Movie Mastery

From a hotel room in Wisconsin, we drag James into our muck and watch a Tom Arnold film that is extremely Tom Arnold Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Buffy, BSG, and Lost collide in a bar with a Baldwin and what happens is, you know, fine. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's taken a while but we finally have gotten to the movie that every bad movie podcast has to talk about eventually. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Another Astrologer? That's right, it's the other movie from 1975 with this name and probably the one we were supposed to watch initially. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We might have ended up watching the wrong The Astrologer from 1975 since there are two bad movies of that name from that year. This one is 90% dialogue! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Wolverine fights the Duke from Moulin Rouge in a movie that sucks so bad and yet is a spectacle of absolute joy to watch. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The maker of He-Man and Fat Albert decided to make an adult cartoon movie about fighting the personification of internet porn addiction as a pitch for a show that I can't imagine being sold to literally any television company. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Having never seen a full episode of the show, this movie is possibly the worst way to be introduced to the property. It's just rich white people complaining and being awful but not in a fun way like Arrested Development. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

From the guy that brought us Baby Ghost, comes a movie that is just about the same level of quality but way more nudity, knives, and n-roller skates. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A bog standard barbarian plot that gets just enough spice from the animal telepathy stuff to be kind of worth watching Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We return to the theaters to complete our grim duty of bearing witness to the slow and tragic mutilation of everything Spider-Man related that Sony shoves into the grinder. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A listener's recently deceased dad worked on this movie but don't worry, they just did director of photography so they aren't fully to blame for this turd of a 60's nostalgia movie. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sci-Fi Channel trying to cash in on Reign of Fire of all things spent a million dollars on this with almost all of that going to the cost of dragon effects and pyrotechnics and none of it to lighting or sound equipment. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This 70's movie that took so long to edit that it came out in the 80's has no redeeming factors. A comedy without humor. An exploitation film without anything risqué. Grainy sound and fuzzy images that serve no purpose. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Special guest Taylor Moore joins us to discuss an animated film that truly nobody asked for and that wastes an all star voice cast on the most direct-to-video sequel you could imagine. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is a movie that almost certainly stemmed from finding a weird rabbit marionette and then "writing" a "script" to use it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A horror comedy that forgets it's supposed to be comedic until about the last 10 minutes of the movie. At least the sloth puppet is kinda fun. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A kid buys a magic dirt bike that helps him save the local hot dog restaurant by doing things that have nothing to do with riding a dirt bike. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I know I had seen this movie before but couldn't remember much and now having reviewed it for the show I know why. There is nothing to remember about this very boring movie about a a man that proves you're never to old to murder a bunch of people. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A vampire movie that is continually setting up interesting ideas and refusing to do anything with them because it needs that run time for sex jokes and weed references. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A movie that tries to be about two bumbling idiot heroes in the vein of Bill & Ted or Dude Where's My Car but has none of the charm, earnestness, or humor that make those work. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is the type of kid's movie that isn't just bad because it's low quality schlock but also because all the advice it's supposed to be giving to kids is actively detrimental. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A movie that seems by all measures to be one thing ends up being something else entirely. While not exactly a masterpiece because some glaring issues, this might be one of the few 70's movies we've watched we didn't hate. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Based on the Disney ride of the same name, this made for TV movie is desperately trying to not be scary. Or interesting. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

An otherwise decent heist movie that gets dragged down by some bad choices on CGI and presentation that could have easily been reworked. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices