Knock Knock, Hi! with the Glaucomfleckens

After surviving Disney motion-simulator rides that nearly ended me, I dive into a question that’s been rattling around my brain all break: if AI replaces doctors… who gets sued when something goes wrong? We talk AI hype, liability, tech companies discovering malpractice culture the hard way, and why replacing physicians isn’t as simple as Silicon Valley thinks it is. Then we get back to basics: ho...

This episode starts with the important questions, like whether I’m emotionally prepared to return to my ancestral homeland of Big Bend National Park, and whether Kristin would rather share a cabin with a venomous snake or a tarantula. From there, things take a turn into real life: a med student driving for Uber and Lyft just to make ends meet. That story opens up a bigger conversation about medica...

In this episode of Knock Knock Eye, I start by breaking down Elon Musk’s latest medical hot take. The idea that everyone should get a yearly full-body MRI interpreted by AI. Then I talk about why I finally said screw it and paid cash for my own medical care after insurance insisted my testicles might have magically regenerated. And finally, a mystery case that starts as blurry vision and floaters...

This week, Kristin and I talk with Jason Pang, Director of EMS, and Joe Stoffolano, Division Chief of Community Risk Reduction in Miami Township, Ohio. These guys take us deep into the world of pre-hospital medicine. We’re talking how EMS is funded, why those funding streams vanish, the future of EMS, and much more. We also break down how 911 dispatch actually works, how EMS decides what units to...

Hollywood, we need to talk. If one more movie shows an eyeball dangling from someone’s cheek, I might start mailing anatomy textbooks to Los Angeles. And while we’re at it, can we please stop calling every wandering eye a “lazy eye”? After a quick rant about my personal ophthalmology pet peeves, I dive into one of the strangest mystery cases I’ve ever seen: a 47-year-old with sudden, complete opht...

This week, Kristin and I answer listener comments about colonoscopy prep, including a truly cursed diet of mashed white vegetables and learn about Cologuard, the screening test where you… mail your poop. Through the actual mail. To a stranger. We also dive into the ongoing household war known as “Kristin Won’t Stop Sleeping in Her Contacts,” which leads to a horrifying discussion about wrinkly eye...

This week, I start by sharing why First Descents, the nonprofit that helped me rebuild community and trust in my body after cancer, deserves a spot on your end-of-year giving list. And then, because it is Christmas, I diagnose the eyeballs of Charlie Brown, the Grinch, Rudolph, and even Jack Skellington. From aniridia to jaundice to reindeer esotropia, it’s a holiday episode only an ophthalmologis...

It’s Christmas, which means two things: Kristin’s wearing a periodic-table tree shirt, and I’m reminiscing about the worst cafeteria meal in VA history (“brown meal,” may it never return). But the real adventure this week? Our kid suddenly developed mysterious brown patches on her skin, smooth, painless, and deeply unsettling for two parents whose medical degrees contain zero pediatrics. Cue the p...

This week, I’m answering your YouTube questions, including why my histology shirt is back, and then diving into a mystery case straight from the ICU. A sedated teenager with a swollen face, red eyes, and a whole lot of chemosis needs help, and I show up with… my ophthalmologist luggage. What I found is something every ICU clinician has seen but doesn’t always recognize: exposure keratopathy, the c...

This week, Kristin and I break down the kind of healthcare headline that makes you want to scream into a pillow: premiums going up while subsidies disappear. Love that for us. We talk about why insurance always seems to be “oops, more expensive now!” and why families in the middle always get squeezed the hardest. But then we pivot to the good news, we got fact-checked by an actual biochemist. And...

This week, I’m diving into one of the weirdest modern medical questions: what actually makes a “top doctor” in the age of TikTok? After an Allure article exposed the rise, and sometimes fall, of social-media-famous plastic surgeons, I have thoughts. Many thoughts. Mostly about ethics, entertainment, and why the operating room should never be a live-streaming studio. Then we shift into something mu...

This week, Kristin and I dive into aphantasia, anendophasia, and why apparently my wife’s brain works more like a slideshow than a podcast. I’m learning things about her that I wish I didn’t know, and she’s learning that most people don’t think in GIFs. We also talk about what happens when meditation goes wrong, how brains get rewired after trauma, and why sometimes “turning your brain off” might...

