Nuzzle House

We've decided to call this: 'The Afternoon of the Cursing at the Grocery Store of the Cat People' We read the story about a man who LOVES Garfield. Listen Anywhere: https://gestating-the-curious-mind.pinecast.co Paranormal smut novels for the discerning reader. Support Nuzzle House by contributing to their tip jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/nuzzle-house Send us your feedback online: https://pi...

We learn: My science fiction was horse shit I’m not smart enough to understand this story I pee a lot and it’s FINE Go on, read it for yourself:  https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/74205 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contributing to their tip jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/nuzzle-house Send us your feedback online: https://p...

We learn: Drac and I are roughly the same age If you’re on a revenge spree- feel free to skip over people who aren’t as important Don’t be an elitist- flash fiction is FINE Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/books/31-horrifying-tales-from-the-dead/9781540800541 Visit  https://www.nuzzlehouse.com  for show info. Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. About Drac! Drac Von Stolle...

We learn: Anderson wasn’t a pervert- he was FINE Children's stories have kids suffering to the point of absurdity The pig was from hell Go on, read it for yourself:  https://bookshop.org/p/books/the-fairy-tales-of-hans-christian-andersen-hans-christian-andersen/7147043?ean=9781515401339 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contributi...

We learn: I’ll never see Nates (from words about books) beautiful face Cowboys are also called “Cow-punchers” for some reason Cowboy sleuths always know who did the crime, they just let the guilty simmer in their guilt. Go on, read it for yourself:  https://bookshop.org/p/books/pioneer-cattlemen-in-montana-the-story-of-the-circle-c-ranch-walt-coburn/11193951?ean=9780806142081 Listen anywhere: nuzz...

We learn: Sometimes, Whiteclaws are disgusting Things can work out for the best- if you’re a doll Apparently theater kids are the most dangerous kids on earth Go on, read it for yourself:  ** https://www.amazon.com/Little-Wooden-Margery-Williams-Bianco-ebook/dp/B0D13P7DZ1** Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contributing to their t...

We learn: You can catch a robot with good ‘ol fashioned sleuthing Saying “I don’t care how late it is” is an American tradition Yes, I take breaks from reading to watch TikTok Go on, read it for yourself:  https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/68377 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contributing to their tip jar: https://tips.pinecast....

We brainstormed a story about a man who LOVES Garfield. Listen Anywhere: https://nuzzlehouse.com Paranormal smut writing for the discerning reader. Support Nuzzle House by contributing to their tip jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/nuzzle-house Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/nuzzle-house/b50dcd7b-fe48-4458-a6da-6b893c4f1f87

We learn: Pirates will always be fun-loving little scamps There’s a Long Johns Silver’s open by me that I will go to now In this story Tom Hanks will always be miserable? Go on, read it for yourself:  https://bookshop.org/p/books/treasure-island-unabridged-and-fully-illustrated-robert-louis-stevenson/14650478?ean=9781789431032 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read aloud for grow...

We learn: Long John Silver is a smooth talking jerk I’m SUPPOSED to be on a PLANE I didn’t know you could use a corpse as a compass Go on, read it for yourself:  https://bookshop.org/p/books/treasure-island-unabridged-and-fully-illustrated-robert-louis-stevenson/14650478?ean=9781789431032 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contribu...

We learn: Little boys can become big boys thanks to pirates I JUST want to swim in my white-trash pool Long John Silver is back at it Go on, read it for yourself:  https://bookshop.org/p/books/treasure-island-unabridged-and-fully-illustrated-robert-louis-stevenson/14650478?ean=9781789431032 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contri...

We learn: When you’ve been cleaning up blood all day, you want something different I’m going to get you go like my basement someday I don’t know if cutting the ship free is the smartest idea ever Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/treasure-island-unabridged-and-fully-illustrated-robert-louis-stevenson/14650478?ean=9781789431032 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime s...

We learn: Action scenes back then were really weird I have no idea what holiday I’m celebrating tomorrow If your friend dies, just roll his body over to the corner of the room. it’s FINE. Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/treasure-island-unabridged-and-fully-illustrated-robert-louis-stevenson/14650478?ean=9781789431032 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story rea...

We learn: It’s storming out and I’m recording with the windows open, I don’t care if it sounds bad Our hero doesn’t tolerate the homeless Silver is the master of the ‘dangerous crutch’ technique Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/treasure-island-unabridged-and-fully-illustrated-robert-louis-stevenson/14650478?ean=9781789431032 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime st...

We learn: I had to drive my kid back from college- that’s why I’m late Our hero isn’t going to be much of a pirate if he keeps snitching it’s totally normal to sit inside apple barrels while you eat an apple Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/treasure-island-unabridged-and-fully-illustrated-robert-louis-stevenson/14650478?ean=9781789431032 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Yo...

We learn: I have to go to a high school play, of all goddamn things Our hero gets his act together Rich people LOVE adventure Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/treasure-island-unabridged-and-fully-illustrated-robert-louis-stevenson/14650478?ean=9781789431032 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contributing to...

We learn: Your dad can die but man, pirates are so exciting that it almost doesn’t matter! I got a cat with a ‘bad back’ Who would have thought that a doctor can master pirates to well Go on, read it for yourself:  https://bookshop.org/p/books/treasure-island-unabridged-and-fully-illustrated-robert-louis-stevenson/14650478?ean=9781789431032 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read...

We learn: World War 3 again? What a relief that the rabbit doesn’t get burned alive This book is about my stuffed Grover- and I’m still waiting for him to be real Go on, read it for yourself:  https://bookshop.org/p/books/the-velveteen-rabbit-margery-williams/48974?ean=9781398809314 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contributing t...

We learn: Sleep is for idiots I got a neighbor who is probably a Q-anon idiot I’m speed reading to try to get done before my idiot dog has to take a crap Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/asleep-in-armageddon-ray-d-bradbury/18347855?ean=9789355891983 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contributing to their t...

We learn: Heathcliff FINALLY DIES After a whole winter in Minnesota without snow - we have a huge storm coming. Ugh. Was there really a time where wealthy shut-ins just wasted away and eventually married a cousin? Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/wuthering-heights-emily-bronte/17467979?ean=9781912714070 Read an article about it: https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/7/30/176299...

We learn: Linton has actually managed to be more of a snot than usual My recording room is really echoey Lockwood is an incel Go on, read it for yourself:  https://bookshop.org/p/books/wuthering-heights-emily-bronte/17467979?ean=9781912714070 Listen anywhere: nuzzlehouse.com Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contributing to their tip jar: https://tips.pinecast.co...

We learn: Linton actually, somehow, seems to get MORE annoying My wife is sick and my house is burning hot How awkward is it to abduct someone and planning on keeping them for weeks when they’re ready to give you what you want in the first 5 minutes Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/wuthering-heights-emily-bronte/17467979?ean=9781912714070 Listen anywhere: https://linktr.ee...

We learn: Cathy is just as much of an entitled turd as her mom There was an actual bird in my basement Linton is at Malfoy levels of getting on my nerves. Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/wuthering-heights-emily-bronte/17467979?ean=9781912714070 Listen anywhere: https://linktr.ee/nuzzlehouse Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contributing...

We learn: People just die, and not a lot of buildup happens for it. Getting through 4 chapters is draining Now the book is all about kids, like a Nickelodeon show Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/wuthering-heights-emily-bronte/17467979?ean=9781912714070 Listen anywhere: https://linktr.ee/nuzzlehouse Your bedtime story read aloud for grown ups. Support Nuzzle House by contr...

We learn: Heathcliff is a self absorbed jerk. The kind of guy who paces around his basement listening to Attack Attack I’m putting dirty water into my CPAP now Catherine gets REALLY manipulative on her death bed Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/wuthering-heights-emily-bronte/17467979?ean=9781912714070 Listen anywhere: https://linktr.ee/nuzzlehouse Your bedtime story read a...