Make Your Damn Bed

How do we hold space for two contradictory ideas? How do we hold space for the reality that things won't always make sense? We can't control everything, but we can build up our "tolerance for distress", which can lead us to wanting to control the stuff we can't, less. The source: https://dialecticalbehaviortherapy.com/distress-tolerance/cost-benefit-analysis/ SUPPORT JULIE (and the show!) DONATE t...

"Living systems theory has been so helpful to me. I think there is a drive within living systems to complexify, to wake up—there is an evolutionary movement. I speak out of the love and excitement generated by my little work, which many people are doing with me. It does require being able to experience pain. It does require tears and outrage. It does require positive disintegration. Our whole cult...

Today we talk about what  Joanna Macy  and  Chris Johnstone 's book  Active Hope . Specifically the three stages of dealing with the current crisis. “Business as Usual” - Those who refuse to change. The people that believe that the current system is the best or only way. “The Great Unravelling” - Those who are inundated with despair about the fact that people are still in "busi...

America has a habit of blaming poor people + immigrants for the problems that policy makers create. Stop letting the oppressors scapegoat the oppressed, and start focusing your outrage on the people who perpetuate (and profit from) this harmful false narrative. The Big Short Script: https://www.sellingyourscreenplay.com/wp-content/uploads/screenplay/scripts/The-Big-Short.pdf The "Careful, that for...

"Perhaps the greatest failure of liberal democracies is their historical failure to successfully protect the vital economic and security interests of their less advantaged citizens through their institutions." "It is a cruel irony that this great promise of democracy is rarely realized in practice." "The job of trade unions, parties, and even radical social movements is precisely to institutionali...

How do we really know anything? Well, it starts by connecting with what you feel. Faron Sage's article: "How Do We Make Heads or Tails of What's Going On?" SUPPORT JULIE (and the show!) DONATE to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund AND THE Sudan Relief Fund GET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.com TUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE SUBSCRIBE FOR BONUS CONTENT ON PA...

It's that time again, where we take a step back and check in with the cop in our heads. “One day you will be called upon to break a big law in the name of justice and rationality. Everything will depend on it. You have to be ready. How are you going to prepare for that day when it really matters? You have to stay "in shape" so that when the big day comes you will be ready. What you need is "anarch...

Your brain does what is reliable, not what is best. It does what is safe, not what is productive. Our culture has shaped each and every one of us through rules + repetition. How has society tampered down the way you connect to your body and to others? How has society's expectations stifled you? How have our societal norms impacted the way you feel? and react? Can you buck some of those norms for a...

optimize your cues + your environment to create + reinforce better habits + discourage your "not so good" ones. Time cues < (paired with another) action cues. "I will do this at 7 am every single day" is waaaaay harder to commit to than committing to something with something else, "I will do this after I do that." Intrinsic motivation > external rewards Tweak your environment to reduce the f...

You can, in fact, teach an old dog new tricks - if you use a couple of old ones. Habits are formed and reinforced through repetition, salience (how much it stands out), time, intensity, specificity. Today we talk about what that means. https://www.carolinafnc.com/post/10-principles-of-neuroplasticity https://www.joincarbon.com/blog/the-neuroscience-of-habit-formation Use findhelp.org is an amazing...

Repetition is how we learn, so be careful what (and who) you're listening to. The source: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-main-ingredient/202509/harnessing-the-power-of-repetition-for-good-and-evil More reading: https://www.neurolab360.com/blog/principles-of-neuroplasticity-repetition-matters Use findhelp.org is an amazing website where you can type in your zip code and it will show yo...

Today we talk about how to build your tolerance for discomfort. THE SOURCE: https://shoesandshots.substack.com/p/discomfort-is-the-price-you-pay-for Further reading: https://www.outsideonline.com/health/training-performance/dealing-pain-discomfort/ and: https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/living-well-when-your-body-doesnt-cooperate/202405/stretching-distress-tolerance Use findhelp.org is an am...

It's not about giving in, and it's not about fighting it. Sometimes, you can just observe, ride the wave, and allow it to pass. Resisting Impulse Spending: https://www.inc.com/jessica-stillman/holiday-shopping-personal-finance-spending.html Urge Surfing: https://www.dartmouth-hitchcock.org/sites/default/files/2021-03/urge-surfing.pdf Stop impulse Spending Hacks: https://bodybrainalliance.com/stop-...