This week I ran into something online that made my ophthalmologist brain short-circuit: a brand-new CDC statement about autism and vaccines that… let’s just say does not follow how science actually works. So I’m breaking down the logic, the frustration, and why “prove it’s not true” is one of the worst arguments in medicine. Then, because I can only rant for so long before needing to retreat into...

This week on Glauc Talk, Kristin and I unpack the bizarre ways people twist “correlation vs. causation” and why apparently every high school should have a mandatory class on basic biostats. We talk about protestors, parenting, penis decisions (you’ll see), and somehow end up designing the world’s most chaotic public health curriculum. Then we pivot to something a little closer to home, physician s...

This week, I’m doing something different. No eyeball emergencies, no angry rants about healthcare, just gratitude. In this Thanksgiving special, I’m giving thanks to the people who shaped me: my high school English teacher who believed in my writing, the German teacher who let me hide pencils in my hair, the residency mentor who saw the future ophthalmologist before I did, and, of course, Lady Gla...

This week, Kristin and I dig into my long-overdue skin check, a gift from my mom (because nothing says “happy birthday” like preventative medicine). We talk about awkward gown moments, dermatologists who multitask like superheroes, and why apparently I’m not famous in derm circles. Then we get a little more serious about why it takes forever to get a doctor’s appointment, how the physician shortag...

In this episode, I’m breaking down what a week of ophthalmology call actually looks like, why retinal detachments aren’t the emergency you think they are, and how one cartoon wolf ended up being my latest ocular diagnosis. Plus, in the latest installment of my “Signs and Symptoms” series, we’re talking eyelash loss, bleeding eyes (aka hyphema), and the fine line between “put your pants on now” and...

Kristin and I start off by talking about puzzles, rainy vacations, and why Scotland might be the best place on earth, mostly because they have giant defibrillator kiosks just sitting out in public. Then, somehow, that conversation spirals into an in-depth analysis of Kristin’s many fears (spiders, the ocean, nouns too close to her face: you name it). We also dive back into our favorite recurring s...

I’m trying something new: differentials. Each episode, I’ll pick one ocular sign and one ocular symptom, and walk you through everything that could cause them. This week: the mysterious “abnormal red reflex” and the all-too-common “my eyes are burning.” From cataracts and retinoblastoma to blepharitis and bad makeup glue, I’m breaking down the real possibilities, one red, irritated eyeball at a ti...

This week, Kristin and I sit down with Wendy Bryan Lazar, the founder of I Heart Guts, the company making plush organs so lovable you almost forget they’re based on, you know, actual human guts. We dive into how she turned her background in design and a deep love of anatomy into a wildly successful brand that celebrates the weird, wonderful world inside us. We talk about the real challenges of bri...

From ophthalmology to testicle jokes, this episode covers a lot. I’m talking about why physicians should be allowed to own hospitals, the internet debate over vision therapy, and the truth about whether your eyes can actually pop out if you sneeze too hard. Plus, I share the one time an ophthalmologist asked a patient to drop his pants and why professional athletes might be missing out by skipping...

So… I turned 40. And like any doctor staring down middle age, I celebrated by talking about colonoscopy prep. This week, Kristin and I unpack everything that happens to your body when you hit your forties, from dry eyes and presbyopia to statins and perimenopause. (Don’t worry, it’s still funny.) We talk about getting old, staying healthy, and why I’m way too excited to film my own colonoscopy. Th...

I went to Disney World and ended up diagnosing cartoon characters. From Mike Wazowski’s lack of depth perception to Goofy’s questionable eye anatomy and Winnie the Pooh’s all pupil, no iris situation, I’m breaking down which Disney characters would absolutely fail a vision test. Plus, a quick dive into a real breakthrough from Stanford that might help restore sight lost to macular degeneration. It...

This week, Kristin and I dive into two real-world CPR stories. One that’ll make your blood boil (looking at you, Hofstra bar exam), and another that’ll make you want to hug a comedian in Spokane. We talk about what happens when bystanders freeze, how quick thinking saves lives, and why everyone should know at least something about CPR. Then I drag Kristin into a round of “Doctor Strange or Just St...

Can you really “train” your eyes to work better or is vision therapy mostly hype? In this episode, I’m breaking down the three main types of vision therapy, what the science says about each, and how to tell when it’s actually helpful versus when it’s just expensive pseudoscience. We’ll talk convergence insufficiency (the one real winner), why eye exercises don’t fix dyslexia or myopia, and how to...