Paging Mr Potter

Well it really didn't take long for all the goodwill and enthusiasm we built up after last week's 200th pod to completely evaporate in the face of some extremely annoying technical malfoynctions and our trademark lack of skill and content. But at least we still managed to swing by the Voldemart to pick up some essentials, stick it to Big Pharma in idiotic PMP style, and meet a game-changin...

200 PODS! That is a stupid amount of time dedicated to this stupid podcast... so this week we've decided to celebrate the only way we know how - by getting drunk and playing some RON OR OFF 💡🤪 We also wind back the clock and revive some of our most beloved/ regrettable seggies including: The word game with Riordan Hermione you reckon? We do Ron Ron Ron, and many more! And after 200 weeks and...

GET YOUR HOPES UP: With our 5 YEAR PODIVERSARY and 200th EPISODE right around the corner, expectations are at an all time high for a podcast spectacular that is totally planned in advance and thought out and not thrown together hastily at the 11th hour... can the PMP boys finally deliver? But before we get there, this week we talk proper strip club etiquette, rank the fruitiest fruits, and stumble...

We're finally back from our unexplained, months-long absence and it's back to basics this week, serving up what only the PMP boys can - the most unhinged, unspeakable defamation and horrific stories about scrotal injuries 🥰 We also discuss what the Nazis can teach us about looking youthful, what MMA legends can teach us about perfecting our tight five, and what Malaysian-Australian croone...

Ok now everyone take out your safety pencil and a circle of paper, this week I hope we can finish our work on the letter R. We also discuss Jason Mraz's emotional support hat, explain our secret 'DR ABC' method for podcast quality assurance, and cast a BAFTA award winning actor as a piece of withered old parsley in our latest Argus Film.

ITS COME TO THIS: just when we thought this pod couldn't sink any lower, by popular demand this week, we actually sit down and, god help us... rank every letter in the English alphabet from best to worst... We also talk about Lizzo's super chill mandatory work retreat and prove once and for all that we're way smarter than frogs

This week the we review the box office sensation that is BARBENHEIMER, as well as a lesser known Matthew McConaughey flick that perfectly complements cinema's hottest double feature. We also discuss copping some good pipe from Albert Einstein, living the so called 'crazy life', and an all time show nemesis's recent rebrand as a DJ

WAND-ERLUST 🪄🌍 We're back to a full complement of PMP boys this week as Nathan returns from Europe with plenty of helpful tips on galavanting, al dente cooking and Italian exclamations 🤌 We also discuss snappy middle eastern haircuts, review RFK Jr's unhinged press dinner, and devise a suitable punishment for an especially irksome British broadcaster.

DON'T LISTEN TO THIS IF YOUR NAME IS BRAD! Andrew and Riordan are back while Nathan shirks his duties galavanting around Europe. But don't worry, there's plenty of racism and stories about testicles being ripped off for you 😇

Only Drew and Riordan this week but have no fear... We brought a special guest: THE NEWS!! Sorry... Nathan usually writes these.

STATE OF OREGANO 🍕🏉🤌 If you're hungry for some rugby league news ahead of this week's blockbuster state of origin clash you're in luck, as we'll be serving up some piping hot NRL themed pizzas fresh from a highly questionable Sydney-based pizzeria. We also discuss messianic ska bands, bid vale to yet another filthy potterphile/pedophile, and consider a potential rebrand from the...

MAMBO AUSTRALIANO: Was the classic song 'Mambo Italiano' cooked up by a sterile American record company, and not made with love in a genuine Italian nonna's trattoria? PMP investigates... We also recount some disgusting pub stories more suitable for a mens room wall than a Harry Potter podcast, and unveil our policy for protecting Australia's biodiversity from invasive Norwegian dr...

KING SHIT: this week we dissect the obscene spectacle that was the coronation of his majesty King Charles III, including the questionable catering, motley cast of characters, and Meghan Markle's crude (but effective) disguise. We also discuss the joys of corporal punishment, theatrical older siblings, and OJ Simpson's infamous baseball career.

