PD RAW

On today’s episode Nota and Few sum up a conversation initially taking place on the forum and now brought to life on the pod, thanks to the largesse of our newest and first patron, temporaryfeeling. The unpaid janitors analyze and reflect on the themes of children’s aggression, the relation between isolation, insecurity, and stunted development to grandiosity, superiority, and devaluin...

Ruthless talks to Nota about the difficulties of being the Golden Child, and what can happen when a parent undergoes extreme stress. The also discuss cultiural difference, and how the environment you live in can have a major impact on recovery.   

April’s producers have confirmed that she is still in the house after her last episode on misconceptions and so now, we’re going to turn to coping skills/mechanisms/strategies. We’re going to kick off the discussion with unhealthy/dysfunctional coping mechanisms, including a deep dive into April’s (emotional and functional) dependency on alcohol and the real gateway drug, c...

Warning: suicidal ideation, sexual abuse and drug use. Mold has travelled down a number of paths trying to find what works for them, and discovering more and more behind the locked doors of the mind.  

In this episode the Paris Hilton of NPD e-girls  u/aprilmelodyart  swings back on the pod for a light chat about misconceptions surrounding NPD. What’s the difference between grandiosity and confidence and which does a narcissistic person actually feel? Is the particular state of a narcissistic person fixed (overt, covert, vulnerable, etc)? How does the environment and their state...

(Same text as part 1): Alright, so, maybe this episode ain’t so anonymous, cause we have both hosts Nota and Few and super special, not so secret guest Madame Milkshake aka Sarah swinging by for the first group pod to talk about the light, easy to tackle topic of motherhood. In particular, we discuss being a mother while also being disordered and struggling with one’s own inner environ...

Alright, so, maybe this episode ain’t so anonymous, cause we have both hosts Nota and Few and super special, not so secret guest Madame Milkshake aka Sarah swinging by for the first group pod to talk about the light, easy to tackle topic of motherhood. In particular, we discuss being a mother while also being disordered and struggling with one’s own inner environment. How does one deal...

The common mispereception is that people with personality disorders are unaware of their dysfunction and unwilling to deal with it when it arises. This is, of course, not true. Some people are capable of great courage, and of facing hard truths in order to find answers. Guest Ruthless talks about deception – including self-deception – personas, fleeting feelings of connection, and gives his practi...

The outward behaviours that accompany narcissism are actaully a reaction to what is known as the Persecutory Inner Voice - a harsh, critical inner part that attacks the person and their efforts. Mud and Nota are joined by Az to talk about how they experience their inner voice.

Few and Madam Milkshake continue their conversation on a wide array of topics: varying types of relationships (home base, fillers, fantasies, self-esteem boosters); sadism and how it expresses itself in a relationship or to others; vulnerability and feeling weak when one attempts to put down their sadism for someone who doesn't reciprocate; shame-avoidance; and the grief that disordered people des...

Generally people are told not to go out and raw dog life, but that’s precisely what Cluster B Milkshake does with the dark side of the human psyche through her channel and contributions. Step into the maze of Milkshake’s mind and the monsters that reside there as we get to know her a little bit better and ask the really meaningful questions, like: Who in life really does have the spiritual, empath...

Highly Sensitive People are thought to comprise around 20% of the population, and are characterised as being more perceptive of, and aroused by, subtle stimuli. While this personality trait is thought to lead to insight, empathy and the tendency to thing things through very deeply, could it also lead to some negative traits as well? Nota is joined by Mud to talk through the connection between High...

Warning: this episode mentions substance abuse and cruelty. NPD is well-known for causing pain. Nota talks to Mud, who has helped Nota understand a lot about the more difficult aspects of Narcissism. Both Nota and Mud are fans of Psychodynamic Psychotherapy, and talk about their experiences with it. Resources And overview of the different types of Narcissistic Personality Disorder How "difficult"...

Might as well call us Alice, because Joella and Few go down a number of rabbit holes trying to understand the underlying behaviours and feelings around finances and how it affects one’s parenting. How can money be an expression of one’s underlying emotional environment? How does insecurity cause one to stay stuck in comforting yet self-defeating loops? What does it mean to have an inner locus of c...

Few and the Nameless Narcissist continue their lighthearted chat about the experience of being a Cluster B.

The Nameless Narcissist returns and the planned conversation quickly goes off the rails.

Few has a discussion with April, a trans woman looking to share her experiences and contribute to the destigmatisation of NPD. They discuss the importance of community and how it helps people with marginal identities, difficulties in personal relationships, and then some of the (parental) trauma involved in April's identities. https://www.youtube.com/@npdapril https://www.instagram.com/npdapril/

There are few topics as exposing and yet as formative to disorders as parenting. In this episode, Few and Joella begin a discussion of parenting involving disordered parents. What does a child wish for from a parent who identifies/is identifiable as such? How does a disordered person reconcile their own fears of vulnerability with a child who is nothing but vulnerability? In the next episode, Joel...

Katja Pavlovna is a British campaigner who works hard to promote the realistic understanding of personality disorders. She is the co-founder of the mental health initiative Sorry My Mental Illness Is Not Sexy Enough For You, appearing on the Lives Not Labels website. She is also a member of The Borderline Bunch, a podcast featuring people who have functionally recovered from BPD. Katja gives us an...

Few meets YouTube and TikTok star the Nameless Narcissist, who has been working away to provide insight into NPD. Nameless is a witty guy, and in one of our most humorous episodes, the pair have a laugh about the difficulties and awkward realities of being part of a disordered family. Warning: self-harm

What are some triggers for collapse? And what are some ways to get through it? Nota and Few continue their discussion about one of the most dangerous and challenging times for people with narcissism, anti-social or borderline defences.

People with personality disorders have built up psychological defences during childhood to protect themselves from pain. But these don't always work. What happens when something overwhelms the defences?

How does it feel to be given a diagnosis of a condition that is so heavily stigmatised? Is it possible to be open in public about having Narcissistic Personality Disorder?  Nota and Few talk about the withdrawal of a guest, and the difficulties faced by people with personality disorders in finding acceptance and ways to cope with their struggles.

How do we embrace the injured child within? In this episode, we meet Few, and learn about his history and journey. Warning: this episode discusses child sexual abuse.

What does narcissism feel like from the inside? What is it like to be given a diagnosis of a personality disorder? Host Nota shares her story.