My Messy Little Life Podcast

In this episode I talk about how I thought I was all woke and evolved until my son wanted to buy pink fairy wings for Halloween, how when I was 35 I had a complex about my age and how I’ve learned that I’m much better if I let something roll around in my brain before I react. You can visit my website at coachingwithsuzanne.me to read my blog, learn more about how I help people as a life coach and...

In this episode I talk about how sneaking around and telling half truths at Christmas makes me feel like a big fat liar, how maybe our kids need something to believe in and how explaining things like God, politics and suicide to your child can be impossible. You can follow My Messy Little Life on Facebook and Instagram. You can visit my website coachingwithsuzanne.me to read my blog, learn more ab...

In this episode I talk about how I felt even more anxious when I sent my son off to camp than I did last year, how camp happens to fall in the anniversary of my husband’s passing and how I’m a light sleeper so every sound and every movement wakes me up. You can follow My Messy Little Life on Facebook and Instagram. You can visit my website coachingwithsuzanne.me to read my blog, learn about how I...

In this episode I talk about how Thanksgiving used to be my very favorite holiday, how when I tell people that I have anxiety they ask why and that’s not how anxiety works and how after my husband died I had my son open the can of biscuits because it scares the shit out of me. You can follow My Messy Little Life on Facebook and Instagram. You can visit my website coachingwithsuzanne.me to read my...

In this episode I talk about how I worked with a TMJ specialist for my frequent migraines, how I realized how the old me would have reacted in a situation versus how the new me reacted and how I tell my clients that just because words are coming out of someone’s mouth or thoughts are showing up in your brain doesn’t mean you have to believe them. You can follow My Messy Little Life Podcast so you...

In this episode I talk about how my best friend came for a visit in July, how even though I have processed the anger and grief around my husband's death I haven't even begun to process the sadness and how Sad September started early when Lahaina burned down to the ground. You can follow My Messy Little Life on Facebook and Instagram. You can visit my website at coachingwithsuzanne.me to ge...

In this episode I talk about how sad and helpless I felt during the Maui fires, how I wish my late husband were still here to comfort me and how my memories of Maui live in my heart and cannot be burned down. You can follow My Messy Little Life on Facebook and Instagram. You can visit my website coachingwithsuzanne.me to learn more about what I do as a Certified Life Coach and how you can work wit...

In this episode I talk about how I thought if I stopped identifying as a widow it would somehow make it no longer true, how I realized I better have something of my own now that my son is getting older and how I became a certified life coach. As a thank you for listening you can use the code MAHALO at coachingwithsuzanne.me to schedule a free 45 minute coaching session with me with no catch.

In this episode I talk about how saying all the intimate details about my life out loud and being honest can be a lot, how I don’t have to wait until I’m falling apart to take care of my mental health and how I’ll be taking a mental health break to take care of myself. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how in less than two weeks I’ll be turning fifty, how before I lost my husband to suicide I experienced several forms of childhood trauma and how it hasn’t been easy to be my friend because for so long I wasn’t capable of reciprocating anything. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how when my son was little he used to come into our bed in the middle of the night, how after my husband died I asked our son if there was anything of his daddy’s he wanted to keep and he said “his side of the bed” and how I know logically that getting rid of the bed doesn’t mean I don’t love him anymore. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how I’m super nosey, how because of migraines and depression I spend a lot of time at home and how I’m at a point where I can’t bounce back the way I used to. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how I surprised my husband by dancing hula for him at our wedding, how a grief grenade is a reminder that your person is gone and how telling myself I shouldn’t feel this way just adds to the pain. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how on the last day of summer break I woke up with a migraine, how I used to panic regularly after my husband died and how I had finally gotten to a point where I could see anxiety as a feeling and not some scary monster outside of me. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how I adopted my cats, how my husband always said having pets is good for kids because it teaches them about death and how I’ve wondered if there is more peace and closure in knowing someone you love is going to die. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how my son started middle school this week, how I’m trying to navigate life with migraines and how I enrolled in a certification program to become a life coach. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how the outpour of love and generosity I received after my husband died was humbling, how asking for help mostly feels like defeat and how I hired a housekeeper and am working on not making it mean that I’m a failure. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how I’m guilty of grabbing my phone and scrolling through for a solid hour before getting out of bed, how my son fainted and I think it was a panic attack and how I don’t think people realize when they ask me how my husband died they are asking me to relive the worst day of my life. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com

In this episode I talk about how I used to lie in bed at night planning the following day down to the minute, how when I have a migraine I feel beat down and helpless and how our summer break schedule is almost exactly the same as our schedule during the school year. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how nothing about anxiety makes logical sense, how I can do bugs but I can’t do medical stuff and how it’s easy to blame my late husband for everything that goes wrong. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how I am so tired of being treated like I don’t matter, how I learned that if I’m feeling angry or frustrated or outraged something is wrong but not with me and how I am human and humans make mistakes. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how I leave so many conversations feeling embarrassed, how my therapist told me that oversharing is a trauma response and how when your husband dies you lose so many people. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com. @my_messy_little_life

In this episode I talk about how resistance is my go to response in most situations, how I’ve noticed my son’s anxiety showing up more and how it’s easy to be a parent but to be a good parent is so hard. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com and on Instagram @my_messy_little_life

In this episode I talk about how I grew up in a culture obsessed with looks, how I watched all the girls in school hate their bodies and how for the first time in my life I felt fat. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how there was a period of time when I was not okay, how we started to baby step our way into what we now refer to as Saturday Adventures and how doing an aerial obstacle course reminded me exactly of this grief journey that I’ve been on for so long now. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.