You are not a failure if you’re struggling right now, though it may feel like it. But your value and worth is not reflected in your ability to pay your bills that don’t stop growing, and your ability to get up and do anything beyond work that never stops coming.  Poverty is a systemic failing, not a personal failing. Remember you can’t really think straight when you’re really “broke” (I don’t...

Did you know you can "hack your brain" for things beyond your productivity? You can become more resilient, more conscious, more in control, through a few simple practices. It's not about avoiding anything that makes us feel sad, but it's about becoming conscious of the process of engaging with it. It's not about the content, but the process. Empowering vs. Disempowering yourself. INSPIRED BY: http...

Feeling disconnected or unsure? Dr. Pat suggests: Body Check-In:  When you consume news about social or political issues, what sensations do you notice in your body? Do you feel tense, numb, energized? Triggers and Ancestry:  Think about a recent moment you felt fear or shut down in response to authority or conflict. How might this reaction connect to your community’s historical or ances...

Did you know you can "hack your brain" for things beyond your productivity? You can become more resilient, more conscious, more in control, through a few simple practices. It's not about avoiding anything that makes us feel sad, but it's about becoming conscious of the process of engaging with it. It's not about the content, but the process. Empowering vs. Disempowering yourself. INSPIRED BY: http...

Our brains are malleable, and we can actually enrich our experiences to encourage more "plasticity" or adaptability in our own heads - if we know what to look for. Very Well Mind on Brain plasticity: https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-brain-plasticity-2794886#:~:text=Strengthening%20existing%20pathways:%20Neurons%20that,adapt%20to%20the%20changing%20environment. Resources for Resisting a Coup: h...

Think about a good joke. If you knew the punchline right away? It's less funny. If you had to have the punchline explained? Less funny. But if you understood the punchline within a few moments, and got the satisfaction of "realization" in real time? That makes a BANGER of a joke. It's all about the appropriate level of challenge and thinking. According to Daniel Willingham's book, "Why Students Do...

It's not about spinning all the plates, it's about setting most of them down so you can actually focus on the spinning process. THE SOURCES: Reducing cognitive load to learn: https://theelearningcoach.com/learning/reduce-cognitive-load/ Getting into flow state: https://rts-1988.medium.com/getting-to-flow-state-while-studying-simulating-mental-effort-while-reading-543eecdee6ca Resources for Resisti...

When I’m having a rough time, trying to treat myself like I liked to treat my students, with empathy, compassion, patience, kindness, attention, care, time, etc. and in an effort to build muscles that can provide them with that empathy, compassion, patience, kindness, attention, time, care, etc. for themselves? I feel like the everyday things that I sometimes struggle with, are more doable. More a...

Instead of trying to control others, become a consultant. "Children need thoughtful guidance and firm, enforceable limits. We set those limits based on the safety of the child and how the child’s behavior affects others. Then we must maintain those limits to help children understand that they are responsible for their actions and will suffer reasonable consequences for actions that are inappropria...

"Effective parenting centers around love: love that is not permissive, love that doesn’t tolerate disrespect, but also love that is powerful enough to allow kids to make mistakes and permit them to live with the consequences of those mistakes. Most mistakes do have logical consequences. And those consequences, when accompanied by empathy — our compassionate understanding of the child’s disappointm...

Enjoy this throwback episode (from day 872) before the new series drops on Monday! "There's a sucker born every minute." - P.T. Barnum Carl Sagan shares guidelines with us for how to critically think. Today, I share them with you! Critical thinking never goes out of style. especially when we consider how MUCH information we are forced to take in on a daily basis. Historically speaking, Never have...

ENJOY THIS THROWBACK EPISODE FROM DAY 751, BEFORE THE NEW SERIES DROPS ON MONDAY - Make a list of all the shit you're good at + a list of all the good shit in your life + all the shit that bothers you about your life. Using the first two lists, attempt to solve the last list and bingo-bango you've got yourself a lil action plan template. WATCH: www.youtube.com/juliemerica GET A MONTHLY NOTE FROM M...