Make Your Damn Bed

The focus is on repair. There is a necessity of missing out that allows us The focus is on self care. Self preservation. It's also a way to improve and deepen listening. Productivity isn't just producing something new. It's maintenance + sustenance work. It's care work with no "tangible" numbers to track or changes to measure. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here . Buy Jenny Odell's book here . Listen to...

The labor movement fought and died for our right to time off to just exist. To do what we will. The gig economy is taking that back with the illusion of "freedom" and I have fallen for it. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here . Buy Jenny Odell's book here . Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book . Read Julie's Medium Blog . Support JULIE (and the show!) Support + get some bonus stu...

Build an attention holding architecture: where it's safe to simply exist. where you can learn to attune to what matters. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here . Buy Jenny Odell's book here . Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book . Read Julie's Medium Blog . Support JULIE (and the show!) Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON . Get an occasional personal email from me: www.m...

We've been taught to view "productivity" and "worth" and "value" through a capitalistic lens. What if we change our interpretations of these things? What if we start to include "presence" and "experience" as worthwhile ways to be productive and add value to our lives? Get Jenny Odell's Books Here . Buy Jenny Odell's book here . Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book . Read...

The world is so make it about interaction, instead. The attention economy has spent billions making their product irresistible while convincing us it's our idea to be there. Resist your fear of being perceived. Jump timelines and do something different. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here . Buy Jenny Odell's book here . Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book . Read Julie's Medium...

When I act in alignment with my core values I feel more confident but what if the decisions I’m stuck with leave me with no choice but to make choices that don’t align and dont fit my desired values for the future?  The beauty of judging the choices I had rather than the decision I made, is that it opens me up to the nuanced reality.  It’s not about perfect alignment because that’s not p...

CORE INSIGHTS FROM THE BOOK, " FOUR THOUSAND WEEKS ": Embrace finitude : Your life is absurdly short (around 4,000 weeks). Stop trying to “master” time; instead, accept your fundamental limitations. Productivity is a trap : Becoming more efficient only creates more demands, leading to perpetual busyness, not freedom. Choice means sacrifice : Every decision to do one thing means sacrificing countle...

We can control our vessel, not the ocean.  Life’s default state is a little scary. A little insecure. A little worried. A little vulnerable to the elements.  The good news is, those scary vulnerable unavoidable feelings don’t have to be all encompassing and can be made less powerful through direct recognition and balance.  The future is still in progress, so I can and should be doin...

I'm slowly realizing that the key wasn't to get "more free time for myself", the key is to get "more free time together". The highlight should be: Communal rhythm. Coordinated leisure. Planned connection. Shared ritual. Access the book, Four Thousand Weeks: https://www.oliverburkeman.com/fourthousandweeks The synopsis of the book, here . Read Julie's Medium Blog . Support JULIE (and the show!) Sup...

Build your tolerance for "chill" and "ease" by scheduling it. Prioritize doing nothing productive. Seek out ways to create that don't have a "payoff" and make it anyway. My addiction to "motion" to "movement" to constant "stimulation" is normal, daily tasks feel like a physically painful burden. Consider discipline as a form of devotion, not a form of punishment. Access the book, Four Thousand Wee...

When work became “the real point of existence,” leisure's purpose became for “recovery and replenishment.” This meant the  whole of life was valued for something else, in the future, not for itself .  Accept that everything is random and impossible to predict. The only part of time that is "our business" is the present moment. Access the book, Four Thousand Weeks: https://www.oliverburke...

The human experience is finite, but that is terrifying. So we distract ourselves. We convince ourselves that if we just "do everything perfectly all the time" we can avoid the painful reality of life's limitations. But refusing to make a choice is a choice. Not committing is a commitment. Not settling is settling. There's some shit you'll never get to. There's some shit you'll never do perfectly....

“A world which increasingly consists of destinations without journeys between them, a world which values only ‘getting somewhere’ as fast as possible, becomes a world without substance. “ - Alan Watts When convenience drains an activity of its meaning, it becomes less valuable. - Oliver Burkeman Access the book, Four Thousand Weeks: https://www.oliverburkeman.com/fourthousandweeks The synopsi...

