Mask Off for Masc with Vance

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Vance chats with Enzo for a raw conversation about addiction, sobriety, sex work, self-worth, and the chaos of trying to rebuild your life while still being fully inside of it. Together, they talk about the highs and crashes of addiction, the ways intimacy and validation can become tangled together, and what it means to search for connection without pretending to...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Vance chats with Brian G. Murphy, author of Love Beyond Monogamy , for a conversation about ritual, community, and the ways we create meaning in our lives. Together, they explore how experiences like yoga, music, and gathering with friends can become modern spiritual practices — the places where we process loss, celebrate connection, and remember who we are. Brian...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Vance chats with Tom, a sex and relationship therapist, for an honest conversation about what it feels like to be gay men navigating modern intimacy. Together, they unpack loneliness, emotional safety, and the tension between freedom and connection, while diving into monogamy in the gay community — where it often feels split between monogamous and non-monogamous r...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Vance chats with Gary Albert — therapist, embodiment facilitator, and former classical musician — to explore the winding path that led him into supporting gay men in their relationships with pleasure, intimacy, and sexuality. We get into all of it: vulnerability, compulsive sexual patterns, limerence, emotional attachment, and why feeling our harder emotions is ac...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Vance chats with Dr. Dallas Bragg, a recovery coach who supports queer men navigating chemsex and addiction. Dallas opens up about his own journey from addiction to recovery, the challenges of relationships in the midst of it, and the power of finding real support. We get into the emotional layers of addiction, identity, and rebuilding after rock bottom, as well a...

Send us Fan Mail Vance and Daniel dive into the complexities of the adult industry—exploring perceptions, personal journeys, and the importance of intimacy and connection in porn. They unpack the realities of production, the impact of societal norms on identity, and how communication shapes relationships. The conversation also explores sexual identity, queer community dynamics, and navigating judg...

Send us Fan Mail Vance sits down with David Jacques, aka Davey Wavey, for a no-holds-barred conversation about dating, hookups, and desire. They swap some of their best (and worst) dating stories and talk about how finding love and casual connections in the digital age can feel like its own skillset — one that teaches us what really turns us on. They dive into age gaps between gay men, the dynamic...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Coach Kevin Martin and Vance dive into personal growth, the intersection of therapy and content creation, and the journey of embracing sexuality. We talk about the challenges of staying authentic online, the importance of mindfulness, and the power of sexual empowerment. Our conversation also touches on handling criticism, navigating loneliness, and learning to be...

Send us Fan Mail In this engaging conversation, Tim Lagman, a certified sex educator and podcaster, shares insights on sex education, body image, and the complexities of relationships within the LGBTQ+ community. The discussion covers personal experiences, the importance of open communication in relationships, and the societal pressures surrounding physical appearance. Tim emphasizes the need for...

Send us Fan Mail In this conversation, Vance and Nathan Serrato discuss the intricacies of queer love coaching, the impact of gay masculinity on relationships, and the importance of vulnerability and emotional intelligence. They explore childhood experiences that shape perceptions of masculinity, the dynamics of friendships within the gay community, and the need to address issues like sexual assau...

Send us Fan Mail To close out the summer, I wanted to bring you something lighter—especially after the last episode on grief. I’ve always been a romantic at heart. I want to fall madly in love, but as I grow older and wiser, I’ve learned not to lose myself in it. I see romance as a kink—something I can tap into when I want to feel a certain way in my relationships. It can be an exaggerated fantasy...

Send us Fan Mail This bonus episode is a vulnerable one. I wanted to talk about grief—how it’s shaped me, how it lingers, and how I still struggle to face it. I’ve also realized how much I struggle with intimacy, especially when it comes to letting people see that pain. Lorde’s new album hit something in me. It’s messy, honest, and full of feeling—just like grief is. It made me want to stop hiding...

Send us Fan Mail It’s the Madonna episode! Anyone who knows me knows how deep my obsession with Madonna runs. But it’s not a superficial fascination—it’s rooted in what she’s represented for me and so many others. In this episode, I’m joined by my guest Stefan, host of the wildly popular MLVC Podcast , as we dive into all things Madge and reflect on how integral she’s been to our lives growing up...

Send us Fan Mail In this week’s episode, I chat with Tantra facilitator and sexological bodyworker Jason King. We explore the question: What is intimacy? —especially in the context of sexual connection. Our conversation dives into vulnerability, and how intimacy often requires us to take emotional risks, even when there’s a chance of rejection. Jason shares how many men default to a hyper-masculin...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, I chat with Firefly Tantra, who works with men using the practice of Tantra. He breaks down what sessions with clients actually look like, how Tantra compares to somatic sex coaching, and where the two overlap. We talk about dealing with shame when it shows up during sex—something we’ve both seen in our own lives and in our work. We also get into body image and ho...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, I have the pleasure of chatting with the funny and delightful Matthew Shur. We talk about our experiences working with Himeros and how each of us found our way into the world of porn. We also explore how performance can enhance sex—especially when we're truly connected to our bodies. The conversation touches on burlesque as a celebration of self-love, and how...

Send us Fan Mail I had a truly meaningful conversation with my friend Rahim Thawer that I’m excited to share. We explored a wide range of topics, all rooted in the theme of empathy. How do we connect with people we disagree with? What does activism look like in the digital age? And how do we navigate the everyday trauma of simply being human in today’s world? On a lighter note, we also talked abou...

Send us Fan Mail My friend Priscilla Mossy Stone joins me to chat about their story of coming out, going to conversion therapy, and finding their way to drag. We discuss how social norms of masculinity and femininity can keep men in a small box of rules to live by. Both of us found that by expressing all parts of ourselves, and finding some inspiration from pop divas, can give us a greater sense o...

Send us Fan Mail I met my friend Jean-Francois a few years ago when we were both fairly new yoga teachers. We reconnected after our yoga paths both crossed into the world of eroticism. We chat about how those tools that we found in a spiritual and physical practice can translate into sex and connection. In this episode we also dive into the topic of body image and how we both struggle at times wit...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode I am joined by my friend Don Shine, who is a coach/body worker and retreat facilitator for the Body Electric school. At the time of recording this episode it was the week of the American inauguration for Donald Trump. We discuss how to deal with the uncertainty and real fear our communities are facing in these times. We talk about our experiences growing up in rura...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode I am joined by my friend Michael DeCorte. We both share our experiences of struggling with addiction and how it’s changed over the years. Michael had recently turned 50 when we recorded this episode and we chat about how it feels to get older in the gay community. We reflect back on heavy partying days and how that still shaped us to be who we are now. Our love of...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode I am joined by my friend and collaborator, Karim. We discuss how certain social settings are not for us, and how we tend to like deeper and more meaningful conversations. This leads us to how we enjoy getting to know people on this level through our work, social media, and being outspoken. I enjoyed recording this so much and it was one of the reasons I wanted to s...

Send us Fan Mail Hi there! I'm Vance Hedman and I am a somatic intimacy coach based out of Toronto, Canada. I wanted to start this podcast to have deeper conversations with the other queer people in my life. I can't wait for everyone to hear the first episode out in March! Subscribe for new episodes! Follow the podcast on Instagram @maskoffformasc