In an insane act of hubris, the NRL looks to capture the United States market (and guzzle down more of that sweet, sweet gambling money) by letting rugby league players run rampant in the City of Sin! Could this possibly be a good idea? Find out as we preview ✨MAGIC ROUND✨ this weekend. Also Riordan offers (threatens) too recite Miss Congeniality in its entirety, Draco is caught red-handed pervi...

We begin this week by discussing some uniquely Australian art forms including throat-step and BBQ hip-hop, before taking a trip south of the border for a Mexican lucha libre wrestling extravaganza! Then to round it all off we wade in to some truly grotesque topics - namely newborn babies and chimpanzee buttholes 🐒🍑

DALAI KARMA 😛 This week the spiritual leader of Tibetan Buddhism, his Holiness the Dalai Lama, receives some well-earned Victor Krumuppance. We also discuss the most and least sexy mens names, and delve into why dudes named Wayne are always above average at fingering. And finally we discuss getting revenge on would-be thieves using the old 'dipping cash in cyanide' trick.

Well golly make sure you don't miss this week's pod... we've got important POO UPDATES for you!! 💩💩💩 That's right, even after we spent all that time last week talking about poo, apparently that wasn't enough so we're back for round number 2 😜 this week with some important POO UPDATES 💩💩💩 provided by the ever-reliable potterphiles, one of which might even save the lif...

This week we urge you to abandon your friends, family, society etc and instead join up with a ragtag community of online weirdos in the pornhub comments section 🥰 🥰 We also interrogate the claim that blood is thicker than water 👩‍🔬 and reveal the little known legal loophole guaranteed to absolve you of any and all criminal charges! Plus we debut the brand-spanking new game (concocted by anothe...

NAZI SANDWICH: Unfortunately this week's pod is book ended by some inevitable Nazi chat, since apparently there's heaps of them running around in Melbourne... but even if that's not to your taste, don't miss out on the sweet, sweet filling in this Nazi sub - as we also talk about Jesus's supple body, festive intergenerational warfare, and the surprising new star of the upcoming...

It's an extra long pod this week to compensate for our increasingly loose schedule... but its fair to say a lot has happened in those few additional days since our last podcast including COOL STUFF 😎 like getting catatonically drunk at a Harry Styles concert, AWKWARD STUFF 🐢 like probably dying in a pointless war with China soon, and CRAZY STUFF 🤪 like the insane Airtasker blood feud that one R...

BRAWN > BRAINS: this week we check in on a couple of godlike adonises, Dave Bautista and Arnold Schwarzenegger, to see what these big old slabs of prime beef can tell us about thespianism, aesthetics, and weird sex stuff 💪 We also have plenty of helpful tips for protesting cops at World Pride (in style) and boldly ask as the question - is moving apartments more painful than childbirth? 

We can't even begin to describe the magnitude of the major malfoynction that all but destroyed this pod, or the heroic/ psychotic lengths we went to salvage it, but as you listen to this episode just keep in mind how close you came to never knowing about: when to buycott and when to boycott  schlemiels and schlemazels from our high school the de-platforming of AI Seinfeld Going Going Gondola...

SEE YOU IN PELL 🔥🔥 Well its been a long time between pods, but just as our motivation was hitting an all time low Sweet Lady Luck threw us a bone - Cardinal George Pell bit the dust and we knew it was only a matter of time before we'd be back, if only to stomp on his grave for a bit and bid a belated adios to an OG potterphile and all round despicable man. Plus we catch up on some baffling news...

Rest assured dear potterphiles, the paging mr potter podcast will be returning very, very soon! In the meantime, please enjoy this compilation of one of our favourite segments from last year - our mental list of the craziest moments in history. And for the ultimate listening experience (with timestamps and cheesy visuals) head over to the PMP Youtube channel and subscribe. 

HARK THE HARRY 👼👼📯📯 It's time for yet another PMP Christmas Spectacular 🎄🎄🎄 This week we celebrate JC's bday by singing some vile Christmas carol parodies, and shout out the real xmas MVP Ebenezer Scrooge 👑 And while the countdown to 2023 is on, we'll run you through:  17 days of PMP Christmas 16+ straight days of PMP content consumed by one potterphile this year  5 stages of gri...