Let’s Get Vulnerable: Relationship and Dating Advice

Is what you’re getting enough to grieve what you’re not? My friend Sabrina Zohar is back on the show for round three, and this time she’s bringing her brand new book along. We talk about the night she sent 173 texts (her count stopped there because her phone kept refreshing), the programming that made her believe she was too much and not enough at the same time, and the moment she lost the person...

Have you ever been more devastated over someone you almost dated than someone you actually dated? Maybe it was only a few dates. Maybe it was never official. You still find yourself rereading the texts, checking their stories, and comparing everyone you meet to a relationship that never actually existed. I’ve been there, and there’s nothing wrong with you. Today we’re kicking off a brand new serie...

What if secure attachment was never something you had to earn? This episode has been on my heart for months, and I'm so glad it's finally here. So many of us walk around saying "I'm anxious" or "I'm avoidant" like it's a life sentence. But you weren't born with an insecure attachment style. You were born with an attachment system designed for secure love, and everything else was a brilliant surviv...

You can know exactly what a healthy relationship looks like and still find yourself sending that third text. Awareness matters, but it was never going to be enough on its own. In Pt. 1 we did the belief work, in Pt. 2 we worked with your nervous system, and today we're putting the rubber to the road with what secure attachment actually looks like in your behaviors with real human beings. If you've...

If you still get anxious when someone pulls away, does that mean you haven't healed? "Heal your nervous system" gets thrown around constantly, and almost nobody explains what it actually means. So in Part 2 of this series, I'm breaking it down in plain language, in the context of your attachment style and your real relationships. I've spent years living in disorganized attachment, and I've helped...

What if the reason you keep repeating the same relationship patterns has nothing to do with willpower, and everything to do with the map your brain is still using? You know your attachment style. You can name your triggers in real time. And somehow you're still ending up in the same place with a different person. Here's what I wish someone had told me in my twenties: awareness is necessary, but aw...

If you love yourself beautifully when you're single and then lose yourself the second you're in a relationship, this one's for you. We're wrapping up Self-Love September with the question so many of you bring to me: what does it actually look like to love yourself while you're loving someone else? I spent years focused on becoming securely attached and attracting my person, and then I had to learn...

She almost said no to the man who became her person, because he didn't check every box. This week I'm sitting down with Serena Kerrigan, author of Let's Fucking Date , to talk about the standards that almost kept her from Felix, the guy who's now her partner of four years. Serena opens up about the "deal breakers" she used to swear by, why she almost walked away from someone six years younger, and...

Here's the thing nobody tells you about self-love: you can do all the right behaviors and still feel empty if the beliefs underneath them are broken. I'm recording this one from a hotel room in New York, and honestly, I've been thinking about this episode all day. This is part two of our September Self-Love series, and I want to talk about something I don't think gets talked about enough, the actu...

When you hear the words "self-love," what comes to mind? A bubble bath? Treating yourself to lunch? Setting a boundary or two? Those things aren't wrong, but they're not the whole picture. In this episode, I'm sharing my personal, working definition of self-love, the one I've landed on after years in this work with my own healing and sitting across from countless clients. We're going to talk about...

You can understand your attachment style perfectly and still repeat it every single time. That's not a you problem, that's the missing piece nobody talks about. This is the episode I've been building toward all series. If you've ever sat there thinking "I know why I do this, I've read the books, I've named the pattern... So why do I still react the same way?" this one's for you. Insight is the beg...

Reassurance isn't the problem. The wrong kind of reassurance is. If you've ever heard "I'm not leaving" or "we're fine" and felt your nervous system stay exactly as anxious as it was five minutes ago, this episode is for you. Part 3 of Attachment Theory Got an Upgrade is diving into the research on why reassurance sometimes calms us down and sometimes completely misses the mark. I'm breaking down...

A secure partner cannot heal your attachment style. I need you to sit with that for a second. This is part two of our Attachment Theory Got an Upgrade series, and it's a good one. We're breaking down a 2025 study that followed over 1,000 couples for 20 months and the findings challenge the story so many of us tell ourselves: that finding the "right" person will just heal us. I've believed that too...