“Modern industries thrive on offering  convenience , eliminating “pain points” or “friction” from daily life. Uber, Apple Pay, and food delivery services smooth out mundane chores. However, this smoothness is a  dubious virtue ." When convenience drains an activity of its meaning, it becomes less valuable.  Access the book, Four Thousand Weeks: https://www.oliverburkeman.com/fourtho...

“You pity the moth for confusing a lamp for the moon but here you are confusing a screen for the world.” - JAY ALTO  “The really important kind of freedom involves attention, and awareness, and discipline, and effort, and being able truly to care about other people and to sacrifice for them, over and over, in myriad petty little unsexy ways, every day." - David Foster Wallace David Foster Wal...

We know that Breathwork, nourishment, sleep, and a safe environment regulate your nervous system.  Play regulates your nervous system, too. Touch regulates your nervous system, sensory deprivation does too. Nature regulates your nervous system, so does being around community. Travel regulates your nervous system, and so does returning to your home. Routine can regulate your nervous system, an...

The goal is conscious choices > conditioned responses. Our society bases it’s values on exploitation, violation, and extraction - and we’ve been letting that society convince us of what parts of ourselves are palatable, acceptable, and welcome. But we can’t depend on a broken society to share wisdom to make us less broken.  You get to prove it’s safe to “decide” for yourself what parts of...

Don't forget to rehearse the best case scenario for every worst case scenario rehearsal. S - Stop! - Freeze! Your emotions may try to make you act without thinking. Stay in control! T - Take a step back! - Take a break. Let go. Take a breath. Reevaluate. O - Observe! - Notice what is going on inside and outside. What is the situation? What are your thoughts and feelings? What are others saying or...

Make a commitment to drop your usual escape methods as soon as you notice yourself doing them, and redirect. Maybe that looks like doing the opposite action, or it could be something subtle you do mentally, or say out loud to yourself, or write down, or tell someone else about.  Today's resource is accessible here and here . Read Julie's Medium Blog . Support JULIE (and the show!) Support + g...

Practice, patience, and persistence is required to reinforce the neural pathways you'd rather reinforce. Some distress is unavoidable, and you are fully capable of dealing with distress. Balance improving + acceptance. When you feel yourself self soothing with something negative, redirect. Practice creating space between your immediate reaction and your actual response. Show your brain it's safe t...

Coping with stress? No thanks. Avoiding stress? Yes please. I tend to use a combination platter of situational avoidance, numbing, reassurance seeking, over-planning, constant checking, and more! That said, it only creates more of a mess for me down the road. Something that has helped me sit with myself more honestly is to recognize that emotions and uncomfortable feelings come in waves. I can lea...

The more we fear, struggle with, and try to avoid any form of distress, generally the worse that distress gets.  Distress intolerance remains due to certain beliefs they have developed about experiencing negative emotions. These beliefs tend to centre on the notion that negative emotion is bad in some way, unbearable, unacceptable, or will lead to disastrous consequences. These beliefs tend t...

Today's resource is accessible here . A negative emotion in itself is not necessarily distressing, we only begin to feel distressed when we evaluate our emotional experience as a bad thing. Read Julie's Medium Blog . Support JULIE (and the show!) Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON . Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.com Tune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUB...

Seeing traumatic symptoms as an interrupted natural response and as unreleased energy in the body rather than a disease can lift a burden for traumatized people. -  Daniela Ramirez-Duran Noticing Physical Comfort  – Feeling physical support and experiencing your physical boundaries in a safe space can bring feelings of comfort. Self-Soothing Touch  – Boundaries are usually broken wi...

Somatic Experiencing is a therapy that focuses on the mind-body connection to help alleviate trauma-related tension stored in the body. https://positivepsychology.com/somatic-experiencing/ https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/-/media/CCI/Consumer-Modules/Facing-Your-Feelings/Facing-Your-Feelings---01---Understanding-Distress-Intolerance.pdf Read Julie's Medium Blog . Support JULIE (and the show!) Supp...