Latter Day Struggles

Send us a Positive Review! In this episode, Valerie pushes back on the common belief in the LDS church that the "a la carte" approach to gospel belief is evidence of lack of faith, trust, and commitment to one's spiritual growth.   She builds a case for the "a la carte" approach to building one's beliefs as more risky in the short term (yes, our own agency means we mi...

Send us a Positive Review! In this episode, Val and Nathan share how in the church we sometimes use the transitive property of logic to draw sweeping conclusions to issues that merit individual study and personal discernment.  No matter what they told you to teach in the MTC, if one thing is true (or false), then everything else is not necessarily true (or false).  Support the show Stories of Heal...

Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: When Mom Feels Like a Robot [Part II of II] Join Val in a brief follow up to her last episode discussing the negative psychological, emotional, and relational, and spiritual impact that women often experience due to the LDS church's historical hyper-focus on marriage and childrearing as a woman's primary role in life.  This episode focuses on how...

Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: When Mom Feels Like a Robot [Part I of II] Join Valerie in this episode as she breaks down a typical client that comes into her private counseling practice...the numb, exhausted, dutiful, mom. Our work together is to learn more about how she got here and how its possible that she can feel so crappy after having done all of the right things.  Support the sho...

Send us a Positive Review! Join Valerie and Nathan as they address a podcast listener's question regarding "rules" about a variety of dress/grooming related issues that are given at church and seem random, unimportant, and even not appropriate to be dictating to a body of thoughtful, discerning human beings.   In this episode they talk about the concept of the "inverted value s...

Send us a Positive Review! Join Val and Nathan as they share some thoughts on why gender and sexuality is a topic that brings up strong feelings in just about everyone. And it should bring up strong feelings, because these are core parts of our individual identities.   Each of us has a journey to discover the depths of ourselves---including who we are in the realms of sexuality and gender.  And wh...

Send us a Positive Review! Join Valerie and Nathan this week as they riff about obedience to rules as opposed to obedience to conscience and highlight how even those who are considered the most evolved are held hostage to their own culture's anxieties, fears, and quirks. The good news is that maybe we are all just beautifully messy and in need of self and other compassion and an increase in &...

Send us a Positive Review! Join Valerie and guest host Brannon as they talk about a struggle brought into Valerie's therapy practice where a bride and groom are working on making the hard choice to be true to themselves even if that means devastating extended family about their desire to not marry in the temple.   Is it possible that their greatest act of integrity and growth is to do what fe...

Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: The Sanctity of Dissent [Part V of V] In this final episode on Valerie and Nathan's series on the sacred nature of dissent, they talk about how paradoxically, dissent is the foundation of true peace.  What?  Yes, it is.  True peace can only be attained through complex dialogue amongst parties whose ideas are all considered and welcomed.   They also add...

Send us a Positive Review! Join Brannon and Val in this comical and true-to-life (and perhaps familiar sounding) struggle between two spouses juggling the needs of their primary-aged children, less-active older children, and their own messy faith questions...all at the same time.   How can couples authentically have their own very different journeys while also trying to cultivate faith in their ki...

Send us a Positive Review! Join Valerie and Nathan as they talk about recent incidents related to their talking about dissent in the LDS faith.    Their 5 Part "sacred nature of dissent" series (which is rudely interrupted by this episode...there IS one more episode left in this series) has brought up some angst in "concerned" listeners (because...dissent) and Valerie and Natha...

Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: The Sanctity of Dissent [Part IV of V] Join therapist Valerie Hamaker and her husband Nathan as they tackle the tendency to shame dissent and worship consent in the LDS faith. In this episode it is all about dissent and its power to heal blindness.   They start with how a "consent only" culture develops people who are not introspective, curious, o...

Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: The Sanctity of Dissent [Part III of V] In this episode Val and Nathan address the consent/dissent idea as core to developing our own powers of personal revelation and then go on to discuss how a "consent only" church is one that get lost in the weeds of irrelevancies and blind to true worship of God.  And when we are not worshipping God but are w...

Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: The Sanctity of Dissent [Part II of V]  In this episode they break how dissent is sacred as it is essential to our personal salvation projects and because it is the backbone of spiritual maturation and personal responsibility.   They highlight the need for us to both notice and gain personal courage as we engage in dissent as a an essential part of our spir...

Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: The Sanctity of Dissent [Part I of V] Do you want fast-food-like religion, quick, simple, uncomplicated, black-and-white, and complete with all of the thinking and revelation done elsewhere?  In this series Valerie will explore the temptation to worship the idea of consent and demonize the idea of dissent.   Valerie will use the beautiful book titled "...

Send us a Positive Review! Join Val and Brannon this week as they talk about the gift of agency and how in principle it is taught as a concept fundamental to our faith tradition but how in actuality it is often not overly encouraged.   They share personal examples of growing in their own capacities to practice agency and how when practiced it can become a principle that really moves us from fearfu...

Send us a Positive Review! In this episode, join Brannon and Valerie as they answer this question with an emphatic "NO" and develop this complex topic about staying and going.   They talk about those who doubt quietly [and often judiciously] and finally need to step away, those who speak out, those who leave as an act of integrity, and those who might dissent and yet choose to stay as an...

Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Valerie looks at an idea of organizational psychologist Adam Grant regarding 4 choices people make when confronted with challenging feelings in an institution that they care about (work place, church, etc). We either speak up, walk away, silently persist, or check out.   Valerie breaks these down and talks a little about the impact that each choice has on...

Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Val and Brannon look at the example of Winston Churchill and talk about what made him a truly great leader.  The bottom line?  He was interested in the ideas, thoughts, feelings, and experiences of the people he led.  And even allowed himself to be persuaded by them.  How much do we feel heard as "normal people" sitting in the pews at church?  H...

Send us a Positive Review! Join Brannon and Val as they look at how history has been trying to demonize and then erase the feminine divine for thousands of years and how the divine stature of women has morphed from holy and revered to marginalized and subservient.  The bottom line:  It hasn't always been this way.  Our LDS culture's current interest in this topic may just be part of the...

Send us a Positive Review! Join Valerie and Brannon this week as General Conference weekend approaches and they riff about the nostalgia of General Conference in years gone by with all of the accompanying orthodox "warm fuzzies" and how much more complex but also soul-stretching it is for them to watch, listen, and use our own God-Given discernment during these world-wide meetings as the...

Send us a Positive Review! In this episode, Valerie and Brannon break down the "subtle mandate" of church callings.  They talk about how prioritizing callings over family can be problematic.  They discuss the importance of being able to say no, to discern for oneself if a calling is really what God wants them to do.  Support the show Stories of Healing: Live Event July 30th in SLC Suppor...

Send us a Positive Review! Join Valerie and Brannon as they talk about Valerie’s experience awakening to the impact that patriarchy has had in her own development, choices, life experiences.  Support the show Stories of Healing: Live Event July 30th in SLC Support the show Listen, Share, Rate & Review EPISODES Friday Episodes Annual Access $89 Friday Episodes Monthly Access $10 Valerie’s Suppo...

Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Is Doubt a Sin? [Part II of II] In this episode Brannon and Valerie talk about the importance of doubt.  They break down faith and why doubt is crucial to spiritual development.  They also discuss why we are taught to not doubt but to "doubt our doubts" and why that can be problematic. Support the show Stories of Healing: Live Event July 30th in S...

Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Is Doubt a Sin? [Part I of II] In this episode Brannon and Valerie talk about the importance of doubt.  They break down faith and why doubt is crucial to spiritual development.  They also discuss why we are taught to not doubt but to "doubt our doubts" and why that can be problematic.  Support the show Stories of Healing: Live Event July 30th in S...