You've spent years blaming your mom for your anxious attachment, but what if she's only part of the story? I am kicking off a brand new series today and I cannot wait to get into it with you. We're calling it "Attachment Theory Got an Upgrade," because after years of watching this concept get flattened on social media, I wanted to bring you the real, nuanced, research-backed picture, starting with...

These are the ten truths that quietly rearranged my entire life, and I'm handing every single one of them to you. Girl, we've made it to the final episode of my birthday series, and I saved the best for last. This one is the mindset shifts, the internal rewires that changed how I see myself, my relationships, and what I'm actually capable of building at 37. Some of these took me years to learn. So...

For years I bought into a script I didn't even write, play hard to get, shrink yourself, don't be "too much," wait for love to just happen to you. I lived by these rules and they kept me stuck on repeat, dating the wrong people and wondering why nothing changed. In this episode, part three of my 37 Unfiltered birthday series, I'm getting brutally honest about the 10 (plus a bonus) lies dating cult...

Continuing the birthday series, I'm getting real unfiltered about the seven relationship non-negotiables I didn't even know to ask for at 30 and now, five+ years into my relationship, I will not budge on. Some of these took me years of healing (and a lot of self-abandoning relationships) to even recognize as options. If you've never had someone model healthy conflict, financial transparency, or an...

It's my birthday, y'all and I'm turning 37 with 10 confessions. To kick off my new series, 37 Unfiltered , I'm sharing the 10 things I stopped doing that changed my life, from alcohol to people-pleasing to paying for people's love. This is the real stuff. Not the highlight reel, the years of small decisions that actually moved me toward secure attachment. Inside the Episode: Why I stopped numbing...

Girl, we've made it to part four of The Disorganized Diaries, and this is the episode I've been waiting to give you. We've talked about what disorganized attachment is, where it comes from, and how ADHD and neurodivergence can pour gasoline on the fire. Today we're finally talking about the way out. And I need you to hear this: knowing something logically does not turn off the internal alarm syste...

You're not "too much" and you're not broken — your nervous system just learned to survive in chaos, and now it's time to teach it something new. Y'all, this one is personal. Disorganized attachment (aka fearful avoidant) is the attachment style I lived in for a huge chunk of my life before I did the work to become securely attached and it's also the one that gets talked about the least. In this ep...

If the person you were supposed to run to for safety was also the person who scared you, your nervous system learned a lesson that's still running your relationships today. Girl, this one goes deep. In part two of the Disorganized Diaries series, I'm taking you back to the origin, where disorganized attachment actually comes from, and why it's the attachment style I lived in for almost three decad...

You're not broken, and you're not "too much." You're just fluent in two survival strategies that never got the chance to work. Girl, this episode kicks off a brand new series I'm calling The Disorganized Diaries, and I am so excited (and honestly a little nervous) to go here with y'all. If you've ever felt like you crave closeness one minute and feel suffocated by it the next... if you've ever lov...

Y'all, I need you to hear this today: the belief that "it's too late for me" is not a fact, it's a thought you've been watering for years, and today we're ripping it out at the root. In this episode I'm walking you through the exact belief systems that keep so many of you stuck in relationships that go nowhere, the scarcity stories, the "I'm too broken," the "the good ones are gone", and I'm showi...

Y'all, I've worked with thousands of women at this point, and I am telling you, there is a pattern. A real, predictable pattern that shows up right before a woman walks into the healthiest, most secure relationship of her life. In this episode I'm sharing my client Megan's story (name changed, story so real), a high-functioning executive who left an abusive marriage, did the deep work, and is now...

Y'all, have you ever stopped to think about the fact that you are literally teaching people how to treat you every single day? In this episode, part of our High Self-Worth Summer series, I'm getting into one of the most requested topics I get: boundaries. But before we go there, I want to talk about something that doesn't get enough airtime, which is standard. Because here's the thing, your standa...