Joining me for this week’s episode is Rivkie, a mother of seven. It’s not easy to raise th...

When we believe our children are being difficult, we tend to use yelling to make them listen to us. But yelling can only go so far before it starts to form cracks in the relationship with our kids and leave them with emotional scars that might never go away. At some point, we need to ask ourselves: Is my child’s obedience worth losing their love and respect? In this solo episode, I share my experi...

Traditionally, children are meant to obey their parents without question and any sign of defiance is met with punishment. We believe that our child’s behavior is a reflection of us as parents and that opens us up to judgment from others. No one wants to be labeled as a “bad parent” but just because something is accepted as the norm doesn’t always mean it’s automatically right either. Chitra Peña,...

Parents try to prop themselves up as these invincible figures who aren’t affected by sadness or fear, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. They have their own fair share of anxieties and trauma; and when all of that just builds up, it starts to leak into other aspects of their lives. When that happens, it’s good to have someone who's willing to empathize and listen. For this episode, I...

Parenthood is a challenge enough in itself, but when you throw in becoming a stepparent; it can become a whole new ballpark. The desire to form a genuine bond with their stepchild while also trying not to overstep their boundaries is a balancing act that our guest is familiar with. Joining me for this episode is Nikki, a stepmom of 10 years, to share with us her experiences and how she managed to...

Parenting shouldn’t be synonymous with control, but for my guest, Iris Chen, this was her reality while growing up in an Asian-American household. Our childhood experiences can shape what kind of parents we’ll become to our kids; but as their parents, it is our role to guide and care for them while also respecting their own autonomy. This is the realization that Iris came to when she saw her tiger...

The initial transition to connective parenting isn’t exactly a straight line, and it can take years for us as parents to unlearn everything that was imposed on us when we were younger. But, it doesn’t mean it’s impossible. For this episode, I’ve invited long time member, Emilie, to share with us her success story with connective parenting. Being a mother of two, she knew she needed to do her homew...

There are going to be many times while raising our kids that they come to us with their problems, and we as parents might feel the need to immediately jump in as Mama Bear and tell them exactly what they need to do. But what if that isn’t what they really need? In this episode, I’m joined by Blimie from Unconditional Parenting to open up a conversation about why and how we can be reflective listen...

When dealing with sibling rivalry, it’s important we validate all sibling feelings. If we choose sides it can jeopardize our connection.  In this episode, I’ve invited April, a long-time listener to the podcast who has worked hard and long on her parenting. She’ll be walking us through the sharing issues between her two girls, while Michelle helps her unravel this common sibling struggle.  If you’...

So many parents and families struggle with pickiness in children’s eating habits. Our guest today, Gitte, has figured out what exactly might be the problem. With years in child psychology, she believes that the problem doesn’t lie in the food-- but rather their experience during mealtime. Gitte has developed a 4-week course called Real Food Hero, where she teaches us how to take back our mealtimes...

When kids are disrespectful, it can feel like a very personal attack leaving us wondering if our child will grow up to be an unkind and immoral adult disrespecting everyone they know.   In this episode, I’ll be walking you through all the ways we can alleviate their behaviour without correcting them immediately, allowing for self-reflection and time to be their teacher. By effectively teaching the...

Raising a kid is a journey. It's our job as parents to love and support our children through it, making sure we guide without controlling and establish a deep emotional trust and connection.   This week Sarah Ockwell-Smith joins us to discuss her book BETWEEN. and her own personal experiences with her 4 children. Be sure to listen in as she tells all we need to know about those “BETWEEN” years...

Today I’m joined by Amy! She’s a follower of mine, and part of our online community. In this episode, she’ll share with us her transition from conventional parenting, to connective parenting.  She’s also a graduate of the UBE Course! She’ll share with us her experience, and some advice she has for parents tuning in-- and why it’s so important to thrive with a community that shares the same ideals...

When we’ve exhausted all efforts like diaper changing, feeding, and checking out babies for harm-- sometimes it looks like they’re crying for absolutely no reason. So what else can we do to support our infants and babies while crying?  Today I’ve invited Patty Wipfler, founder of Hand in Hand Parenting where I was first inspired then trained to make the changes in how I parent my daughters.  In th...

What exactly is a natural consequence and why are they useful? Can we allow some things to unfold naturally without interfering in order to give our children space to learn on their own?  This week I walk you through some very familiar situations and explain the natural and not so natural ways in which we can handle them in order to give more onus to our children.    Episode Highlights:           ...

If you are an exhausted parent looking to find more cooperation and peace in your household while avoiding becoming tangled in the game of asking your kids the same thing over and over then you have come to the right place! To get started with cooperation-centered parenting, click here to check out my Guide to Cooperation; where you can learn to put your relationships with your kids first-- not co...

As parents we often spend much of our time intervening in sibling upsets. There’s nothing more upsetting than seeing one of your children be unkind to the other. But what can we do to help them foster their relationship without shame and blame? How can we ensure they are learning how to effectively communicate with one another if we don’t use punishments or threats? Today I’ve brought in Dr. Laura...

Beginning to speak to your children about all things adolescence  begins much younger than you might imagine. Many children enter puberty as early as 8. There doesn't necessarily need to be a formal "talk" but rather many conversations which build over time.  My guest for this episode is Dr. Dolly, a family medicine physician, who now helps parents and children broach all the uncomfort...

Aggression is the product of a child who isn’t doing so well. Be it from frustration they can’t communicate well, or other factors that we as parents cannot always understand. I always recommend daily time with our kids-- but for our guest Cara, daily time has turned into frustrating and oftentimes painful rough play. In this episode, I explain how else we can curb aggression by listening to feeli...

Often people ask me if Parenting without Punishments and using connection is for all children. In this episode, Bea Moise and I reassure you that parenting this way is effective for kids who are neurodiverse and children who are neurotypical.  Bea Moise is a parent of a neurodiverse son and parenting expert who brings her experience and insight to put things into perspective around all different t...